SQUAW PIQUECAST YOUR VOTE IN THE NEW TIMES TOTEM POLL

Squaw Peak?!
Ugh and double ugh! How politically incorrect can one mountain be?
Heap big plenty, according to Phoenix Councilmember Calvin Goode.

Earlier this month, the man called Goode received a complaint from a Native American constituent who reportedly found the north Phoenix mountain's moniker "offensive." Realizing that where there's a smoke signal, there's fire, Goode hit the media warpath, publicly questioning the PC wisdom of the mountain's moniker, as well as its nearby namesake, the Squaw Peak Parkway.

"What I asked staff to do is check with some people in the Indian community to see if this was offensive," says Goode. "If it is, I don't think we ought to have anything to offend people."
(Had Goode powwowed with a local historian, he might have learned that things could be a lot worse. According to legend, if city fathers hadn't altered the original name of the geographic landmark years ago, motorists would now be cruising the--honest injun--Squaw Tit Peak Parkway.)

Not that Squaw Peak is the only name Goode has reservations about. Perhaps referring to the glut of Valley businesses reaping wampum from inappropriate use of Indian names (see photos), Goode avers, "If there are other derogatory terms that come up, certainly I want them changed."

And how!
Wake up and smell the fry bread! The Valley needs kemo therapy, so let's tackle our biggest problem first and rename Squaw Peak--pronto!

"WASP Bitch Peak?" "Milquetoast Mesa?" "Squaw Mountain?"
Well, you get the idea. Simply rename Squaw Peak (receive bonus points for dreaming up a separate name for the parkway), and you and a companion may win a dinner with Calvin Goode* at Tee Pee Mexican Food restaurant. Entries must be received by Friday, January 8; the names of the winner and runners-up will be published in a future issue. Geronimo!