Number One With a Mullet

Heavy metal gets the lite treatment in the cliché-studded Rock Star

It's as though Herek and Stockwell (who wrote HBO's Breast Men) felt that in order to make a "serious" rock movie, they had to capitulate to the genre's worst excesses, and so we're treated to countless scenes of dance-floor orgies (complete with chicks with dicks), backstage "pussy passes," drug binges, trashed hotel rooms and blood transfusions. Herek's made a bloated concept album about faith and redemption and left off all the good songs -- the ones that make you wanna pump your fist in the air, wave your Bic and scream for vengeance. Rock Star takes itself so seriously it becomes full-on parody -- This Is Spinal Tap as a sanctimonious cautionary tale. And how rock 'n' roll is that?

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