Motley Crew

Bikers, skinheads, punks and coeds love getting bent at the PV, the divey-est dive in Tempe.

"Hey, that's like an old-style gangster tattoo," says Jett, eyeballin' Unale's ta-tas, over the top of which is a tatt of two blue birds carrying cherries in their mouths, flying over a flaming purple valentine with the words "broken-hearted" across it.

"I designed it myself," giggles Unale, who's a nursing major at ASU. "You like it?"

I can almost hear Jett gulp, before she gets out, "Uh, yeah. Those cherries are really nice."

Don Fleetwood, a.k.a.  "the Mack" Donald
Don Fleetwood, a.k.a. "the Mack" Donald
Barney "Barn-dog" Mullins
Barney "Barn-dog" Mullins

"I love cherries," relates Unale, coyly. "I love to suck on them and tie the stems into knots with my tongue."

"Very Twin Peaks," I say. "It's certainly a conversation piece, that tattoo. You must get a lot of horndogs coming up to you with lines. What's the worst one you've ever heard?"

"Let's see, 'I'm not Fred Flintstone, but I'm gonna rock your world,'" she says, laughing. "I seem to attract all the wrong guys. You know, the ones without jobs, who don't have any money. That's why I'm single, I guess."

"Uh-oh," I hear someone say behind me. "Here come the crackheads."

A group of especially thin, somewhat raggedy cats meander in and place their drink orders, but before Jett and I can ask them to hook us up with some bomb rock, this fella by the name of Marshall Reaves slinks up to us. Reaves, 22, wants to show off a pic on his digital camera that he took of him and his pretty, pixie-ish girlfriend Michelle Hayes, 23, in bed together, and buck nekkid from what we can see.

"Not bad," I comment, looking down at the image before us. "Wish we could see all the naughty bits. Wouldn't mind watching you two knock boots."

"Thanks," smiles Reaves, a skinny dude in a bright orange shirt, and fat, navy-blue tie with white dots. "I like to share."

"So what do you do when you're not working on your own amateur porn site?" I josh.

"I'm a senior at ASU," he tells us. "I'm a molecular biotech and biosciences major."

"You must have a really big brain, dude," says Jett.

"A little bit," he grins, his arm around his woman, who's wearing faded jeans and a flashy green jacket over a white tee. "I've got a 4.0 GPA. But I have to wear my head brace sometimes because it's so heavy, you know, so dense with knowledge."

"Wild, wacky stuff," I say. "So why do you come to the PV?"

"I dunno," wonders the smart-assed Stephen Hawking. "There's good people here, I suppose. And I don't get beat up, unless I really ask for it. Actually, there are lots of people here who'd like to go home with me. Unfortunately, they all have penises. Guess I'm pretty, or something."

"Hmm, that is a problem," says Jett, commiserating. "If I were you, I'd avoid prison at all costs."

"Yeah, with that whole prison-rape thing," smirks the Einstein of ASU. "It's not the rape that scares me so much as the cuddling afterwards."

Nearby, drinking a pitcher of Bud Light, is Barney "Barn-dog" Mullins, a true-blue biker wearing a big black cowboy hat, gray tee shirt and leather vest. Tanned and tatted with long hair and a handlebar mustache, Barn-dog works for SRP and has been coming in to the PV for longer than most of the rest of the bar's customers have been breathing.

"I used to come in here and drink underage back when it was the Adobe Lounge," says the easy rider. "We're talking about 33 or 34 years ago. I'm 53 now."

"What kind of a bike do you ride?" asks Jett.

"An old-school chopper, a Harley-Davidson," he says. "Her name's Sweetie. I've been riding Harleys all my life, ever since I was about 17. I've had six Harley-Davidsons and three wives so far. I guess you can tell my preference."

"So what do you like about the PV that you've been coming for so long?" I inquire.

"There are a couple of reasons," he responds. "All these kids who come in here with the black tee shirts, the long sideburns and the tattoos, they're kinda emulating the '60s and '70s, and they think I'm a really cool guy because I was there. The other reason is, if you want culture, this is it. You get a little bit of everything in here."

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this is an old ass article but I like, why don't you follow up, you know how quickly shit changes in Tempe...

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