By Melissa Fossum
By Lauren Wise
By New Times
By Amanda Savage
By Jason P. Woodbury
By Troy Farah
By New Times
Bands: Dave Matthews Band, and Slightly Stoopid
Date: Tuesday, August 30
Venue: Cricket Pavilion
Ticket Price: $20
Selling Point: These two bands have redefined adult alternative. Now it REALLY sucks!
Disclaimer: A year ago, the DMB's van dumped 800 pounds of liquid waste on a cruise liner, giving new meaning to the term "poop deck." The band members want it known that they have since eliminated the middleman (their driver) and now bring their human waste directly to you!
Possible Concession Item: Slightly Stoopid Smart Drinks.
Possible Grand Finale: Dave encourages the throng in the cheaper seats to play Musical Lawn Chairs while he and the band noodle interminably.
Bands: ABC, Colin Hay (of Men at Work), English Beat
Date: Wednesday, August 31
Venue: Celebrity Theatre
Ticket Price: $27.50-$45
Selling Point: '80s flashbacks have nothing to do with acid and everything to do with saxophones. ABC was considered a successful VH1 Bands Reunited, but the English Beat, which had twice as many original members, was not. Damn you, Aamer Haleem!
Disclaimer: Dave Wakeling once canceled an English Beat/General Public/Human League tour to open up for Hootie & the Blowfish. Hmm, someone's not down with the '80s.
Possible High Points: All three bands join onstage and decide to which side of the house Colin Hay's lazy eye is looking.
Possible Concession Item: Ever eat a Vegemite sandwich? Those who've sampled bread and tar can check yes!