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Munsil admitted the push-poll was correct, then wasted no time asking the CCEC to pony up $239,000 to compensate his campaign for the negative effects of the September 1 poll. The CCEC chopped that down a bit, but Munsil still came away richer than before the push-poll outed him as self-serving hypocrite.

For anyone else, premarital sex would be about as damaging to his or her career as a corn on the big toe. But Munsil loves cramming his Taliban-like view of human sexuality down everyone else's throat. Case in point: Proposition 107, the gay-marriage ban, for which Munsil's Center for Arizona Policy stumps.

The holier-than-thou Munsil also preaches abstinence before marriage, even though he couldn't keep his own jimmie in his pants before tying the knot. Don't worry, Len, this beaker's hero Bill Clinton couldn't check his libido, either. The Bird feels your pain! Lessened, no doubt, as you schlep that $80K check in public funds all the way to the bank.

Goofball Goldwater

As this column goes to press, the race for the Republican gubernatorial nomination still appears a toss-up between Munsil and Don Goldwater. So it remains to be seen how the push-poll controversy will play with voters. But Munsil's got money in his pocket, whereas Goldwater's already been somewhat tarnished by the affair, especially after going nuclear over the issue on conservative PHX talk radio show Liddy & Hill.

Didn't hear it? You missed a humdinger. Goldwater, you see, was mentioned in the same push-poll, but in a positive light, leading to speculation that someone in Goldwater's camp might be the push-poll's parent.

Goldwater continues to deny that either he or anyone in his campaign fathered the illegitimate poll. But last week Liddy & Hill — heard weekdays from 3 to 6 p.m. on KKNT-AM 960 — did a show on the Republican scandal, suggesting a Goldwater supporter might be the culprit, specifically Goldwater campaign adviser Phil Mason, a longtime GOP activist whom radio hosts Tom Liddy and Austin Hill characterized as having a "checkered past." Mason, it seems, lost a job as a state Senate staffer years back for doing some outside politicking while on the job, a no-no in state legislative offices.

For the record, Mason and Liddy have an old beef going back to Liddy's days as chair of the Maricopa County Republican Party. And Liddy, son of rat-eatin' Watergate felon G. Gordon Liddy, no less, admits to having "no proof" of Mason's involvement, while others, such as conservative political activist Bob Haran, have been accusing Mason of the deed on the 'Net.

Anyhoo, Goldwater called into the show, demanded to be put on the air, denied push-poll paternity, and squawked that he took "partial blame" for Mason's being fired from his Senate job way back when, because "I was sitting around his office putting stickers on an envelope without even thinking about it," when someone came in and told Goldwater he couldn't do that in a legislative office.

"I went, 'Oh, my God, what am I thinking?'" confessed Goober Goldwater. "I backed out, we got the material out of there and [Mason] took the blame for it."

Goldwater seemed oblivious to the fact that he'd made himself look dumber than dirt, and maybe even guilty of something, though of what, this perplexed pecker's unsure. Being good talk-radio jocks, Liddy & Hill instantly went to town on Goldwater's statement, playing it over and over, and scratching their heads over Goldwater's blunder.

Like the gift that keeps on giving, Dimwit Don called in yet again the following day, even more belligerent this time, informing the pair that he'd just learned from Mason's former Senate boss that Goldwater really wasn't responsible for Mason's getting canned.

"The record's been corrected," growled Goldwater. "So knock it off."

Goldwater took aim at Munsil supporter Liddy. But both Liddy & Hill gave as good as they got, with Liddy ending the segment by telling Goldwater he needed to clean house.

And all this because Tracy and Len Munsil did the wild thing before wedlock. So far, the push-poll's meant moola in Munsil's pocket and egg on Goldwater's face. Now, who's supposed to be the victim, again? Kinda makes you wonder, don't it?

Gay Munchies

This metrosexual magpie has always prided itself on its gay-dar, but for all the feathers on its backside, it can't figure out how Senator John McCain really feels about the love that dare not speak its name.

At times, McCain's practically been a charter member of the Log Cabin Republicans, voting twice in the past two years against a U.S. Constitutional amendment banning same-sex marriages.

But that's on the federal level. Locally, he has come out, so to speak, in favor of Prop 107, the state gay-marriage ban, which also denies domestic-partnership benefits to thousands of Arizonans, both gay and straight. And on September 6, just days before the primary, McCain endorsed the wing-nutty Len Munsil, who all but wants gays to start wearing pink triangles again, like back in the Shoah.

Could be McCain's covering his kahuna, making sure he's square with the GOP's archconservative base before his run for the presidential nomination in '08. Surely, in his heart of hearts, he has no problem with those who'd prefer a Gay Old Party over a Grand Old one? Hmm, after all, he is ex-Navy.

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