Bad Revues

For your commiseration

I am bitter, it's true. I can muster no other response after having lost so many hours of my life to watching pop tunes mashed together to form a "story." I am bitter. Bitter and fearful — of the inevitable Bananarama musical; of opening the New York Times and seeing an ad for You Make Me Feel Like Dancin': The Music of Leo Sayer, or Too Shy! A Song Celebration of Kajagoogoo, or MMMBop: The Hanson Songbook. Terrified of falling asleep and dreaming of Oh, Mickey!, a book musical about the misadventures of a saucy teenaged cheerleader set to the tunes of Toni Basil.

The water stain is small, and shaped a little bit like Latvia . . .

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