Its a matter easily resolved these days, Its called a paternity test.I think its a scam, but roll the dice and give the child the dna test and see how it comes out in the wash........
By Monica Alonzo
By Ray Stern
By New Times Staff
By Stephen Lemons
By Chris Parker
By Monica Alonzo
By Stephen Lemons
By Robrt L. Pela
Little Marshall Soto is glued to the TV this Friday morning in his dad's modest home just outside of Sells, Arizona, capital of the Native American Tohono O'odham Nation. He's not watching cartoons or Sesame Street or some new kids' show on Nickelodeon. Instead, he's focused on the image of a white hearse approaching a Baptist church in the Bahamas.
He looks up wide-eyed to his father, Johnny Soto, seated on a couch behind him. "Je'e?" the boy asks plaintively in his native tongue. Je'e means "Mother" in O'odham.
"Yes, mo'okwad," the child's dad replies sadly, using his pet name for the boy, meaning "tadpole." Johnny Soto then whispers something quick in O'odham, and Marshall turns back to the television, tears filling his blue-black eyes.
"I want mama je'e," he cries, as the news channel shows a mahogany coffin draped in pink, rhinestone-encrusted satin being removed from the hearse by pallbearers. "Mama je'e, is she in the box?"
"Mama je'e went to heaven, mo'okwad," Soto gently informs his son. "Mama je'e watches us from the sky. Like Peanut," he says, referring to a family dog attacked and eaten by a pack of coyotes months back.
"Peanut went bye-bye," the 5-year-old mutters, sniffling.
"Mama je'e is with Peanut now; they're playing together on the clouds," Soto tells the light-skinned, dark-haired boy, who favors his mother a little. "One day we go play with them too."
"Can we go and play now?" wonders Marshall.
"No, not now, mo'okwad," Soto says, beginning to cry himself, hiding his face in his hands. "You stay with 'o:gi [father, pronounced "awk" in O'odham] now. Your 'o:gi needs you."
Marshall runs to his dad, jumping up to embrace him on the couch, as they weep together. On the TV, the news switches from a helicopter shot of the funeral to video of Anna Nicole Smith in her platinum prime, throwing kisses to paparazzi, then a shot of her splayed out on a bed, then footage from her 2002 E! The Anna Nicole Show where she's much heavier than in the rest.
Since the tabloid goddess collapsed in her hotel room at the posh Seminole Hard Rock Hotel and Casino in Hollywood, Florida, dying of causes still unknown as this article goes to print, the world has been riveted by the fight over her corpse, her daughter Dannielynn, and the potential half-billion-dollar bequest from the estate of J. Howard Marshall II. That's the Texas oil tycoon whom the former stripper wedded sans pre-nup in 1994, when the very senior citizen was a wheelchair-bound 89 and Smith was a 26-year-old Playboy Playmate of the Year. From the day her husband expired, about 14 months after their nuptials, Smith had been battling for her share of the old man's billion-dollar fortune.
Now that Smith has been laid to rest in the Bahamas, the war for custody of her infant daughter rages on, with Smith lawyer/confidant Howard K. Stern, her mother, Virgie Arthur, Smith boy-toy Larry Birkhead, and a number of other potential Dannielynn dads such as onetime Smith bodyguard Alex Denk, erstwhile boyfriend Mark Hatten, and Zsa Zsa Gabor's spouse, Prince Frederic von Anhalt all putting in their claim for the billion-dollar Dannielynn lottery ticket.
Smith's eldest child, Daniel, overdosed last fall at age 20 from a lethal mixture of antidepressant meds and methadone. Hypothetically, this would leave his sister, born just days before Daniel OD'd, sole heir to the Smith-Marshall millions. But now Johnny Soto and his son are poised to throw yet another monkey wrench into the surreal soap opera of Anna Nicole Smith's life and post mortem. According to Soto, his son is the result of a torrid love affair between himself and the 42DD femme fatale in early 2001, while Smith was vacationing at Paradise Valley's Sanctuary Resort and Spa. He has the birth certificate and other documents to prove it. If they hold up in court, and he's able to establish little Marshall's lineage through DNA, Soto, his son, and the entire Tohono O'odham tribe stand to cash in big time.
Indeed, little Marshall (named for Anna's dead oil-magnate hubby) may well become one of the wealthiest trust-fund kids in history. Even though, right now, all the tyke wants is for his pretty white mother to rise from the grave and take him in her arms.
"Don't worry, 'o:gi," promises the child. "I won't go to heaven 'til you come with me."
"Ay, Marshall," Soto sighs, kissing the boy. "What would 'o:gi do without you?"
Johnny Soto's a tall, ruggedly handsome man in his mid-thirties, with copper skin and jet-black hair, and the way he tells it, in his slow, laconic manner of speaking, it was Anna Nicole Smith who seduced him, not the other way around.
"She'd never slept with anyone who wasn't white before," explains Soto. "That's what she told me. She had what we call 'scarlet fever' [when an Anglo falls for a Native American man or woman]. When an Indian man goes for a white woman, it's called 'eating at the white man's trough.'"
Soto had fled a life of poverty and misery on the rez when he was 18 to join the U.S. Army, a move that led to his service in the first Iraq War as a gunnery sergeant, and a Bronze Star for valor when he carried a wounded member of his platoon to safety after they were ambushed by an Iraqi sniper patrol. Honorably discharged in 1993, he refused to return to the Tohono O'odham Nation, the second-largest reservation in the United States, which sprawls across the Mexican border and is nearly the size of Connecticut. His mother died when he was younger, after having both legs amputated because of diabetes. And while he was stationed in Kuwait, his father, an alcoholic, had died of alcohol poisoning after a weekend guzzling 12 bottles of pine-scented Lysol floor cleaner.
Its a matter easily resolved these days, Its called a paternity test.I think its a scam, but roll the dice and give the child the dna test and see how it comes out in the wash........
Alright!!!! I started to read this story and well I'm am Tohono O'Odham and this is a bunch of SHIT!! I don't know where to begin. I'm disgusted that this person claims to be O'Odham. Second, looking at the birth certifcate Ana would never use Smith on any legal document. She uses for real name. And if you don't know that you are a DUMB ASS!
Hey,Johnny,you should prepair allegal papers for your son,he is adorable,he looks like anna so be preparing the way for when,he turns 18 he will know what to do and remember he got a grama she will be happy to help you virgie is a nice woman, and imaging a grandson annas son,virgie is not the badwoman like every body say,Gramas always wants the best for grand children,some day your son is going to say !hey daddy thanks so much,youare the best daddy in the world!!I am a grama,every day my grand children say grama I love you!!and I love itI lovem more more every day!!your son got grampas,FAMILY!!Their aliveimaging telling your son your grampas are coming for dinner,they coming to meet you you got grampas!he needs to be loved, mamas parents,he feels lonely now,if he doesnt have momys love,he could have gramas love,they can visit,he got you,but been loved from grampas is the best,dont bee so lonely Johny,you look so sad in the picture your son too,I will pray for you and your handsom son like his daddy!recive my Blessings!
I understand your plight Johnny and I believe every word written here, but write her off and her money too. Marry a good woman and raise your son with the values that eluded Anna Nicole. Your young man may have a bright and beautiful future ahead of him and having Anna Nicole Smith for a mother is an albatross that may be hard to deal with. Since this "who's the father" thing started, I have often wondered if anyone gave thought as to what they were doing to Dannilynns future. Forget her and move on. You and your precious son will be in my prayers for a long time to come. Choose the path that an honorable Indian would choose. A White Grandmother
At least Anna had taste, she wanted a real man, not none of the white essembly-line men that you simple, small minded white folks always look for. And what do you mean "she's a Ho"? you known damm well that if you had the chance, you would F&(% her.
I would like to comment to every one who is getting worked up over this hoax or if you prefer "true story" it is so rediculous you aren't going to benefit from any this and it won't affect your life, however I feel for the comment from the person who wrote she was humiliated by the insensetive white people her daughter was exposed to. I to was in a similar situation and it does make you very upset sorry you both were put in that situation just for the laughs and entertainment of other people.
A few simple questions came to mind straight away, such as why would Anna Nicole put her Celebrity name on a birth certificate, especially if it were a certificate of a child she needed to hide ?
Her real name would have drawn a lot less attention to such a deed.
The certificate shows the fathers signature, but is conveniently cut off at the point of Anna Nicole's signature.
It is a known fact Anna Nicole and Howard K Stern hardly ever paid any of their bills, but Anna would fork out $ 10.000.00 a month for someone to keep a child in baby formula and diapers and faithfully keep this up until her death ?
Howard K Stern was in Annas face 24/7, how could she possibly have hidden a pregnancy from him until one month before she was due, I am sure even Howard K Stern can tell the difference between an obese woman and a pregnant one !
If Johnny Soto would have a box full of letters, receipts, Airline tickets and other proof of his association with Anna Nicole, some of it would have been included in this article to strengthen the story.
If Anna Nicole was a racist she must have just recently lost her prejudice in that area as she was photographed in bed with Bahamas Immigration Minister Gibson, but then again Johnny Soto wasn't going to provide her with a visa for anything (!!).
Last but not least, even if Johnny Soto's story is a hoax, it is still a lot more credible than Howard K. Sterns claim on paternity of Dannielynn.
I was in Phoenix on the day your hoax article appeared in the PNT. I am Native and I was riding the valley metro around town with my daughter. White people on the bus were reading the hateful racial slurs you included in your funny, funny hoax out loud and snickering at them. A group of gay white men and the bus found them particularly funny and repeated the hateful slurs over and over again. Do you have a conscience? Do you care that my daughter and I were humiliated and degraded by these completely unnecessary racial slurs? What was the purpose of printing such hate against an oppressed people? Why was Steve Lemons allowed to �make fun� of the Anna Nicole coverage by directing hate speech at Native people? I guess I shouldn't be surprised by an ignorant racist white male who that thinks it's O.K. to use slurs like �Injun� when you disagree with the political positions of a powerless and voiceless group of people that his ancestors stole everything from. This is not the first time that Lemmons has engaged in this type of racist behavior. You should be ashamed of yourself for allowing this racist to use this type of hate speech to perpetuate a hoax. When will the PNT learn to treat Natives like human beings?
I "did" really like reading your publication. However I'm so focused on taking in information. I read the Anna Nichole comic like a NFL Safety reading a draw play. You sucked me in and went long. My Bad for being so focused. Need to stick with stuff that's on point.
Mr. Soto is pretty judgmental for a man who used the reservation to keep a woman from her child, a taboo in any country. Now that she is dead, he wants everyone to know that she is the mother of his child? Ohhhhhhh, its about the money!!!!!!!! Im not impressed with Anna Nicole either but this man has no right to point any fingers. Look at the details he goes into. A gentleman never kisses and tells,,,,,, or at least saves it for his attorney. Mr. Soto, you wanted your son protected and raised by the reservation so you need to just stay there. Have you ever heard the expression "you cannot have your cake and eat it to"? Perhaps he is hitting the Jack Daniels a little to hard or he may be telling the truth.
ANNA NICOLE WAS ONE FINE ASS HO. SOTO WAS A DANG LUCKY INJUN TO GET TO HIT THAT BOOTY. THREE WEEKS? I'D SPEND THREE YEARS BETWEEN HER THIGHS!!!!
It doesn't make sense: John supposedly received $10,000 dollars a month ($120,000 per year) from 2002 until February 2007, yet he and the boy "had savings but were afraid to burn it all up on a trip to the Bahamas". They article's pictures also show a very simple home on the reservation, and little Marshall's room is also very simple, no elaborate toys or furnishings. If money wasn't being spent around the home, there should have been more than enough savings to take a trip to the Bahamas! I think the only money that was given was from the New Times to the man and boy models to pose for this spoof! Not that I don't think Anna Nicole was dimwitted enough to have said all the inane comments attributed to her. She certainly was! But that doesn't mean it happened. And would a resort maintenance guy really call in sick and stay on the property? And a fat Anna Nicole trying to seduce him in a casino restroom? Please! Someone would have definitely noticed them going into the bathroom and it would have been splashed across the papers, including the New Times!But, it was a wildly entertaining story, and the guy posing as "John Soto" is a hottie!!! Hmmm....which casino was that again? And do we sneak into the ladies' room or the men's room?
I don't even want to comment on the story but I do agree with #91.If you are a heir you have more rights then a spouse and most times the child or children have to wait until they are 18 or legal age to inherirt said monies.The guardian that is looking after the child can withdraw funds only for that childs needs and needs to show all reasons why the funds are needed.I know this for a fact because I'am a widow and my daughter got her father's estate when she turned 18.I think it is really cruel how so many people are slandering this poor women PLEASE if your life is without sin then I would "SHUT THE HELL UP".Bless you Anna&Daniel and GOD BLESS Dannielynn that she will someday hear all the great things her mom was and noone loved her more then ANNA.
Satire, anyone?? You can't tell me that New Times readers aren't also familiar with the Onion. Come on! And hey, biology majors. Didn't Anna have brown eyes? Don't the majority of Native Americans have dark eyes? How'd this kid get recessive blue ones? Hmmm...Lol.
FAKED ARTICLES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!Phx NewTimes�.You can never be trusted again.All of those Arpaio articles and other �reporting� is now suspect. You shouldn�t mess with your readers like that. Very irresponsible of you.
I just want to state that I am a member of the Tohono O'odham Nation and the story is funny but sounds factual. Je'e-what little Marshall calls his mom, is indeed "Mother" in my tribe's language. Himdag-what Soto says he wants his son to learn is translated "Culture" in our language as well. The picture of the house in the desert with a mesquite tree standing near it looks familiar, as I too was raised on the reservation. I was giggling that this Native man got into this ordeal. He just adds extra spice to Anna's dramatic lifestyle. He must be a half-breed because he doesn't look full Tohono O'odham. I assume his other race must be white. The little boy probably has little Native American blood in him and the little boy probably looks white more than Native as a result of this. Nevertheless, I wish good luck to the man and his child. No matter their race, they deserve some financial help. He's a single parent for pete's sake. Give the man some support.
It is very possible for her son to have blue eyes and dark hair, fair skin. I am 1/2 Native American. My dad is dark skin and dark hair and eyes. My mother has blue eyes light brown hair and is of German decent. I have green eyes and white blonde hair with fair skin. I do have Native american features in my facial sturecture. My sisters are very different from myself. Both have dark brown eyes. One has fair skin and brown hair. The other one has olive skin and light blonde hair. So, how about that? It definativly could be Anna Nicole's son. I think that the guy is being protected in the tribal land and under its laws...Smart guy.
Mr.Soto,If I would be you try the Nancy Grace show, Court Tv. , bt I would not go to Entertainment Tonight . That is Howard K. Stern's buddy. The editor of this paper should know who to put you in touch with .I am surprised no attorney has made contact with you. I wish you and your son well.
Dear Mr. Soto:I have never written a 'fan' letter of any type before; however, I must tell you that you have a beautiful son. Please please take care of your own sobriety. As a native American myself, I know how important our own spiritual life is. Bless you.
My sister and I just happened to be watching an old episode from "The Anna Nicole Show" last night. And way back in 2002, Anna said, on national television, "I fucked a guy for 3 weeks once." I think the whole story is true now. Things that make you go "Hmmmmm"! (FYI: Season 1, Disc 3, the episode about her dating someone.)
I DID MY BEST AND MENTIONED THIS STORY TO FOX10 NEWS, HOPEFULLY THIS STORY PICKS UP PRESS, AND MARSHALL SOTO, GETS WHATS HIS, JUST HOPE THIS IS REALLY ANNA'S CHILD. ALL MY PRAYERS ARE WIHT YOU.
In response to the previous comment, how does this idiot come off looking cool? And what kind of parent would put their child in a newspaper to be ridiculed by others? Poor Kid!
lighten up everyone...............it was a joke! and a hilarious one at that....god....i can't stand that everyone is always whining about racism. kudo's to new times for drawing national attention to them once again. you don't have to apologize to anyone. and whoever that little boy is, he is hella cute
I disagree w/Janice. In the article, it's Anna Nicole who's borderline racist, and the Indian guy comes off looking pretty cool by comparison. So, what, is the writer racist against big, fat, rich white hos? Gimme a break! Plus, this was all fiction. Are you saying fictional characters can't espouse non-PC views? That's dumb.
First of all the kid was not an actor. The kid is one of the paper's employee's children, as reported to Inside Edition by the reporter. As for me being responsible for bringing the cameras to the rez, I wish I had such power! No stitches in my ass. I simply have a problem with the "creative writing" this reporter did, offering it as truth, and quoting racist remarks allegedly made by someone. I can accept jokes, but this went a little overboard!
Janice, try on a sense of humor XXXL. This was a classic New Times parody. It was satire, Janice... Ever heard of Swift or The Onion or SNL or Mad Magazine? Doubt it, in your case. The Inside Edition dumbo didn't get it either, so don't feel bad. Wasn't it funny that the New Times satire was obviously meant to make fun of tabloid idiots like Jimbo and there he was shaking his finger at New Times. Jimbo, it was you who brought a camera crew over to the desert in search of Johnny Soto. Fool, you'd still be crawling around on the rez in South AZ if the NT reporter hadn't 'fessed up. Come on, Janice, save your PC bullshit. The kid was prolly an actor. Take the stitches outta your butt, girl, and loosen up.
I am so tired of the rumors, the lies, the hoopla. Let's get to the truth. I am Anna Nicole's love child, and my father is either Dick Cheney or James Earl Jones (Mom said they were both in the room at the time).
Uh, wait, some trucks have pulled out front---oh shit, it is the TV tabloids pulling up to break the story. Gotta run.
*****************Hey Tatum, keep up the good work. And don't take any more crap from those Inside Edition Folks. They are idiots. Didn't they get it was a satirical farce--or was that totally lost on them?
AND The cocky reporter says on Inside Edition the following "Incredibly, the newspaper's editor admitted the story was totally false. "Our aim was to sort of make fun of all the Anna Nicole Smith coverage, you know, just the mania over that," he said." INSTEAD You poked fun at the tibe and Native Americans in general. Had it been true, someone would have made a fuss about exploiting the little kid like that. Perhaps a complaint should be filed with the proper agencies for them doing the same to that kid. Besides.........ROFLMAO that kid is not good looking enough to an Indian!
Well after seeing Inside Edition today, the cockey reporter that wrote the article is a total ass! He is right, people want to believe this stuff. HOWEVER, this reporter and the paper owe the TO Nation a written and public apology for their hoax! The reporter and this paper slammed Native Americans in general and accused Anna Nicole Smith of saying some horrible RACIST remarks! SO TECHNICALLY, THIS REPORTER AND THIS PAPER ARE BUNCH OF RACIST PIGS! They ought to be sued for slander to the TO tribe!
What an unbelievable story. First of all, any one who claims to be full blooded native from Sells Arizona do not look like the man in the picture. He is not FULL blooded. They have dark colored skin, love handles from all them beans and popovers. I know first hand on alcoholism on reservation and the choice of drink next to Natural Ice is not Pine-Sol. It is cough syrup and mouthwash, Easily obtainable, along with hairspray that the spray into a plastic bag and then mix that with kool-aid or water, aka Ocean Water. Second, a gunnery sergent is a position in the Marines and not the Army. Third, Housing on the rezervations do not have clean yards, they are full of junk cars, toys, old appliences, like in my yard. Fourth, I don't think that Mr. Soto would be living in a run down house when he could afford to live in the city. Nice neighborhood. If he was getting all that money as he's claiming. I live on the rez, single parent of 3, decent paying job that allows us to live off a $2,500.00 monthly that covers bills and some. You can live on the rez, any rez for very cheap. He should have alot of money, or is he spending it all on Jack Daniels and if he was drinking to deal with the lost of his love, He sure as hell would not look like the clean cut shaven handsome man in them photos. And if he claims to be a traditionally religous, he shouldn't have to turn to booze to cope with ANS death. So I think this is all b/s. The opinion of one Native American who has Traditional beliefs and lives in the heart of Indian Country.
Can't everyone see this an early April Fool's Joke that New Times is famous for? Apparently not. Very funny!
I agree that he does not look Native American in anyway, especially not T.O.Look at his features, what native guy out there has a beard?? Unless of course he's not full like he claims to be. He's a Fraud! Plain & Simple. Probably one of those white people who always claims that he's part indian say, Cherokee *LOL*
Johnny Soto is too ugly to be a Native person, us Natives are beautiful people and its a shame he is trying to act like he is from the Tohono Oodham tribe. He looks white to me. Anyone agree?
Again, this Johnny Soto guy claims to be full-blooded Native American *chokes with laughter* You really believe this crock of lies? Anybody can see he looks like someone who clearly pulled off of an online ad. And the picture with him holding the bottle of whiskey looks too fake. Looks likes someone who's craving attention. Again, I still think this is a hoax, wouldn't this have reached national headlines or the tabloids by now?P/S: The wardance was something else, interesting though *LOL*
I think Soto is exagerating Anna's 'whiteness' and alleged racism. Soto didn't mention that Anna Nicole was part-Blackfoot Indian. She spoke of it during her reality show. If I'm remembering correctly, it was a great-grandmother that was Indian.
Hey #129, so you don't get the point, it's just like what you are saying: The boy's hair must be fair - brighter color, like your daughter's (coz Anna's hair was very blond), and his eyes must be blue-hazel like your daughter's, like or a little bit darker than Anna's if Anna had blue eyes and Johnny had dark ones. But in the pic, the boy's eyes are even brighter than Anna's ... impossible !
Sounds like someone's got a pretty active imagination.Produce the goods, the letters, the money transfers,the DNA of the child.
#129 needs to buy herself a sense of humor, size XXL. If the article is one of the New Times'April Fools Day gags, it's no worse than what you'd see on MAD TV, SNL, the Comedy channel, or in movies like "White Chicks" or others. Seems like the whole point is to skewer stereotypes and the worship of celebs, so get a grip. I'm married to a woman who's part Cherokee and she thought it was hilarious.
Even as a joke this article is disgusting and offensive. To perpetuate those kinds of stereotypes about Native people is NOT funny. Imagine if the father had been Black or Jewish and they used *those* kinds of stereotypes instead. No one would be laughing. They'd be up in arms and calling it horrible. This kind of racism is not funny expressly for the reason that stupid people BELIEVE IT.
Nor do I think it's funny to attribute racism to a dead woman who can't defend herself, or to use a real child in a fake story.
Also- 127/Baby, you're wrong. I am a full-blooded Native American and my husband is a blonde haired, blue eyed Irishman (from Ireland). We have four children and they range widely in skin, eye, and hair colors. My youngest daughter is tan like me, but with fair hair and beautiful blue-hazel eyes. Please learn about real genetics (and not that middle-school Mendel squares kiddy stuff, either) before you make a fool of yourself. If this story weren't so ridiculously outlandish and racist, it would be quite possible that that little boy could be ANS's.
Right, this damn bitch fucked everybodies of all kinds, all colors, all class ... for all purposes ... no doubt.But the story has details to sounds like hoax, for exp, like someother said: - Where is even 1 pic of the boy together with his father, with ANS ...- That Johnny is hard to be believed a full blooded Indian.
IN ADDITION: (I have mix-blooded kids, I know these facts) - The boy's eyes are too blue to be Anna' son plus if the father's eyes are that dark color. While his hair is too dark to be that blonded Anna's son, too. - The Indian described himself in the story like he had very dark skin, but he doesn't look like that in pics .....
C'mon, people. Go back and read the quotes attributed to this man. Nobody talks like that in real life! This is just an example of creative writing!
New Times, your humor outdoes itself. I like the fact you keep us on our toes. I like the fact that silly people will read this stuff and believe it true. Funny stuff. The satire is thick. The story line is hysterical. So many "tells". So fake.
Thanks for making me laugh. Cant wait to see what silly ass reporter "reports" this article as true. DOOOPED again! Keep 'em coming New Times.
Gotta go.....my taxidermied mother is falling over....
I didn't read ALL the comments... but am I the only one that noticed that there was no actual picture of the "dad" and the child together??? Why do the dad's pics look like they came off of an online dating ad and the pics of the boy are generic.... notice the one of him watching the funeral... can't see his face.
I also find it very difficult to believe that the "tabloids" would not have caught wind of a Anna's pregnancy.
Until I see/hear that a DNA test proves this (very adorable) little boy is Anna's... I call BULLSHIT also.
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