Caged Heat

Michael Ratcliff


Pig points: Sunken bar, graffiti-it-up (turns out they do offer free Sharpie pens at the bar), party cage — great place to hook up with a woman while her husband is in jail. (Hey, let a pig have his fantasy.)
Pig Shit: No condom machine. Women shouldn’t go alone. Ever.
Well: $2.50
Call: $3-$3.25
8-ounce draft: $1.00
Bottles: $2.50
Hours: 8 a.m. to 2 a.m. every day of the year!
Think Booze Pig blows? Want to tip him? Contact him at »e-mail link.
Jake's-O-Mine, 1985 West Apache Trail, Apache Junction

The tab with the barkeep is $110, and I offer her a $35 tip if she can tell me whether there's anyone named Rod around here. She tilts her head to the side like a puppy, then calls us a cab. I stumble outside to meet the crew, and it is clear from the looks of the guest pigs that this place is guaranteed to make you feel like a genuine Piece-O-Shit, and, well, sometimes that is exactly what one needs to feel when saying goodbye.

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Cathy Knotts
Cathy Knotts

I don't doubt that you felt like a "genuine piece-O-shit" and probably do quite often; although probably not as often as you should if you hand out many of the "last night when I was slumming comments" with the "I'm way to good for this place\these people" attitude usually reserved for pompous ass-wipes who are their own best friend{because NOBODY else will even admit to knowing them}

nancy reagan
nancy reagan

i once fucked alex cobb so hard his legs came off.

Alex Cobb
Alex Cobb

Nice work, Pig. I enjoy the articles. I think Rod is actually an acronym for Robert of Dalton. It would certainly explain the "suck us all" sentiment.

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