The Bird covers the waterfront on Sheriff Arpaio’s racial profiling patrols and demands freedom for First Friday bohos

Someone must've spiked Mayor Phil Gordon's Froot Loops with testosterone. How else to explain the previously 'nad-less Hizzoner, lambasting Sheriff Joe Arpaio at the big César Chávez luncheon downtown?

Like a Jack Russell terrier sinking its teeth into a grizzled ol' bulldog, Phil laid into Sheriff Joe over Arpaio's latest bout of domestic terrorism near Bell and Cave Creek roads. That's where the MCSO set up its racial-profiling command post, and nearly incited a riot in the process when the Hispanic community showed up in force to badger the hell outta immigrant-hunting deputies and their hillbilly-esque supporters.

Phil's verbal dive-bomb came after night one of Arpaio's raids, with night two and the threat of racial violence to come.

"[The sheriff] announced that his 200 volunteer posse members would be migrating north to crack down on illegal aliens," Phil intoned, later adding, "He says he's doing this because 10 business owners — including a pawn shop and a biker store — asked him to. And who helped circulate those 10 signatures to deliver to the sheriff? A self-described neo-Nazi."

Actually, only eight businesses out of the hundreds along Bell Road signed the petition. And as this wacky warbler revealed in last week's column ("Resident Evil," March 27), it was alleged public urinator Buffalo Rick Galeener, of the ultra-racist hate group United for a Sovereign America, who passed around the letter asking Joe to invade the neighborhood.

U.S.A. has accepted neo-Nazis into its ranks. Galeener's not one of them, though he is a foul-mouthed bigot who refers to nonwhites as "monkeys." Phil was correct in spirit, though. He faulted Nickel Bag Joe for setting the stage for "shouting matches, confrontations or worse," and he contrasted Joe's collars for cracked windshields and busted tail lights to a recent anti-gang operation by the Phoenix Police Department that nabbed 42 gang-bangers on 562 felony counts.

"If [the sheriff] really wants to fight crime," advised Phil, "he should start rounding up dangerous criminals who have outstanding felony warrants . . . There are thousands of outstanding warrants in this county. How long are those going to stay piled up on his desk?"

Phil called Joe out like a man, and no doubt the sheriff's Selective Enforcement Unit is already investigating the mayor, as it does with all Joe's enemies. That's one reason every pol — from Governor Janet Napolitano to Attorney General Terry Goddard — is petrified of going after the Valley's version of J. Edgar Hoover, minus the frilly undergarments (we think).

True, Gordon caved to right-wing pressure on the revamping of Operations Order 1.4.3, which did not need to be revamped. And Gordon, a nominal Dem, effed up by endorsing wing-nutter Andrew Thomas for county attorney and Sheriff Joe for re-election in 2004.

Still, Sand Land's damn dry when it comes to political courage. We need every ounce we can wring from our leaders. Gordon did the right thing in speaking out as he saw Arpaio traipsing toward a race war. The Bird can only hope Phil's intestinal fortitude will be long-lasting, and contagious to his peers. Are you listening, county Supes?!

287G-MEN

Did you know that the Government Accountability Office, the investigative arm of the U.S. Congress, is looking into Arpaio's 287g agreement with Immigration and Customs Enforcement? That 287g agreement is the one allowing specially trained MCSO deputies to enforce federal immigration law under certain circumstances. People are wondering whether Arpaio is in violation of the agreement, especially those immigrant rights supporters with whom the GAO's spoken.

Several local Latino activists were contacted by the GAO, including legal beagle Danny Ortega and Somos America leader Hector Yturralde. The GAO solicited their views of Joe's use of 287g-trained officers for politically motivated sweeps like last week's Bell Road bungle. Joe's critics have given the government investigators an earful about Joe's use of non-ICE-trained posse members in these dragnets, and his penchant for going after petty crimes as a means to nab the undocumented.

Joe himself admitted such an inquiry was under way when this persnickety parakeet spoke to him during a press conference inaugurating the disastrous Bell Road operation.

"The only thing I'm going to tell you is that we've had people who've come here, and they love the program," Arpaio assured this avian.

Joe's flunky Paul "Chicken Little" Chagolla then stepped between the sheriff and this beak-bearer, hastily ordering, "Get ahold of the GOA [sic]. That's enough!"

Gee, Paul, why so testy? At least get your acronyms right if you want folks to think you actually know what you're doing.

The nutty nightingale rang the GAO and spoke to flack Chuck Young, who denied the federal agency's calls were part of a direct inquiry into our corrupt top cop.

"GAO is responding to a congressional request [from the House Homeland Security Committee] to look at the 287g program, and we are doing so in 29 different state and local jurisdictions across the nation," Young informed this yard bird. "We have been and will continue to speak with a wide range of stakeholders as part of our research efforts for this report."

That sounds awfully broad. But one of those contacted by the GAO, who did not wish to be named, insisted that the agency was, indeed, interested in Arpaio's alleged abrogation of the 287g agreement.