Welch points to a three-week-old tattoo on his left eye. "It's music notes dropping out of my eye. That's my calling," Welch says.
To his credit, Welch's new lyrics aren't predictable or didactic. They certainly don't sound like a primer in any religion. The song "It's Time to See Religion Die" growls, "I testify/It's time to see religion die/The truth can't lie/It's time to see religion die . . ."
Alonso Murillo
Brian Welch
Alonso Murillo
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From "Rebel," a teen angst tune:
Rebel! Reeeeebel!
Your parents have failed you and I'm here to tell you
Rebel! Reeeeeebel!
The world has abused you and I'm here to choose you!
In the song "Save Me from Myself," Welch calls for God to save him, but only after he sings, "Chop it, snort it/The kid? Ignore it/Life sucks, I'm over it/Save me from myself/Can't quit, I tried."
In a sense, that song brings Welch full circle. He co-wrote similar lyrics about trying to quit meth 15 years ago in the song "Helmet in the Bush," on Korn's debut album. But Welch is on the other side of addiction now.
Welch's first book faced the same dual-market quandary. The hardcover version of Save Me from Myself jumped to number 15 on the New York Times bestseller list last July. After about 65,000 copies sold (at $29.95 each), sales tapered off. Youth pastors and Christian parents who were initially excited about the book became upset when they read the swear words and graphic descriptions of Welch's past.
HarperCollins publicist Suzanne Wickham says the publisher hopes to key in on those readers with Welch's new book, Washed by Blood. Wickham says it's the version she would want her teenage daughter to read.
The new book could be titled, Washed by 21st-Century American Christian Marketing. It's the original story, purged of the curse words and darkest scenes. Youth pastors can recommend the new version to their kids, without riling their parents. The new version even comes with a study guide for youth groups.
Welch, who still collects $40,000 to $60,000 a year in royalties from Korn's pre-2006 work, is neither wealthy nor impoverished these days. He says he's given away most of his savings and that he's not too concerned about the money to be made from his books or new album. He seems sincere about it, too.
"[God] is the one who provides for me now. I don't look to this world's system as my source of provision any more," Welch says in the studio green room, after a mixing session.
"I had $3 million in cash sitting in the bank, all the cars I wanted, a $200,000 pool, nannies, the nicest house, real estate in California. I was miserable. Then I found God and was, like, 'This is all I've ever wanted.' I didn't find what I was looking for in all that stuff."
Welch makes dinner most evenings. (Jennea's favorites include meatloaf, spaghetti, and quesadillas.) He does not have a glass of wine with dinner, or ever. "I just have an addictive personality," he says.
He agrees that he has channeled his addictive tendencies into Jesus and music. Welch does say he has one other addiction, which he claims is under control. "I love those real-life crime shows, like The First 48. When I watch it, I'm so thankful, 'cause I could have ended up like these people."
Water has been a big part of Welch's life, too. from his poolside introduction to meth at age 14 to his $200,000 pool during Korn to his baptism in the Jordan River. So, yes, Welch has a decent pool at his Phoenix-area home, albeit not a $200,000 one. Some nights, he and Jennea swim together to unwind.
"He laughs like he won the lottery. He didn't used to be like that," Phil Welch says of Brian before and after. "All the changes since his conversion have been positive. He's much more outgoing. He's come out of his shell. He wants to help people now. That's very different."
Music critics, TV news personalities, fans, and rock stars have all tried to sum up Welch's eccentric journey these past three years.
Jennea is the only one who's been with him through it all. She probably sums it up best: "He got funnier."
