Tour de Phat

Bikes, costumes, and a parade. What more could one ask for? How about beer, circus acts, and live music? Heck, yes. Tour de Fat has all of this covered, and Tempe has been chosen as one of the eleven cities to which the Tour will spread its cycling gospel.

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Fat’s first commandment hails the importance of bikes as they “help stave off some of our most wicked ills: Traffic, obesity, and pollution,” which means that you should get off your sack o’ lard and live up to your inner activist. Do so at 9 a.m. Saturday, October 11, when registration begins for the bike parade at Tempe Beach Park. For all you morning masturbators, come by later to catch the Squirm Burpee Circus and live performances by Paperbird and the 20-plus Balkan-esque marching band Mucca Pazza.

All proceeds from beer sales will go to local non-profits and charities.