Hairy Tale

Throughout human history, wigs have benefited mankind. The ancient Egyptians donned them to shield their melons from the sunshine, France’s King Louis XIII hid his premature baldness with a hairpiece, and now Valley barflies can use them to score cheap alcohol during Wigger Wednesdays. The weird watering hole called Monkey Pants allows anyone sporting a counterfeit coiffure to nab drink specials such as $1.50 domestic pints, $2 well drinks, $2 domestic bottles, and 50 cents off premium beers. “Wigger Wednesday is [about] donning someone else’s ´do and drinking enough cheap booze that the ´do and you weld together into a persona, and taking that persona to places you could only dream,” says Monkey Pants owner Dan O’Leary. “Actually, it’s just a really great opportunity for bald guys to get laid.” Right on.
Wednesdays, 7 p.m., 2008