The night he debuts his new sword at the weekly SCA battles, he also brings a very attractive, busty brunette onto the battlefield. She's wearing a fine yellow silk top, a gam-flashing skirt, and heels. Her hair and makeup are meticulous, and she speaks with a foreign accent. Is she Rohrich's girlfriend?

The woman shifts slightly and folds her arms, boosting her ample bosom even higher. "I, um, I'm . . . one of them," she says then giggles. "One of his lady friends."

After the battles, Rohrich and Woodbury hunker down at the George & Dragon in central Phoenix. Rohrich's with his "lady friend." Woodbury's with his girlfriend, Ginger Mortis of the AZ Derby Dames' Coffin Draggers. While the guys drink beer and talk tech and armor, the ladies sit quietly beside them, smiling and occasionally rolling their eyes or giggling at the pair's battle boasting.

Rohrich and Woodbury will get medieval on your ass.
Jamie Peachey
Rohrich and Woodbury will get medieval on your ass.
Gladiator gluteus: Rohrich’s rear takes many beatings in SCA battles.
courtesy of Simon Rohrich
Gladiator gluteus: Rohrich’s rear takes many beatings in SCA battles.
Rohrich, a.k.a. Baron Josef Donnerbauch, at this year’s Estrella War.
Jamie Peachey
Rohrich, a.k.a. Baron Josef Donnerbauch, at this year’s Estrella War.
At the Estrella War, Rohrich prepares for battle.
Jamie Peachey
At the Estrella War, Rohrich prepares for battle.
Rohrich poses with Woodbury and a belly dancer.
Jamie Peachey
Rohrich poses with Woodbury and a belly dancer.
Rohrich’s ready for a melee.
Jamie Peachey
Rohrich’s ready for a melee.

"I'm still a geek," Rohrich says. "But things are changing. Now, all the hot chicks are running around in [costume play] outfits. There are all these girls with glasses and pointy ears that are built like supermodels at conventions going, 'I like video games!' And I'm like, 'Yes!'"

Rohrich smiles. "Being geeky is now very in."

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6 comments
buffalobills515
buffalobills515

Love the story. It is great to hear a fellow SCA guy doing great things in the world. I will need to put a post about this inventive warrior on my medieval blog

Dennis Ward
Dennis Ward

Simon used to work with/for me a few years ago at ValueOptions. He's a gentle giant and I'd definitely want him in my corner.Glad things are going good for you, Simon.

Simon Rohrich
Simon Rohrich

I hope you have been practicing. ;-)Thank you for the doubleedged compliment. You and you household are formidable. I do ride on my rep. I don't hurt anyone on purpose. Any injury I cause that results in financial loss I feel terrible about.

see you in two weeks,thank you in advance-Nerd of War-

BammBamm
BammBamm

Only the bravest men dare poke the bear. Let alone 2 of them. See you @ practice

Leo
Leo

Its about freaking time you guys did a story on the SCA here in Arizona and the fact that you did one about Simon shows some actual intelligence. Simon is a straight thug and the inventor of the phrase "militant geeks" Alot of the time though he rides to much on his reputation as a bone breaker. He hurts one guy a year and the rest of the year everybody in the game is like "OOOH here comes Simon and Bam BAm." But us Romans have no fear and Constantly have to show the rest of the community that he isnt that mean. Believe me though when I step on the field the first thing I do is look for Simon cause when he hits you and your not aware of it its like being struck by a runaway train. But if your ready for him he falls just like all the rest. Good luck selling your Spear Brother and remember Saterday Night at Highlands is the bucket party swing by your more then welcome LORD LEO Roman Thunder

 
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