Get a Clue

Long-term relationships are like physical and psychological endurance tests. Misunderstandings are the bane of all monogamous systems, and you have prided yourself on being able to read your partner with sensitivity. You know that those muted weeping sounds at night indicate gastrointestinal discord rather than a painful yearning for the neighbor’s presidential organ. And you understand that her refusal to climax in bed is simply proof of her humility before you and Yahweh. Love, you say, is a puzzle, and you’ve got all the pieces.

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Now that you’ve solved the riddle that is woman, why not apply your brilliant stratagems to The Great Urban Race on Saturday, February 28? In teams of two, you will solve 12 clues in a citywide scavenger hunt, with the first-place crew winning $300 and entry in the $10,000 championship in New Orleans.