Creative types hate getting their hands dirty. Oh, theyll put religious effigies in jars of piss or paint with cow dung, but ask em to pitch their art and they start mumbling to rival Ozzy Osbourne. But artists including Gregory Sale, Tania Katan, and Erin V. Sotak are so keen on shameless self-promotion that theyre doing it publicly at the Stand Up and Pimp Yourself: 5-Minute Pitches by Nine Artists Who Live in the Margins event. Each participant gets exactly 300 seconds to sell themselves, whether through a stuffy PowerPoint presentation, theatrical performance, or kickass video montage. Part of the pimping is about how you can score a john in under five minutes, quips Sotak. Meaning, how can an individual dynamically express, represent, and promote her/himself in [that time]. Even the event organizers havent seen the other artists acts, so anything can happen though Sotak says shes pretty sure therell be no live nudity and that the profanity will be strictly PG-13.