It’s Britney, Bitch

You gotta love Britney Spears and her “ventilation issues.” If she’s not flashing her hairless pudenda at grateful paparazzi while spilling out of Paris Hilton’s sports car, she’s taking an unscheduled 30-minute breather in the middle of a recent concert in Canada because of lingering cigarette smoke. Don’t you see? The girl’s not crazy – she just needs quality ventilation! Hopefully the folks at Jobing.com Arena will pick up on this fact when the once-troubled pop siren brings her Circus tour to town this Friday. Replete with trapeze artists, dudes in greasepaint and gilded lion cages, the show looks to be a heightened musical interpretation of a real big-top extravaganza, minus the elephant dung. Britney even has some flesh-and-blood felines to put in those lion cages: all-girl opening act The Pussycat Dolls. Supporting her chart-topping Circus LP and its two Top 10 singles – “Circus” and “Womanizer” – the 27-year-old Spears seems to have finally moved past the shorn-head/bat-shit-crazy phase of her career and settled into her new role as pop music's meltdown survivor poster child. Ventilation mania notwithstanding, Spears and her fans should breath easy.
Fri., April 24, 8 p.m., 2009