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01/30/2012 3:18:00 AM
Reading this make me laugh.. but loud.. ! how can such article .. such ridiculous article be posted in a digital NEWS paper¿? are you serious! this is the most bizarre and ridiculous thing I ever read in my life.. its a real shame that a writen media paper that is supossed to inform serious matters to people, are posting such a ...........BS like this.. Sorry but things like this are to be burned!
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Suba 01/14/2012 3:28:00 PM
This fake story is not a joke, it is a big disgrace, slandering an innocent man. You can find the necessary information about this article here:
http://vindicatemj.wordpress.com/2012/01/11/did-voodoo-kill-michael-jackson-a-sociological-study-of-the-media-and-public/#comments
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Foreigner 01/07/2012 7:04:00 PM
What superpower are you talking about?
This de Souza does not exist. It was a HOAX. And it was meant to smear Michael Jackson again.
Having fun at the expense of a dead and innocent man is a total DISGRACE.
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Demerol Addiction 04/14/2011 6:53:00 AM
I dont think that she is having any superpower
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Deelo 02/26/2011 9:25:00 PM
Wow! God gave her that super power or the devil? lmao! but seriously mental illness is not funny! A lot of mental illness in this world...
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sue 08/08/2009 5:27:00 AM
this healer chick ... what a dumb bunny.
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sue 08/08/2009 5:27:00 AM
this healer chick ... what a dumb bunny.
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HeavenTyler 08/05/2009 9:49:00 PM
May God put a curse on her life, and may it be filled with pain, heartache, and shear misery, God doesn't like evil, and for her to have the audacity to put a curse upon someone will only bite her back at the end...
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sandi 08/04/2009 1:55:00 PM
CRAZY BITCH.
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vera 07/28/2009 1:28:00 AM
People believe what they want to believe.
Pamela, if you believe in evil spells, you enable those. So, don't believe. If you have another chance to visit San Francisco, go to the Russian church on Geary str. People there pray to our true Lord Jesus Christ, son of God. There are hundreds of testimonies that the prayers are answered, so be carefull what you wish for. Talk to the Russian people selling candles, they will tell you stories and how to pray according to their Orthodox Christian faith. What you need most is faith in Lord Jesus Christ. Don't believe evil spells, because they are not doing this with the power of the true God. They are not stronger then Him. Don't enable them.
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Devoirs 07/23/2009 1:54:00 AM
MICHAEL JACKSON WILL BE GREATLY MISSED!
JACKSON WAS AN ASSET TO AMERICA!
JACKSON�S MUSIC IS SPECTACULAR!
_____________________
SCANDALS! SCANDALS! SCANDALS!
DANGER! DANGER! DANGER!
GEORGE W. BUSH IS AN EXTREMELY DANGEROUS CRIMINAL STALKER AND SERIAL KILLER!
�In her suit, Margie Schoedinger states that George W. Bush committed sexual crimes against her, organized harassment and moral pressure on her, her family members and close relatives and friends. As Schoedinger said, she was strongly recommended to keep her mouth shut. . . . Furthermore, she alleges that George Bush ordered to show pressure on her to the point, when she commits suicide� (go to Google, type �blog of drizzten Margie Schoedinger,� and hit �Enter�).
�George [Bush is personally complicit] in the death (murder to be precise) of my friend Margie Schoedinger in September of 2003. Determining the exact whereabouts and contacts of . . . George Bush on September 21 thru 22, 2003, should be entirely lacking in difficulty� (Leola McConnell�Nevada Progressive Democratic Candidate for U.S. Senate in 2010).
McConnell is correct: Bush applying pressure (continuously criminally stalking Margie Schoedinger) purposefully to force Schoedinger to commit suicide does in fact constitute murder where it culminated in her death.
Bush�s method of murdering Schoedinger cannot exist in a vacuum: he must have murdered other people in the same way.
During Bush�s presidency, of course Bush would have desired to kill people whom he hated or get them out of his way. Insofar as Bush was clearly capable of murdering Schoedinger�even in �broad daylight��and is clearly capable of getting away with it, in consideration of common sense and the laws of human nature, Bush of course murdered numerous people in the disgusting way he murdered Schoedinger. One can examine public information; in various situations where people who sought to oppose or disadvantage Bush ever so frighteningly ended up �committing suicide��specifically�Bush murdered them just like he murdered Schoedinger. For example, Bush murdered James Howard Hatfield by continuously criminally stalking Hatfield to the point that Hatfield could not get away from it�purposefully to force Hatfield to commit suicide�and Hatfield committed suicide in desperation to escape. However, the vast majority of such scandalous cases will never come out (the grisly details are typically hard to substantiate). A prosecutor really can lawfully charge a former president with murdering one or more people in the disgusting way Bush murdered Schoedinger. The American people unfortunately live in a world where evil presidents can murder any number of people�figuratively�with a wave of a magic wand and get away with it.
(There are thousands of copies of the information above on the Internet. Please feel free to go to any major search engine, type �GEORGE W. BUSH IS AN EXTREMELY DANGEROUS CRIMINAL STALKER AND SERIAL KILLER� or �George W. Bush continuously criminally stalked Margie Schoedinger to the point that she could not get away from it, and she committed suicide in desperation to escape: he murdered her� or �George W. Bush applying pressure (continuously criminally stalking Margie Schoedinger) purposefully to force Schoedinger to commit suicide does in fact constitute murder where it culminated in her death� or �George W. Bush murdered James Howard Hatfield by continuously criminally stalking Hatfield to the point that Hatfield could not get away from it�purposefully to force Hatfield to commit suicide�and Hatfield committed suicide in desperation to escape,� hit �Enter,� and readily find hundreds of copies.)
(Please feel free to go to Google, type �GEORGE W. BUSH IS THE WORST PRESIDENT IN U.S. HISTORY blog of Andrew Wang,� and hit �Enter.�)
_____________________
Andrew Wang
(a.k.a. �THE DISSEMINATING MACHINE�)
B.S., Summa Cum Laude, 1996
Messiah College, Grantham, PA
Lower Merion High School, Ardmore, PA, 1993
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Jackson 07/18/2009 7:49:00 PM
Now that Walter Cronkite has died, why doesn't the New Times write a hoax story to mock his death?
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dirk diggler 07/17/2009 6:38:00 PM
Chill Lisa. You look like an idiot with no sense of humor.
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Lisa 07/16/2009 11:55:00 PM
WHAT A BUNCH OF CRAP!!!!!!! I CAN'T BELIEVE THAT THE NEW TIMES ACTUALLY SPENT THE TIME AND MONEY ON SUCH SH*T! AND I'M SURE THAT THIS IS JUST THE BEGINNING OF MANY MORE MADE UP, OUTLANDISH STORIES WE'LL ALL BE HEARING ABOUT....IF WE WANT TO OR NOT!!!!!!!!
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Wayne (first name, not the ser 07/16/2009 10:09:00 PM
NOBODY else picked up on this line:
"But he never blanched � though it would be hard to tell if he did..."
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Bill 07/12/2009 1:50:00 PM
I think I smell another Voodoo scam like the one that was on TV years ago. Can you say I'm broke and need some $$$$.
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Chief Ironhorse 07/10/2009 3:32:00 AM
Believe what you want....Don't underestimate of the dark side. Arrogant Sons of B!tches.
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Denise 07/09/2009 10:58:00 PM
It's INSANIACS like this whack-job that give Sedona a bad reputation. True healers DON'T seek revenge for perceived slights. Anyone who had an ounce of goodness in them wouldn't want to KILL somebody for "lack of payment." And it's not like she wanted the money; she wanted the skeleton of poor Joseph Merrick. SHE'S MORE A FREAK THAN MJ WAS!!!
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Editorial Assistant 07/09/2009 6:38:00 PM
Sent to New Times via email:
Dear, Joseph Rossi
My name is Pamela Ann Holloway, and I am a writer, and an actress. I am writing you this letter because I, too may be a possible victim of Dr. Reinalda de Souza. I write action, drama, and suspense screenplays for motion picture. So, far I have written 3 screenplays. All of them are unique, and different. One is called, "Summer Tymes". Which, is based on a true story of gangster love, and the Subway Killer. To whom, you may remember some years ago in New York. It starts out with Will Smith's music, Summer Times. And, it's awesome. The second one is, Nature Lovers. Also, based on true story events of people who, video-tape animals in natural habitat. The 3rd one is Trial and Error. Which, is a story about 3 rich, and powerful Doctors who, own Fort McHenry. And, experiment on live human specimens, trial, and error drugs. These drugs have not passed the Food, and drug Administration, and are highly controversial. Some of their experiments end in disaster, and even death. 2 years ago, I was told that a rich, and powerful, evil demon cast a spell on me, and my work so that I could not make it to Hollywood, or get agents, or the help I needed to get there. Up until now, I always thought that person was a man. But now, I know it could have possibly been a female, ie: Dr. de Souza. I am currently residing in Arizona. But, before I got an apartment here, I stayed at the Watkins Women's Center. Also, known as the New Day Center for women, under the name, Pamela Babbs. On Easter Sunday which, for most is the celebration of the Resurrection of Christ, I was visited by the recent;y traded basketball superstar, Shaquille O'Neil. Who, appeared to be just doing charity work. And, up until, now, I thought the visit was co-incidental. He signed some autographs, and passed out some toys for the kids. I told him about my work, and that I needed an agent to get my work read by Paramount Pictures. I asked for his help. As, simple as a phone call, and a referral could have gotten me an Agent. I've already spoken with Paramount Pictures, and they are interested in reading my work. But, not without an Agent. He said, he didn't know if he could help me and, whispered to himself, underneath his breath, "yeah, yeah some people don't like black girls. I was devastated, and went back to my bed, still poor, and still out here, alone. I almost felt like giving up on my dreams. Until, I read your article in the Phoenix Newtimes, about the death of Superstar Michael Jackson, and his involvement with Candomble' priestess Dr. Reinalda de Souza, and voodoo, or some may put it, witchcraft. I knew then, that it wasn't a co-incidence that the recently traded basketball superstar, and one of Dr. de Souza's recent clients, Shaquille O'Neil came to see me Easter Sunday. I'm told to break the spell, I have to get one of my scripts read by Paramount Pictures. Can you help me? I desperately need your help. These people have money, and power, ie: they think of themselves as, high principalities. And, they won't stop hurting the innocent people out there. Because, so far, there's been no one to stop them. 2 of my screenplays, Summer Tymes, and Nature Lovers are registered with the Writers Guild of America, west. The 3rd is currently being rewritten, due to the fact, that it was stolen in San Francisco. The Writers Guild of America, west was contacted, and a Police report was filed with SF PD. I have enclosed a Story Outline for a quick synopsis of Nature Lovers. Please help me get one of my scripts read by Paramount Pictures to break the evil spell on my life.
Sincerely Yours,
Pamela Ann Holloway Screenplay Writer
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Editorial Assistant 07/09/2009 6:33:00 PM
Sent to New Times via email:
Dearest Mr. Rossi,
Dr. DeSouza needs to be locked up across from: DMX in tent city for murdering that 4 &1/2 month old pup! If Sherrif Joe doesn't get on her I hope the: NEW TIMES will!
She's loco la cavesa!
Why did she need these bones so bad?? Was she going to do: VOO-DOO on the elephant mans remains too?
Too nuts!
Karen
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Editorial Assistant 07/09/2009 6:32:00 PM
Sent to New Times via email:
The Sedona Humane Society has informed us that they do not find records of the dog in your article. Can you give any more information of where it was obtained or if Ms de Souza was even telling the truth.? We are not letting go of this evil in our community.
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LorisDad 07/09/2009 12:40:00 AM
\"or maybe the illegal immigrants taking work away from americans, and getting free benefits to boot...how about something that is interesting and true...stupid...\"
stoopid is right, Lori. i mean for you. illegal immigrants cant get government benefits, free or otherwise. thats a lie. so is the bs about them taking american jobs. otherwise why dont you ride your fat white ass down to the local car wash and pick up a rag.
nah, lori, its lazy americans who get the free benefits. illegals have to work their tails off once theyre here. sorry to bust your bubble.
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Lori 07/08/2009 8:21:00 PM
This story was so stupid, it was sad...is there nothing else newsworthy going on in this fucked up state...how about guns in bars...that's a doozie...or maybe the illegal immigrants taking work away from americans, and getting free benefits to boot...how about something that is interesting and true...
stupid...
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Takesonetoknowone 07/08/2009 7:30:00 PM
Speaking of Assclowns, CharlesR's a Tightassclown.
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Editorial Assistant 07/08/2009 7:10:00 PM
Sent to New Times via email:
Mr. Rossi,
I enjoyed your article on "Dr." De Souza.
Wait, I didnt. Its ironic to me that this woman flames all kinds of dead celebrities, while trying to ride their coat tails right into the grave. That woman is a crock. One can only hope that she sells the shit she's on.
name withheld
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Editorial Assistant 07/08/2009 7:09:00 PM
Sent to New Times via email:
Dear Mr. Rossi, and those who employ you,
I employ you to stop writing these types of articles (I killed Jacko, Joe's a Nazi, etc.), used solely for the purpose of getting people to read this rag. I read this occasionally, because mainly, I'm sick of reading the Republic's constant reminders of how I'm still not going to have a job next year (I'm a teacher with a Master's Degree, currently employed for a position I'm severely overqualified for at Circle K). I also like the music section, that's about it. So many people come in to my store who can't even read the sign on the door that says "use the other door, please" and pick up a copy of the New Times because of your stupidly-done, misleading shards of piss-yellow journalism you fine people call a cover. Then they happen upon the word "douchebaggery" and realize they picked up a rag written by the biggest douchebags of all. Can you write something worthwhile that will get shit accomplished, please? Why don't you use your ability to print whatever the fuck you want and use it for good? How about, let's say, write a piece that's worth reading about how teachers are being ass-fucked by the government right now? A call for action, even. I even created a cartoon or two you could use. Just write something important, not some article that's going to get some poor pyschotic holistic Sedona resident killed by some Jacko-loving nutjob. Seriously, your covers are nothing but pedestrian attention-getting pieces of shit that bring the whole paper down. By the way, are you hiring?
Willing to Work for anyone at this point,
Name With-held ( of it all)
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Editorial Assistant 07/08/2009 7:08:00 PM
Sent to New Times via email:
As concerned animal lovers of Sedona we wonder the origin of the baby rottweiler, If she got it at the local humane society we would like to know. Animal sacrifice is not an acceptable practice for animals obtained there. We will bring the article to their attention so that they will know the care she gave this victim animal.
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Editorial Assistant 07/08/2009 7:07:00 PM
Sent to New Times via email:
Dear Joe,
So, there I was, at the car wash, minding my own business, when this woman siddles up to me and says, "You want I should make it so your car never needs a wash and wax again?"
And I think to myself, "Self, this could be the opportunity of a lifetime."
As a reference, she hands me this article entitled, "Michael Jackson's Sedona 'Murderess" Revealed," while pointing to herself, and nodding in a, "Yeah, that's what I'm talking about," kind of way.
Then she takes out some sort of rock (it looked like a piece of coal,) and says to me, "Place this under your front seat, driver's side, and you'll never need to wash that car again. Also, the pressure from your weight will turn this into a 40 carat diamond within six months."
"What's the cost?" I ask, wide-eyed with wonder. I only have to give her a couple finger nail clippinings and one sliver of hair.
I'm all in on this. She just seemed so sincere, and certainly carried the aura of someone whom you should not triffle. But I should have read the article first. Now I know what she can do with just a few minor, but personal, body parts. So, I'm currently buying up all the Rottweiler litters in the state.
Thanks for the heads up article.
Dixon.
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David Billings 07/08/2009 5:26:00 PM
To All the MJ Haters:
You believe Jackson touched little boys because you WANTED him to touch all little boys. You project all your sick, twisted fantasies on something pure, innocent and plutonic. He surrounded himself with little boys so he MUST have been fucking them; he had sleepovers with little boys so he MUST have been fucking them. You people are fastidious scandal whores. Nevermind that he was never convicted of one damn thing and that many of his accusers have sense recanted and admitted that they lied, no doubt being put up to it by greedy parents who were just out to bilk a money train.
Michael Jackson transformed the world and it just drives you nuts that someone so eccentric held such an undeniable power over people, so you spew this ignorant drivel. Who's going to make a fuss over you people when you die? No one, because you've never done anything with your life that has mattered and your existence is irrelevant.
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CharlesR 07/08/2009 4:01:00 PM
Here's the thing: New Times' spoofs are about as clever and innovative as wedgies and nipple twisters. What do you expect from a company run by dinosaurs and staffed by assclowns and sycophants?
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FattieFatkins 07/08/2009 8:40:00 AM
I wonder if Billy Mayes ever called on her services?
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Tim Roman 07/08/2009 5:59:00 AM
Im not saying Michael wasn't a brilliant performer (Thriller was one of the greatest records ever), but his life became an ugly thing to watch. People aren't wrong to ridicule him for what he became.
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Z-Liberator 07/08/2009 5:52:00 AM
OoooH OoooH, this is real! I believe it. Scary, I too study this art she sounds like a real beast. In the art you cant kill without getting back what you sent out and the life of a dog does not cut it, she needs human blood to stay alive. So she has probably killed someone!
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Tim Roman 07/08/2009 5:42:00 AM
A $26,000 gold-plated casket... a huckster to the end. Mr. Robles, you sound like the usual ignorant supporter of this little perv. I SEEN that from what you done writ. No, F-You!
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William Robles 07/08/2009 4:03:00 AM
Those Who Hate Michael Jackson. I have Real Strong Words To you Clowns F YOU!!!!
I was at the Memorial and the things I seen The Things I heard and Those Who Cried You know Michael Heard and seen you in heaven.
I Will miss him too What I think we should do is have a candel light for him next week friday Around 7pm
I will post the place where we will Before Next Friday
REST IN PEACE MICHAEL JACKSON
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Whaaaaat?! 07/07/2009 10:38:00 PM
ANA's sphincter's sewn so tight that I doubt she can relieve herself. Michael Jackson was a ridiculous sideshow. Look at the funeral today!
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JeffRich 07/07/2009 10:34:00 PM
For ANA from Phoenix, you can't libel or slander the dead...at least not legally. Plus the article you post looks like it might have some problems with it as well...one of the commenters there claims it to be a hoax...Wouldn't it be rich if this one was on the up-and-up, and ANA's was a hoax?
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NOTORIOUS 07/07/2009 10:30:00 PM
What a piquant antidote to the madness currently going on in L.A. with Jacko's funeral. Bravo to Mr. Rossi for this fine send-up of "the King of Pop." Granted Jacko had some good tunes. Otherwise people need to get a grip.
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ANA 07/07/2009 8:23:00 PM
http://michaeljacksonebmeier.wordpress.com/2009/06/28/jordan-chandler-admits-he-lied-about-michael-jackson/
Check out the link above...we'll see how many more confessions hit the news regarding MJ's so called victims. Regarding the New Times article, I think this article is ridiculous and slanderous. If this woman does exist she should be persecuted on many levels for many things. The article itself is so poorly written and reads as if written by a five year old! Out of respect for Michael Jackson, regardless if you liked his music or not, or what you thought about him...he is a human being who has now passed and there should be some respect shown towards he and his family in this great time of loss and sadness! I am a fan of New Times and this article is very upsetting...regardless of it's purpose, it is ugly and sickening....PERIOD!
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Phoenix Writer 07/07/2009 7:13:00 PM
I read this yesterday and it was clear, by the end, that it was intended to be satire. Still, I found it in bad taste, disrespectful to the memory of the deceased and to the Jackson family. It's also rife with racist, hateful imagery and expressions (he blanched, not that you couldt tell; he had brown lesions on his penis, the image of Michael with pins in his penis) that say a whole lot about the writer and his biases. May the same be said, in public, about you when you die...as a joke...
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Eric Cartman 07/07/2009 2:25:00 PM
Please!!! Don't you know Dr. Renalda De Souza that I have the bones of the Elephant Man. Michael Jackson gave them to me in return for "services rendered". I have NO intentions of ever giving them up. Whatever hokie voodoo you try to put ion me to get them back will only come back on you ten-fold! I caution you Dr. De Souza, you do not want to cross my path. I acquired the bones fair and square. Just get over it and move on. You had your revenge.
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joby walters 07/07/2009 1:10:00 AM
i bet she cant cure any HELLS ANGELS motorcycle club members of any of their evil ways or put any kind of hex or voodoo hoodoo curse on them either. they are protected by Satan! i bet she would be to scared to even try. those guys are mean and evil as they come and there is no cure for their evil ways.
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randy 07/07/2009 12:57:00 AM
he was a pill junkie,child molester cho-mo and a pervert who had talent and blew all his god given talent and gifts on pain pill narcotic drug addiction.
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Dr. Reinalda de Souza 07/06/2009 6:48:00 PM
I highly resent all you poor fools saying that I do not exist. (I asked one of my clients to put this message out in my name, because I don't know how to operate a computer.) The athlete to whom the reader refers is my nephew, my namesake, dearies! I assure you that I do exist, and am doing quite well with my medical practice. My clients are getting a big laugh out of all the people who think New Times made up this story. I spent days with Mr. Rossi, who didn't really believe that I had the power to kill. But I finally convinced him that I do by willing my neighbor's Yorkshire Terrier to jump off a cliff and kill itself in front of our eyes. Quite a mess down below! But, don't worry, I bought him a new dog the next day -- one from the pound who needed a good home. It requires far less magic with an animal than with a human being, you see. The kind of ignorance some of you display is what gives the American Medical Association power over your minds, as well as your bank accounts. I implore you, break free before it is too late! ...Dr. Reinalda
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Walt 07/06/2009 4:03:00 PM
This was obviously satire people.
The subject of the story Reinalda de Souza who is from Brazil is obviously a play on the name a Brazilian soccer player. See below
http://www.goal.com/en-us/people/brazil/14877/reinaldo
Full Name: Reinaldo De Souza
Date of Birth: Jun 8, 1980
Place of Birth: Rio de Janeiro
Nationality: Brazil
As for the author Joe Rossi
Lou Grant worked at the fictitious Los Angeles Tribune daily newspaper as its city editor, a job he took after the WJM television station fired him. (Though Mary Tyler Moore Show viewers were introduced to the character as a television news producer, the character noted many times that he'd begun his career as a print journalist.) The rest of the main cast included Robert Walden and Linda Kelsey, who played general-assignment reporters Joe Rossi and Billie Newman, respectively.
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Bubbles Jackson 07/05/2009 6:52:00 PM
Who cares about the fucking dog, dipshit?! Give it up. Come on, are you people really that stupid. Here this story claims a woman killed a human being, and you only care about the damn mutt. A dog isn't even as smart as a monkey. Get a life!
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Glenn 07/05/2009 4:02:00 PM
Either this story is BS or animal cruelty! The reporter witnessed the dead puppy and did not report this? A story is a story but when witnessing a crime it must be reported! If the reporter feels a story is more important than a crime he is wrong. It has been reported now! Let's see if it is bs. If this is true then let us all see how much integrity this publication has. It is in their ballpark now.
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Theo Sophist 07/05/2009 8:07:00 AM
On the race card tip, no one played it when Elvis bit. That didn't come till later. Imagine all them crackers crying these eyes out like he was Jesus Christ.
Thing is, black folk now want to forget Jackson was playing with boys' peepees. And that's ALL white folks want to remember bout Jackson, though these were the ones buying his records and trying to be like him.
The truth is somewhere in the middle. Its not racist to write this story or make fun of Michael. What Al Sharpton and Deepak Chopra is doing is worse -- using their dead "friend" to get their names in the paper.
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Rex Smith 07/05/2009 7:34:00 AM
Ignorance, ignorance! Of course, Dr. De Souza is real. I was cured of homosexuality by her. I'm not kidding. And there's no doubt she is capable of putting a voodoo hex on somebody. She has quite a temper.
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Todd Rutledge 07/05/2009 7:29:00 AM
I disagaree. Thought it was a great satire. A laugh a minute. If it was satire... I'm not so sure it wasn't true. With a nutcase like Michael, anything's possible. And I've heard of this Dr. De Souza.
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J.U. 07/05/2009 2:56:00 AM
I was hoping this story was some kind of sick joke (I just moved to Phoenix and didn't realize the paper did these kind of things). Jesus Christ on a crutch.
The satire wasn't great, but satire is extremely hard to do well, so props for trying and for creativity.
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Stormy K. 07/04/2009 8:17:00 PM
I think the funniest part of this story was when the author claimed that the subject, a voodoo practitioner, used the phrase "As sure as God made green apples...". That line was awesome, and I'm wondering how many readers will catch the tongue-in-cheek irony of it. And telling the Hulk to avoid the color green??? That was a hoot!! I haven't laughed this much over one of your stories since the Anna Nicole love-child joke. I'm anxious to see how many outraged readers believe THIS story is actually true. Do you suppose the county sheriff up there will get a ton of animal-cruelty calls about the dead puppy thing???? Keep up the good work, folks. This one was great.
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Ted Strawberry 07/04/2009 6:58:00 PM
Ah, the race card. Michael Jackson was black!? Sure looked white to me. Joe Price obviously didn't read New Times' story on Anna Nichole Smith. Joe, it's about ridculing riduculous dweebs.
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Joe Price 07/04/2009 5:42:00 PM
This is a racist article. If Jackson had been a white man, would you be demeaningv him like this in death?
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Lynn 07/04/2009 1:00:00 PM
Hilarious!
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Jethro Bodean 07/04/2009 4:35:00 AM
I can attest to the healing properties of Dr. De Souza. She rubbed the blood of a French poodle on my member and now Im hung like John Holmes (before he died, of course). Long live Dr. De Souza! Doc, just keep on performing your brand of miriculous medicine; don't listen to those stupid dog lovers. Stupid hippies, one and all. It's not a Saturday night at our house in Bev-er-ley unless we ritually sacrifice a dog or two. Great for the Fourth of July barbecue!
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Tony Beggart 07/04/2009 2:51:00 AM
Michael Jackson is (err, was) a douche. The dude touched kids. He owed a mess of people money. His character is poo! People pass on every day. Why doesn't the world care about that? Instead they lift up Michael Jackson and make him out to be some kind of prince. This world is so fucked. So fucked.
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Pasquali 07/04/2009 1:50:00 AM
Seriously? Really? Was this a honest to god real story? If it was please email me back so I can drive to sedona and slit her fuckin neck and hold her until she dies kicking and screaming. To wish death on someone is one thing. To think that this bullshit voodoo new age hippy shit will cure you is just ludicrous. PEOPLE! WE ARE IN THE 21st CENTURY NOW. KNOCK OFF THE MAGIC SHIT! IT DOESNT WORK! And with that being said, that all of this is bologne, she killed a defenseless Rottweiler Puppy! ASPCA will be getting my phone call as soon as I confirm this story is real.
O... and to "ilovecats" your a stupid fuck, cats have more protine than dogs. So I am coming over to make meatballs out of your little fuzzy shit machines!
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Bilco 07/03/2009 10:44:00 PM
Lauren is the kind of humorless idiot that New Times must count on when it writes a parody like this. Michael Jackson's whole life has been in poor taste since the success he enjoyed with Thriller. Lauren, please seek out Dr. De Souza and get her to transplant a sense of humor into that stupid brain of yours!
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Jeff Cochran 07/03/2009 10:37:00 PM
Isn't it ironic that satire on Michael Jackson is more truthful than all the hype we've been reading and seeing on this perv? Thank God somebody showed this little freak for what he was.
Leave it to New Times to make huge fun of all the crap out there, including the BET show. It was like the perv stuff never had happened. New Times is funny as hell in hitting the mark. You made my day!
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Tim Cartwright 07/03/2009 10:28:00 PM
The funniest part of this, um, expose' was when she put needles in Jacko's "nether region" and left him in that naked state while she went grocery shopping. See, he loved humiliation. Righto! The Ed McMahon part was a hoot, too. Hi-yo (cough)oh(cough)oh (cough)oh (cough). And the Gipper's aura being the color of cow dung. Ha! Joe Rossi is wasting his time writing for a newspaper. He should work for SNL.
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Lauren 07/03/2009 10:25:00 PM
Regardless of whether this is satire or partial truth, that doesn't change the fact that it is in horrible taste.
Not only are you giving a supposed murderer, fake or not, the ability to voice her sickness to the world; you're also being incredibly disrespectful to the deceased. Michael Jackson died, and maybe he did some regretful things in his lifetime, but there is a certain level of respect that should be granted to the deceased.
On top of human decency, if this were true, I'd hope that this woman gets what is coming to her. Not just for the blatant animal abuse, but the lack of sensibility. You do NOT murder someone because they broke a verbal agreement.
Yet another solid reminder as to why I DON'T read the PHX NewTimes.
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Omar Tedesco 07/03/2009 10:16:00 PM
What Madame De Souza did is not out ofthe ordinary in our town of Sedona. There are many healers like the good doctor, but few have her experience or plethora of degrees. I saw Michael Jackson in Sedona once, late at night at a restaurant that he had reserved for his private party for the evening. I didn't realize the place was closed to the general public, and had gone there hoping to get some vegan fare, the best in town. I also saw Farrah there on another occasion, though she was with a man inside the place, in a secluded booth. I almost didn't recognize her she was so skinny and apparently disease-ravaged. I've never met De Souza, but I've heard of this healer to the stars in our midst. Jackson was a pitiful soul who probably needed all the help he could get to rid himself of the deamons that made him love little boys. Scientology cured a couple of prominent actors of homoxexuality; De Souza's remedies are far more plausible than L. Ron Hubbard's.
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07/03/2009 4:29:00 PM
One more Rottweiler wiped off the face of this earth is fine with me. Thank you Reinalda.
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Rick Karbon 07/03/2009 2:35:00 PM
It is remarkable that within the scope of this woman's foul perception of what is right and what is wrong, the criminal act of killing an innocent puppy goes unrecognized.
If she sliced the neck of "...a 4�-month-old pup she'd brought home from the pound." The horror of her actions should not be described again, except in a courtroom before a judge.
Where is the ASPCA in Sedona? Can the local police look into this? I'm outraged about the puppy's death, not Jacko's.
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alex prescott 07/03/2009 5:26:00 AM
haha, funny satire. i got a lot out of it
with respect
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Ed 07/03/2009 3:02:00 AM
Where the hell was this bitch when Bush was in office!?
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Mary 07/03/2009 1:48:00 AM
1. What a psycho.
2. Where's the animal cruelty charges for killing a puppy?
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Martin 07/03/2009 1:03:00 AM
Finally, the (belated) April's Fools story for 2009!
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SundevilRick101 07/03/2009 12:02:00 AM
To George Watson:
Really? Are you a full on moron or just a partial one?
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George Watson 07/02/2009 11:23:00 PM
This article states that this woman, Reinalda de Souza, killed a puppy that she adopted from the pound....this is animal cruelty, and satire or not, this needs reported to Animal Control and investigated.
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SundevilRick101 07/02/2009 10:47:00 PM
THIS IS SATIRE! My god people get a frackin clue! This is not a real story, just like the Anna Nicole story New Times did last year wasn't real.
As for New Times loosing credibility, are you kidding me? There is a big hint about the validity of the story on the front page for Christsakes! Joe Rossi worked for Lou Grant...You know, the TV SHOW?
New Times knows when to look at itself in the mirror and think "oops we are being too serious time to step back." It is in fun, it doesn't take the credibility away from a single writer. These are people that have won many many many awards.
Lastly to the morons that are saying Jackson was amazing blah blah blah. I like his music as well but the fact that he touched little boys reserves him a special place in hell. Yes I believe he touched little boys, and I think he paid off the parents to get them to shut up. He was a perv. A very very talented perv but a perv none the less.
All the people that think he was amazing, when he was alive would you have left a 6 year old alone with him? I didn't think so.
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Jeff 07/02/2009 10:19:00 PM
The New Times writes fictious bullshit fairy tales like this because they know their readers are gullible idiots. Just read "Letters to the editor" after they write a horribly biased, slanted article. This is a hoax. The New Times is really struggling for an identity.
You really want us to believe she met Jackson in Bahrain at a gathering for loyalty? And he showed up at her door in Sedona? And anyone who is anybody has been to her for treatment? Shaq went to HER for help on his free throws? Amare went to her to heal his eye? Sheriff Joe sees her for mental issues? Ronald Reagan went to her to heal his alzheimers? And of course there are ties to recent celebs who died, Ed McMahon and Farrah Fawcett.
I would say New Times has lost all credibility, but they've never had any to begin with.
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Tam 07/02/2009 10:13:00 PM
Can I have my fifteen minutes back?
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Jackson Rules 07/02/2009 7:13:00 PM
Mike, I couldn't agree more!
Babe, this woman should be in jail for animal abuse if she did what this story claims- but this story is a hoax. New Times has published several hoax/satire stories over ther years. Too bad those losers had to make fun of the death of a great man with this one.
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Rod Parsley 07/02/2009 7:11:00 PM
Dr. De Souza..I cannot thank you enough for what you did for my shortened leg. It's about time you got some press about your wonderful gift. If not for you, my life would have been HELL! Your wonderful combination of chlorine, phosgene and mustard gas (or Yperite) to help extend the molecular structure of my left leg is uncompromised. I can wear sneakers again! You rule Souza, you rule!!
ps - at least they didn't ask you about your Tetrodotoxin, Botulinum toxin and ricin experiments with that group of retarded children from Kentucky...
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Babe 07/02/2009 7:01:00 PM
New Times should have reported her for animal cruelty. What a disgusting soul she is to take the life of a puppy! SICK ASS!!!
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Mike 07/02/2009 6:47:00 PM
This is just flat out ridiculous! I mean what the hell have you done in your life???
You didnt write thriller thats for fucking sure. I'm all about Satire but this is just a dumb idea thats poorly written and focuses way too heavily on the negatives of Michael that we have been hearing about for the past decade.
Jesus Christ give him a fucking break he was one of the greatest entertainers in history and you can't even say one honoring thing about him after he has passed.
I just felt dirty reading this story go fuck yourself!
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David Wiggins 07/02/2009 6:24:00 PM
I can attest to meeting Dr. De Souza on several occasions. She not only helped relieve my diabetic neuropathy but she also helped rid my wife's body of an ovarian cyst. Whether or not she actually killed Michael Jackson I cannot say. She is a very kind soul and may have exaggerated things abit with the writer (or vice versa).
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Jackson Rules 07/02/2009 6:02:00 PM
People, this story is a HOAX!
As for you idiots at New Times, Michael Jackson was a talented, kind, and generous man. You assholes should go back to writing about your obsession, Sheriff Arpaio-I noticed you just couldn't resist mentioning him in this "story". All I can say is FUCK YOU.
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Jon Bristwell 07/02/2009 4:40:00 PM
Well said, Mary K. What's so unusual about Michael Jackson getting acupuncture and crystral therapy? As for De Sousa's curse, there are more things in heaven and earth, than are dreamt of in the philosophies of the dim.
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MaryK 07/02/2009 3:47:00 PM
Just because you don't believe in action-at-a-distance, doesn't mean it isn't true. This woman has some potent credentials, and I love her comment about Sedona being filled with "stupid hippies" who don't know nearly as much as she does.
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Alan Cebolla 07/02/2009 3:37:00 PM
How about you guys leave the satire to satirical newspapers? Every year you all do some stupid assed stunt like this. Poorly written attempt at humor.
I want actual stories, not crappy satire like this.
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Rogelio 07/02/2009 2:52:00 PM
I'm still waiting for a refund for the Springsteen concert at Canyon Lake.
Nice article!
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Bill Shit 07/02/2009 1:27:00 PM
This article is obviously satire. The New Times is infamous for this sort of thing. Did you notice that all of the Celebrities that have died recently are mentioned in the story? (Ed McMahon, Farrah Fawcett, David Carradine)Besides, I think the picture they used for Dr. De Souza is actually Geronimo or something.
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Tyler Durden 07/02/2009 6:44:00 AM
"By the time they got (Ronald Reagan) to me, his aura was the color of cow dung."
Genius! BTW, Tyler Hurst is humorless, self-important shit-4-brains who twitters when he takes a dump. Idiot.
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Leonard 07/02/2009 5:40:00 AM
"Farrah Fawcett? Yes, poor dear, she came to Sedona. I placed warm jasper on her buttocks..."
Lord.
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John Frazer 07/02/2009 5:32:00 AM
Isn't Joseph Rossi the name of the reporter on the Mary Tyler Moore Show? Where is Lou Grant in all this? Did he edit this hoax? The best part of this story is when you write: "De Souza was asked what Arpaio was seeing her for, and she replied: "His fading mental facilities. You know, he's a babbling 77!" De Souza says, "I told him to start playing sudoku. And to take as much ginkgo biloba as he can handle. He's so far gone that I wouldn't waste an ounce of cubic zirconium on him."" -- simply genius.
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Mike Jackson 07/02/2009 5:18:00 AM
Oh boy. This one is a hoot! I love it. Keep the fun coming. Can't wait to see how many people fall for this load of bullshit. By the looks of 6 of the comments above mine, not many people will get it. This community needs to be tested. We need to realize we shouldn't believe everything we read. I love when you all do satire. It exposes the ignorance, idiocy, narcissism and prejudice of our silly society. It is truly one of the smartest forms of comedy. It is an over exaggerated mirror of the subject, thus exposing the ridiculousness of this Michael Jackson media fenzy. It is refreshing. It is also similar to a Parody, which is also very funny ala Weird Al and "Spaceballs". This entire thing makes me laugh. Keep it up New Times. Lighten up people. BTW, I killed JACKO!
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Elizabeth 07/02/2009 3:51:00 AM
Ummm... she killed a puppy so I hope that something is done about it because it is animal cruelty to kill a 4 1/2 month old puppy.
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SedonaBob 07/02/2009 3:49:00 AM
Met this crank once. She looks like a bag lady. I agree with the guy who wonders why you traveled all the way to Sedona to interview her. She doesn't represent Sedona or perople into New Age medicine. Why not stop a homeless person in Phoenix and ask them about the last time theywere on a UFO with MJ? You wouldve gotten the same thing.
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MichaelsNut 07/02/2009 3:25:00 AM
Yeah she's a nut. SO WAS MICHAEL JACKSON, HELLO!!!As for being tabloid, this chicks a story. Just like every freaky thing Jackson ever did. People want to gloss it over it all now. But he was a pediphile, a pervert and a drug addict. Good riddance.
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07/02/2009 2:44:00 AM
I could have sworn someone told me that New Times didn't make stuff up, but I guess I was wrong.
So, you're a newsmagazine now? Maybe a fancy art publication? Weird that it's okay to publish tabloid pieces in something you pass off as news most other days.
I take back my earlier tweets about New Times being the last hope for journalism, but look forward to reading more made stories! Hope you don't piss off the onion too much.
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sveeb 07/02/2009 1:40:00 AM
She might not go to jail for killing MJ, but animal cruelty is still illegal in Yavapai County.
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Coz 07/02/2009 1:18:00 AM
What a nut case
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quokko 07/01/2009 11:18:00 PM
I'm sorry, but you actually drobe to Sedona to interview this kook? And then you printed what you wrote down? What a waste of time!