By Ray Stern
By Ray Stern
By New Times
By Amy Silverman
By Stephen Lemons
By Stephen Lemons
By Monica Alonzo
By Chris Parker
You killed him, too?: Oh, boy. This one is a hoot! I love it. Keep the fun coming. Can't wait to see how many people fall for this load of bullshit. This community needs to be tested. We need to realize we shouldn't believe everything we read.
I love it when you all do satire. It exposes the ignorance, idiocy, narcissism, and prejudice of our silly society. It is truly one of the smartest forms of comedy. It is an over-exaggerated mirror of the subject, thus exposing the ridiculousness of this Michael Jackson media frenzy. BTW, I really killed Jacko!
Mike Jackson, Chandler
Jeff gets it: Isn't it ironic that satire on Michael Jackson is more truthful than all the hype we've been reading and seeing on this perv? Thank God somebody showed this little freak for what he was.
Leave it to New Times to make huge fun of all the crap out there. It was like the perv stuff never had happened. New Times is funny as hell in hitting the mark. You made my day!
Jeff Cochran, Glendale
Yeah, that needles part was kinda funny: The funniest part of this, um, exposé was when she put needles in Jacko's "nether region" and left him in that naked state while she went grocery shopping. See, he loved humiliation. Righto!
The Ed McMahon part was a hoot, too. Hi-yo (cough) oh (cough) oh (cough) oh (cough). And the Gipper's aura being the color of cow dung.
Ha! Joe Rossi is wasting his time writing for a newspaper. He should work for SNL.
Tim Cartwright, Los Angeles
The Joe part is true; he really is "so far gone": Isn't Joseph Rossi the name of the reporter on the Mary Tyler Moore Show? Where is Lou Grant in all this? Did he edit this hoax?
The best part of this story is when you write: "De Souza was asked what Arpaio was seeing her for, and she replied: "His fading mental facilities. You know, he's a babbling 77!" De Souza says, "I told him to start playing sudoku. And to take as much ginkgo biloba as he can handle. He's so far gone that I wouldn't waste an ounce of cubic zirconium on him."
John Frazer, Tempe
Poor Farrah: To quote the story: Farrah Fawcett? "Yes, poor dear, she came to Sedona. I placed warm jasper on her buttocks." Lord.
Poor Ronnie: "By the time they got [Ronald Reagan] to me, his aura was the color of cow dung." Genius!
Tyler Durden, via the Internet
We didn't do one in 2008: How about you guys leave the satire to satirical newspapers? Every year you all do some stupid-ass stunt like this. I want actual stories, not crappy satire like this.
Alan Cebolla, Phoenix
Yes, it is a hoax: This story is a hoax! As for you idiots at New Times, Michael Jackson was a talented, kind, and generous man. You assholes should go back to writing about your obsession, Sheriff Arpaio. I noticed you just couldn't resist mentioning him in this "story." All I can say is fuck you.
Jackson Rules, Phoenix