Every week, we're recapping season three of Fuller House. Southern California, here we come!
The "house" of Fuller House has become almost like another main character, an utterly iconic piece of television history. (In fact, the show's creator bought the house featured in exterior shots.) A minimum of eight people live their lives there, and we've seen several iterations of its many rooms. That said, it's wildly refreshing to take our characters out of their environment and out into the real world — one with less hugging, probably.
Episode nine takes them down to Los Angeles, the new home for part of the elder set (Becky, Jesse, and Danny). Stephanie's "viral" video for "The Boy Next Door" has earned her a slot on Wake Up USA, Danny and Becky's new talk show (insert Ivanka Trump joke here). The only performance she's done of the song was in her living room for the video itself, and now she's about to perform on national TV.
Hold up, Steph. As season one would like us to believe, you're a ~*world renowned DJ*~. You headlined Coachella at the last minute, performing to approximately 100,000 people. What exactly is the problem here?
Not helping as usual is Kimmy, who insists on tagging along for the trip. After all, she's the one who turned the video around by adding clips of Baby Tommy and Cosmo the dog being adorable. Furthermore, she's determined to find her way on camera during the show itself, even though Danny can't stand her. Fernando invites himself along, too, mostly because the Wake Up USA studios are next door to the set of Police Mom, his favorite sitcom. Neither of them are there for Steph, but maybe she's lucky that they'll be thoroughly distracted.
And then there's the continuing Katsopolis baby drama from the Thanksgiving episode, as Jesse and Becky gear up to meet with an adoption agent. Naturally, she's set to arrive only an hour before Becky's show time. They get off to a bad start, with Jesse accidentally assuming that the agent, Mrs. Lopez, is a Becky superfan and almost getting her kicked out. As he struggles through that misstep, Fernando comes to beg to get access to the Police Mom set. This captures the attention of Mrs. Lopez, who is also a huge fan. Becky succumbs to their begging in hopes of buttering up the agent. She takes a nervous Stephanie with them so she can get some fresh air and chill the eff out.
Meanwhile, back at the house, DJ and Matt are also planning to make a great escape up to Napa Valley, their first alone trip together since making it official a month ago. She's nervous about it moving too fast, but trying not to overthink it (her specialty). She's commissioned the help of Joey, who makes yet another trip up from Vegas to help babysit. As we saw at Thanksgiving, he has four children of his own. Is there literally no one else who lives in San Francisco that can help? At any rate, he shows up with a packed bag and doughnuts in hand, ready to spend the weekend with Jackson, Ramona, Max, and Tommy.
The next morning, they all get up, and Matt and DJ are about ready to leave. All of a sudden, all the kids come in complaining about stomach pain. At first, she thinks they're just trying to get her to stay, but in fact, they've all gotten food poisoning from the doughnuts Joey brought. Thankfully sparing us a Bridesmaids-style scene, we do see them run to their respective bathrooms, and later laid up in bed, suffering from the spoils of dough and glaze.
Matt is spared as he opted against a doughnut, due to his upcoming photo shoot for the male veterinarian calendar (a real thing, apparently). DJ is able to help out for a little while, until the half-doughnut she ate catches up with her, too.
Needless to say, they never make it to Napa.
However, it offers an opportunity for DJ to see Matt care for her boys, which excites her and scares her at the same time. They're already attached to him — what if it doesn't work out? She's able to talk it through with her sister and Kimmy at the end, recalling how they all felt when their dad, Danny, started dating again after their mom died. Ultimately, they agreed then that they just wanted him to be happy, and they're certain DJ's boys want the same for her.
Let's be real, we all want the same for DJ. #TeamDJ
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Back in La La Land, the gang is checking out the Police Mom set. Fernando and Mrs. Lopez are taking selfies, Becky and Stephanie watch the clock, and Jesse tries desperately to impress the woman who can put in a good word and get them a baby. They start wrapping up, but stop for one last photo op in the "fake" jail cell. Steph shuts the gate in front of them and they get the cell-phie (get it?). However, for whatever reason, the lock actually works and they are now totally stuck with no key and no cell service.
On the set next door, time is running out and Becky is nowhere to be found. Danny's producer announces the "brilliant" idea of bringing up an audience member to fill in as his co-host. Y'know, definitely no liability there. As the number is called, Kimmy finds herself just a few seats away, and jumps over the actual occupant to fake her way onto the set. Danny suffers through long periods of banter and even Kimmy hijacking his cooking segment.
The "prisoners" downstairs are starting to run out of hope. Becky's never missed a show in almost 30 years on the air. Stephanie had finally mustered up enough courage to perform, but she's missing her big break. Jesse comforts her, reminding her that he taught her everything he knows and she's talented enough to pull it off. Even if it doesn't happen today, it's going to happen for her someday. The adoption agent overhears and is so impressed, she's going to put in a good word at the agency.
Finally, Becky suggests that they try a human pyramid to break loose, a trick from her old cheerleading days. They hoist Stephanie up and over the (very easy to scale) cell bars and wall. As he watches, Jesse leans on an outside set of bars, which swings them wide open. Everyone is relieved and after helping Steph off the wall, they run back to the Wake Up USA studio. They crash onto set just in time for Danny to introduce his daughter for her performance ("No nepotism here!" he jokes.) Her hair still in curlers, she gets through one measure and suddenly, Danny announces that they're out of time. WOMP. Luckily though, she's invited on again for the next week. Guess it's good to have dads in high places.