Pity Brian H. His life hasn't been the same since a mysterious government agency, devoted entirely to controlling his mind, began dogging his every move. The 50-ish former investment banker has taken to sleeping in his car and hiding out in Wal-Mart parking lots just to get a little peace. But still the agents of this nefarious organization -- most of them women carrying purses and flashing wicked grins -- seek out Brian and attempt to boil his brain with weird, ultrasonic devices.
Brian agreed to meet with me in a private room at the Scottsdale Public Library and, as long as I didn't use his full name or show his face in any photographs, to speak with me about this awful thing that's happening to him -- and which he says might one day happen to you.
New Times: What's happening to you?
Brian H.: Last November, I moved into an apartment complex in a Phoenix suburb, and within two weeks of giving my address to the Department of Public Safety, I started feeling some type of unusual sensations in my brain. My heart rate began to be affected, and I started feeling more anxious and more stressed for no particular reason. Since I was on the top floor, the only place it could have been coming from was the apartment below. Whoever was living below me was projecting something through the floor that made my brain boil like I'd stuck my head in a microwave oven. It was a heat sensation, and it felt like it was killing brain cells.
NT: And the guy who lived below you was doing this?
Brian: Well, he may have been working for a larger organization. I felt deadening sensations in my eardrums. By the way, I'm keeping these foam earplugs in during this interview, because whoever is doing this has a habit of coming along and blasting me once in a while, and it numbs my brain.
NT: (Looking over shoulder.) You mean someone might come by here and blast you while we're talking?
Brian: I'm being followed continuously, believe that or not.
NT: Will they also zap me? Because I wouldn't really like that.
Brian: If they do, I'll feel it, but you might not. I was in the library of a major university recently and I felt a blast go through the entire room, like ultrasonic sound. I turned around and there was a woman there, and I looked at her and she looked at me with a sly smile. And I asked everyone in the library if they felt it, and they hadn't. I've been exposed to this continuously since last January; they blast me at least twice a day, wherever I happen to be.
NT: Who is doing this to you?
Brian: I've speculated continuously about that, and the only thing I can come up with is that these people have clipped some kind of a tracking device on my vehicle, because they seem to always know where I'm at. They'll show up, and they have some kind of a transmitter that sends shock waves directly to my brain. If it's a woman, she'll have the device in her purse. I brought you this catalogue from a company called Amazing Products and Devices. Look at this page here. They sell an ultrasonic device for blasting rodents; it's one you carry in your pocket. That could be what these people are using to zap me.
NT: (Reading catalogue.) Look here. They also sell a Rid-away Rat Router. And here's the Sonic Nausea Device; it's only $15!
Brian: Yes. On this page, there's the Ultra Ultrasonic Shrieker, and the catalogue says, "Please don't use on human beings, could have adverse effects." But once they sell the product, who's going to regulate how it's used?
NT: Uh, maybe the Ultra Ultrasonic Shrieker Police? Look, you still haven't told me who's doing this to you.
Brian: It seems like I'm always being followed by different vehicles, although it's sometimes the same person driving. I've written down a lot of license plate numbers, and I've had a couple of them yell at me for doing that. The main thing they're trying to do is to anger me enough so I'll say something strong against them, or maybe even strike one of them, so they can file a lawsuit against me.
NT: Who? Who are these people?
Brian: I think they're individuals representing a larger organization. Maybe they're jealous of me, or they don't like me. I can't figure out what kind of organization would have enough money to pay all these people to shoot these ultrasonic waves at me.
NT: Why you?
Brian: I thought it might be someone trying to drive me away from Phoenix, so I drove up to northern Arizona, and I drove through California and through southern Oregon. But they were everywhere I went.
NT: So someone is following you and causing pain in your head. Why? What do they have to gain by doing this?
Brian: I have a little money saved, and they might want to anger me so that I will strike one of them and then they can file a lawsuit that goes after my money. But if I were to be jailed for doing something like that, and I told the police I was being followed by people with ultrasonic head-zapping devices, I don't know that they'd believe me.
NT: I don't know that I believe you. Have you called the police?
Brian: Yes, but they stop zapping me when the police arrive. I called the police so often they finally said, "If you call one more time we're going to arrest you and force you to take a psychiatric exam." They thought I was crazy.
NT: Perhaps they're right. Have you spoken to a psychiatrist?
Brian: I was sleeping in my car one morning and there was a woman in an SUV who started zapping me as soon as I woke up. So I called 911, and they asked me to submit to a psychiatric exam. I did, and the doctor ended up telling me that he knew I was telling the truth, that these people really were following me around with some sort of head-zapping agenda. It's harassment. And it's the perfect crime, because there are no fingerprints or bullets.
NT: What are you going to do about it?
Brian: I've tried losing them, I've driven up to Utah, to Nevada. But I think they're following me with a tracking device. Maybe if I went up in an airliner and then parachuted out of the emergency exit, that might be a way to get away from them. They're evil incarnate. They're trying to make me ill. I went to Flagstaff, and they started using a device on me that sends out a high, shrill sound that causes diarrhea, so I can't hold any food inside. Before, when I was in Phoenix, they were using a device that caused constipation.
NT: Sometimes just living in Phoenix can do that to you. What are these things here?
Brian: A friend of mine suggested I buy this steel helmet, and I wear it when I drive, because people will pull up alongside me and blast me. At night, I sleep with it over my head, which seems to help a lot. And these here are headphones that block sound, but they're kind of hard to wear with the helmet.
NT: And you wear these when you drive.
Brian: Yes, mostly when I'm on the interstates. But they've found a way to get inside my vehicle, even when I sleep in front of well-lighted Wal-Marts. I woke up one morning and I had wood tick bites all over me. Someone had broken into my car while I slept and poured wood ticks on me. So now I duct tape my car locks, and I put motion sensors inside my car.
NT: How come we can't show your face or use your whole name?
Brian: I wanted to get the word out about this, because it could be happening to others. But I'm worried that I might make things worse for myself by revealing my identity. These people are like Nazis; if they don't like the way you walk, or if you're a single male, they'll zap you. It's a form of domestic terrorism. They're going to reduce you to pulp, where you're in a mental institution in a padded cage.
NT: Maybe you're crazy.
Brian: Do I seem that way to you?
NT: Gosh, no! But have you thought about medication? That might help.
Brian: I don't think there's any pill that will stop this, because it goes right through walls and through your skull and into your brain. Even if I check into a motel, there's someone in the next room who has one of these devices pointed at me. Other than living in a steel building with a steel roof, which would get really hot, I don't know what to do.
NT: I'm starting to get nervous. These people you talk about could be sitting right outside the door. That woman over there could have a brain-zapper in her purse. How do I know this won't start happening to me?
Brian: You don't! An article I read on the Internet said that they're targeting single men. So you're safe if you're married. Maybe they're a feminist organization, opposed to men. Every time I eat in a restaurant, one of them comes in and sits close to me and I have to move in the middle of every meal. I know this sounds nuts, but I'm not making this up. This is really happening. It's real. And any one of us could be the next target.
Get the Arts and Theater Newsletter
Weekly information keeping you in the know when it comes to the Phoenix art and theater scene. Find out about upcoming performances, exhibitions, openings and special events.