We're Doomed: Testicle-Biting Fish Found in Sweden | Jackalope Ranch | Phoenix | Phoenix New Times | The Leading Independent News Source in Phoenix, Arizona
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We're Doomed: Testicle-Biting Fish Found in Sweden

Between great whites, hammerheads, and the mythical megalodon, Shark Week did not disappoint in the usual lineup of underwater killers to keep us clinging to dry land. But now, just as we thought our darkest documentary moments were behind us, an undersea terror known for traveling up the pant leg...
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Between great whites, hammerheads, and the mythical megalodon, Shark Week did not disappoint in the usual lineup of underwater killers to keep us clinging to dry land. But now, just as we thought our darkest documentary moments were behind us, an undersea terror known for traveling up the pant leg of male swimmers has been discovered trolling down the coast of Scandinavia.

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Men in Sweden are currently being advised not to swim in the nude after a pacu fish, also known in Papua New Guinea as a "ball cutter," was caught by fisherman in Oresund Sound off the country's coast. The fish is a relative of the piranha and can grow up to roughly three feet in length and weigh as much as 55 pounds.

Equipped with flat, human-like teeth, these fish, which are typically found in the Amazonian Basin, have a flair for biting off human testicles (and once, a child's finger), possibly mistaking human nuts for more the more literal nuts in their loosely vegetarian diet.

In Papua New Guinea, the pacu fish claimed the lives of two fishermen who died of blood loss after their testicles were bitten off. Though there have been no reports of attacks off the Swedish coast, beach goers are still advised to proceed with caution -- and clothing.

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