He measures around 3-foot-6, likes wearing quaint green outfits on Saint Patrick's Day, and is a bit of a devilish trickster. Nope, we ain't referring to the WWE's Hornswoggle or even that evil lil' bastard from the Leprechaun flicks, but rather Chuey the Rock 'n' Roll Midget. The 29-year-old lascivious Lilliputian and bartender (who will be spending his St. Paddy's Day dressed as "Mexican Leprechaun" and pouring drinks at Giligin's in Scottsdale) is just one of the crafty characters you might encounter haunting Valley bars and clubs on Thursday, March 17. What else is in store for the annual exercise in both Celtic culture and alcoholic excess? Read on for a full rundown. — Benjamin Leatherman
440 N. 32nd St.
R&B superstars J. Holiday and Yung Joc team up for the St. Patty's Day Swagg showcase. 8 p.m., $28-$48. Call 602-267-1600.
Fourth Street & Mill Avenue, Tempe
KUPD will host a massive and madcap Saint Patrick's Day Block Party that will be headlined by hard rockers Filter, Red Line Chemistry, and Saving Abel. 2 p.m. $18-$20. See www.98kupd.com.
Irish Cultural Center
1106 N. Central Ave.
Get your fill of Celtic culture on Saint Patty's Day as the center will be serving chef Frank Hand's Irish lamb stew from all day, and both the gift shop and bar will be open for business. Meanwhile, A Journey Through Phil Coulter's Ireland will be screened inside at various times, Arizona's Irish Chorale Group will perform at 5:30 p.m., and traditional Ceili will be held starting at 7 p.m. Open at 10 a.m. Admission is free, but prices for food, drinks, and the Ceili vary. Call 602-258-0109.
Musical Instrument Museum
4725 E. Mayo Blvd.
The five musicians who make up SLIDE Ireland are sure to impress the MIM with their beautiful mix of traditional music, Celtic hymns, and plenty of attitude. 7 p.m., $25-$36. Call 480-478-6000
St. Patrick's Day Block Party
Craftsman Court between 3rd Ave. and 5th Ave., Scottsdale
This block party encompasses Dos Gringos, Upper Deck Sports Grill, and Acme Bar, and includes access to all three bars, drink deals such as eight green beers for $20, live music, DJs, food vendors, and more. Runs until 2 a.m. Free before 9 p.m., $10 after 9. Visit www.scottsdalesultimateblockparty.com.
398 S. Mill Ave., Tempe
Looking for respite from KUPD's block party? Duck into Caffe Boa for bangers and mash, corned beef and cabbage, shepherd's pie, and drink specials all day. Call 480-968-9112.
Four Valley locations
Feeling hungry? Slide on into any of the Chompie's restaurants and partake in an all-you-can-eat corned beef feast, which includes cabbage, boiled potatoes, and Irish soda bread. Green beer will also be served. 11 a.m., $17.95 per person. Call 480-557-0700 or 480-860-0475.
7000 E. Mayo Blvd.
Local Celtic rock band Traveler will perform a special Saint Patrick's set at the restaurant. 8 p.m., $10. Call 480-585-5483.
Sparky's Old Town Creamery
510 S. Mill Ave., Tempe
Free 30-ounce mint ice cream cones will be given out with any purchase. 11 a.m.-11 p.m. Call 480-221-7273.
Thirsty Dog 2 Go
15 W. 5th St., Tempe
Patrons can wear green and get a buy one, get one free deal any sausage or hot dog. 9 a.m.-11 p.m. Call 480-221-7273.
The Turf Restaurant and Pub
705 N. 1st St.
Sip on a pint or two of Guinness or sample a snifter of any of the Turf's Irish whiskeys and single-mat scotches during its St. Patrick's Day party, which will also feature music from Tartanic, Kilted Spirit, The Waters, and Dan McGuinness. 2 p.m.-2 a.m. Call 602-296-5043.
Zipps Sports Grills
Seven Valley locations
Green beer will be served and March Madness games will be broadcast in high-definition at each of the various Zipps around the Valley. Open until 2 a.m. Call 602-957-2112.
BARS, PUBS, & CLUBS
12014 N 32nd St.
Saint Rockabilly Patty's Day Party with music from Motel Drive and Hank Hall. 9 p.m. Call 602-788-4574.
Brigett's Last Laugh
17222 N. Cave Creek Rd.
Nosh on $7.50 corned beef and cabbage while enjoying $3 shots of Jameson and Bushmills. Karaoke starts at 9 p.m. Open until 2 a.m. Call 602-788-0507.
2000 E. Rio Salado Pkwy., Tempe
Shamrocks & Shenanigans celebration featuring such Irish food and drink specials as $4 Guinness drafts and Bushmills, $6 car bombs, and $10.99 shepherds pie. 11 a.m. to 2 a.m. Call 480-894-1111.
3935 E. Thomas Rd.
There will be plenty of green inside Clicks, whether it's the emerald felt on its 22 different billiards tables or the green beer getting poured into pints. A flat rate of $13 for pool will be available all evening. Call 602-220-0859. 7 p.m. Call 602-220-0859.
2000 E. Rio Salado Pkwy., Tempe
St. Patty's Day Block Party featuring Irish dancers, bagpipers, food and drink specials, green beer, games, giveaways, and live music from Green Flag Band and Shallow Water. 5 p.m., $10 (or free for Flogging Molly concertgoers). Call 480-557-9087.
680 S. Mill Ave., Tempe
The bartenders will serve Irish Hickie Daiquiris all day while DJ V-EZ will be spinning all night. 11 a.m. to 2 a.m. Call 480-967-3917.
1989 W. Elliot Rd., Chandler
The party starts pretty early at Fibbers, beginning with an Irish-style breakfast at 7 a.m. The rest of the day promises beer tents, promos, prizes, giveaways, and music from Holly Kirsten, Brazenheads, and The Scones. 7 a.m.-2 a.m.; $10 after 3 p.m. Call 480-722-9434.
1340 E. 8th St., Tempe
A special breakfast buffet will be available starting at 7 a.m., the first 100 patrons will receive commemorative T-shirts, Irish fare will be served, bagpipers and bands will perform, and March Madness games will be shown. Open until 2 a.m. Call 480-303-9967.
George & Dragon
4240 N. Central Ave.
This renowned English pub won't be offering any green beer, but will instead serve up more than 65 different beers from around the world. Corned beef and cabbage will also be available. 11 a.m.-2 a.m. Call 602-241-0018.
Goat Head Saloon
1423 S. Country Club Dr., Mesa
Live music from 49 to Midnight, Pride Through Strife, Rich Tudor, and Frank Hennessey. 8 p.m. Call 480-464-8030.
6895 E. Cave Creek Rd., Cave Creek
This Cave Creek country joint will transform into "O'Harold's" and offer drink specials on Bailey's, Guinness, Harp, and Bushmills, as well as a traditional Irish menu, plenty of the requisite green beer, shuttle service, and live music from Aengus Og, The Rakes, and EastonAshe. 2 p.m.- 1 a.m. Call 480-488-1906.
The Harp Pub & Restaurant
1744 S. Val Vista Dr., Mesa
St. Patrick's Day party with food and beer specials, live music from Chuck E. Baby and Johnny Anonymous starting at 4 p.m., and more. 11 a.m.-2 a.m. Call 480-507-7827.
1371 N. Alma School Rd., Chandler
St. Patrick's Day Boozefest featuring live music, on the patio, DJs, and more. 2 p.m.; $5 after 4 p.m., $10 after 7 p.m. Call 480-213-3086.
Irish Wolfhound Restaurant & Pub
16811 N. Litchfield Rd., Surprise
St. Patrick's Day celebration with live music and entertainment, promo giveaways, drink specials, and more. 11 a.m. to 2 a.m., $5 after 3 p.m. Call 623-214-1004.
13825 N. 32nd St.
Live music from Downward Dog. 9 p.m. Call 602-992-1007.
Marc's Sports Grill & Nightlife
4494 W. Peoria Ave., Glendale
Enjoy both $6.75 corned beef sandwiches, $7.50 corned beef and cabbage platters on Saint Patrick's Day, as well as giveaways, prizes, and karaoke and dancing after 9 p.m. Drink specials include $2 green beer, Baileys, and call cocktails for ladies until 10 p.m. for laddies and until closing for lasses. 11 a.m.-2 a.m. Call 623-842-1053.
20469 N. Hayden Rd., Scottsdale
Pub Party and Music Festival featuring Irish dancing, traditional food and drink (including a "Taste of Ireland" buffet for $15), and more. Local bands EastonAshe, Ally and the Boys, Booya, and Elvis Before Noon will perform. 6 a.m.-2 a.m., $10 after noon. Call 480-585-6329.
2120 W. Guadalupe Rd., Mesa
Parking lot party featuring mechanical bull riding contests, corned beef and cabbage, bagpipers, balloon artists, cartoonists, face painters, games and prizes, and more. Live bands scheduled to perform include Rhythm Edition, 2 Tone Lizard Kings, Krak Smokin' Grannies, and 68 Guns. 6 a.m.-2 a.m. Call 480-756-6069.
4338 W. Bell Rd.
A titanic, 16,000-square-foot tent will barely contain all the revelry and raucousness that is planned for Padre Murphy's annual party. In addition to all the leprechauns, clowns, and green beer, a full day of entertainment is planning, including gigs by Irish dancers, bagpipers, Colleen Callahan, J. David Sloan and Western Bred, The McMorrow's, and more. 10 a.m.-2 a.m., $10 after 2 p.m. Call 602-547-9406.
7316 E. Stetson Dr., Scottsdale
Revolver's St. Patrick's Day Party with live video remixes from DJ Sterling, and more. 8 p.m. Call 480-772-7613 for cover.
1019 E. Indian School Rd.
Spend your Saint Patrick's Day in the company Scottish folk artist Al Stewart. 8 p.m., $27-$30. Call 602-265-4842.
3045 N. 16th St.
Saint Patty's Day party featuring an open mic jam session. Open until 2 a.m. Call 602-266-0015.
Robbie Fox's Public House
640 S. Mill Ave., Tempe
Tempe's newest Irish pub will offer bag pipers, music from Keltic Cowboys, juggling lerechauns, and such drink specials as $5 drafts. 6 a.m.-2 a.m. Call 480-642-6442.
The Rose & Crown
628 E. Adams St.
A 15,000-square-foot outdoor festival and beer garden will surround this English pub, featuring and "Irish spirit" contest for prizes, live music, giveaways, a variety of food, and drink specials, and more. 11 a.m.-2 a.m. Call 602-256-0223.
906 E. Camelback Rd.
This pub will be a hubbub of activity, beginning with an on-site broadcast of KEZ's Beth & Friends at 6 a.m. The revelry starts at 11 a.m. with food and drink specials, happy hour from 4 to 7 p.m., bagpipers, step dancing, live music, and more. Open until 2 a.m., $10 after 1 p.m. Call 602-241-1916.
401 S. Mill Ave., Tempe
Celebrate Saint Patrick's Day with shot specials throughout the day, Irish food and drink, and various promotions from Guinness, Jameson, Bailey's, and Bushmills. Live music starts at noon and includes gigs by The Sullevins, The JJ's, and The Paul Ludenia Band. 11 a.m., $5. Call 480-929-9500.
The Sail Inn
26 S. Farmer Ave., Tempe
Some of Tempe's best bands — including Flathead, Mergence, Black Carl, and What Laura Says — will perform starting at 7 p.m. Raffles and prizes will be handed out, and corned beef cabbage will be served. 5 p.m., $10 after 8 p.m. Call 480-966-9565.
San Felipe's Cantina
2000 E. Rio Salado Pkwy., Tempe
21001 N. Tatum Blvd.
Both locations will feature drink specials, green beer, live music, corned-beef burritos, promo giveaways, green margaritas, and more. 8 p.m.-2 a.m. Call 480-736-8226 or 480- 515-2337.
School of Rock
411 S. Mill Ave., Tempe
Naughty Leprechaun Party featuring 50-cent green beers until 8 p.m., a bikini contest, and more. Drink specials include $3 Guinness and $4 Irish car bombs, while the DJ lineup includes performances by ES, Mr. Eaton, and Knick Knack from 101.5 Jamz. 6 p.m. Call 602-471-1841 for cover.
Séamus McCaffrey's Irish Pub
18 W. Monroe St.
Shamrock 'n' roll with music from Dan McGuinness, The Waters, and Tartanic, as well as select shot specials, $5 drafts, a traditional menu, and shuttle service to The Turf. 9 a.m.-2 a.m., free before 5 p.m. Call 602-253-6081.
The Shout! House
6770 N. Sunrise Blvd., Glendale
Dueling pianists will perform starting at 8 p.m. while bartenders will be pouring $5 Irish car bomb shots and Jameson. Patrons can also bring their own steins and get $5 green beers. 7 p.m. Call 623-772-1500.
15688 N. Pima Rd., Scottsdale
A ginormous tent will be erected in the parking lot and host Skeptical Chymist's annual Saint Patty's party, which will feature beer gardens, promo giveaways, live music from Capital Down and Javier Garcia, and plenty of revelry. 7 a.m.-2 a.m., $10 after 4 p.m. Call 480-609-8677.
8040 E. McDowell Rd., Scottsdale
This brand new Scottsdale spot will offer $5 Jameson and green beers, $4 Irish car bombs, and $3 Guinness. 11 a.m.-2 a.m. Call 602-334-5954.
9201 N. 29th Ave.
Irish rock and folk bands will perform on two different stages during this St. Paddy's Day Bash, including groups like The Celtic Growlers, The Biffos, and The Walkens. A traditional Irish breakfast will also be available at 8 a.m. Open until 2 a.m., $10 after 5 p.m. Call 602-997-2323.
Four Valley Locations
Off-the-hook outrageousness in planned at all four Tilted Kilts and will feature Irish food specials, live music, giveaways, corned beef and cabbage, and plenty of both Guinness and Jameson. 11 a.m.-2 a.m., $5 after 3 p.m. (or free with donation of five canned goods). Call 480-507-5458 or 480-592-0102.
2915 N. 68th St., Scottsdale
Fire up TT's killer jukebox with some The Pogues or The Replacements while partaking in drink specials. 7 p.m.-2 a.m. Call 480-990-9033.
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Yucca Tap Room
29 W. Southern Ave., Tempe
The beat-slingers of The Blunt Club present their weekly hip-hop hootenanny. Special guests include DJ Radar, Tricky T, and Kris Tha Fist. 9 p.m., free. Call 480-967-4777.