Email Author Robert Nelson

Awards

• 2006 - AAN AltWeekly Awards, published February 24, 2005

  "Cross to Bare"

• 2006 - Arizona Press Club Awards, published October 13, 2005

  "Mold Attacks!"

• 2006 - Arizona Press Club Awards, published July 7, 2005

  "Altar Ego"

• 2006 - Arizona Press Club Awards, published August 25, 2005

  "Hardball"

• 2006 - Arizona Press Club Awards, published April 21, 2005

  "About Face"

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2002 Stories by Robert Nelson

• Jail Bait

  published December 26, 2002

  Jefferson Davis McGee was not the man who raped and killed 8-year-old Elizabeth Byrd. But on May 28, 2001, McGee was beaten to the brink of... More >>

• Revelations

  published December 12, 2002

  Six months ago, I received an impassioned e-mail from a woman in south Chandler. She was responding to a column I had written a week earlier about... More >>

• Fire

  published December 5, 2002

  Eliza Ranger felt the poison before she smelled it. She was half-dozing while watching the evening news in her living room when her heart started... More >>

• Heart Failure

  published December 5, 2002

  Two months ago, Mike Schatz thought his boss, Gary Carpaneto, was a pretty good guy. Carpaneto had generally been cordial for the three years... More >>

• Hard Ball

  published November 28, 2002

  My son's baseball coach, although a wonderful shortstop, is a remarkably bad pitcher. The 9- and 10-year-olds standing around him can throw more... More >>

• Life Interrupted

  published November 21, 2002

  You're wearing nothing but shorts and a shirt when police arrive at your door. The police cuff you in front of your children. You are hauled off... More >>

• Diary of a Madman, Part 2

  published November 14, 2002

  Last week I told you the story of how Sheriff Joe Arpaio and his chief deputy, David Hendershott, settled a political score by citing Joe Arizona... More >>

• Trick or Threat

  published November 7, 2002

  Like a serial killer, Joe Arpaio is getting cockier and dumber with each hit. This time, Arpaio cited Joe Arizona, the pitchman for... More >>

• Sniper

  published October 24, 2002

  I am thinking about the East Coast man who kills from afar. I am thinking he's an outcast who fantasizes about being a Marine sniper. I am... More >>

• Seeing Red

  published October 17, 2002

  St. Louis Cardinals manager Tony La Russa should be fired. He should be fired for threatening gang violence. He should be fired for inciting a... More >>

• Tax Broke

  published September 26, 2002

  If you're wondering how your state could spend so little on critical services yet still collapse into a budget crisis, look no further than this... More >>

• Goon Squad

  published September 19, 2002

  Cops call it "building the jacket." If you've got a guy you want to ruin, you start throwing crazy allegations at him or start listening to... More >>

• Guys with small Penises

  published September 12, 2002

  Advice columnist Amy Alkon had a delicious secret. In her spare time, she'd been actively insulting the owners of sport utility... More >>

• Porn U

  published September 5, 2002

  The young lovers came from different sides of the tracks. Brian Buck (his real name) was a hardworking, hard-partying member of Arizona State... More >>

• Goober-natorial

  published August 29, 2002

  Alfredo Gutierrez is one of Arizona's greatest living statesmen. In contrast, Janet Napolitano, his rival in the Democratic primary for... More >>

• The Pain of Publicity

  published August 22, 2002

  He was a hellion in his teens and twenties but has since grown into a solid husband and father. He served in the Marines, which helped steel... More >>

• 'Roid Warrior

  published August 15, 2002

  Bob Clapp says his testicles are perfectly plump, thank you, and his wife of 44 years back in the kitchen is willing to attest that he is far from... More >>

• Walking While Black

  published August 8, 2002

  David James is a black man. Ginger Mattox is a white woman. In the fall of 1998, Phoenix police officers pulled over Ginger Mattox as she... More >>

• Moral Minority

  published July 25, 2002

  In a stunning and welcome reversal, Bishop Thomas O'Brien is now apparently cooperating with the Maricopa County Attorney's investigation of the... More >>

• Monsoon Madness

  published July 18, 2002

  QUESTION: When a monsoon comes and floods the roads, should I drive through the water? ANSWER: Yes. Your vehicle is equipped... More >>

• Lost Boys

  published June 27, 2002

  The road began from Highway 60 as an inviting blacktop, with the greasy coal black of new asphalt and a tight, bright yellow line down the middle.... More >>

• Apocalypse How?

  published June 20, 2002

  Imagine the western United States without power for six months. No computers, no phones, no air-conditioning, no refrigeration, no... More >>

• Strike Out

  published June 13, 2002

  July 4. Independence Day. At Bank One Ballpark, the World Series champs will take on home-run king Barry Bonds and his San Francisco Giants... More >>

• Scales of Injustice

  published June 6, 2002

  Hangin' County Attorney Rick Romley has a message to any citizen who gets behind the wheel of a vehicle: If you accidentally injure... More >>

• Blame Game

  published May 30, 2002

  As most bishops nationwide begin digging themselves out from the avalanche of priest sex scandals, Bishop Thomas O'Brien seems intent on digging... More >>