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2006 Stories by Stephen Lemons

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  • AZPunk Pissants

    published Nov 07, 2006

    KR, livin' the life... Like you need more proof that the 'tards at AZPunk.com are, for the most part, complete fucking, no-talent losers, obsessed with dragging down anyone who rises abo... More >>

  • Katie Rose Fan Club

    published Nov 06, 2006

    Don't listen to the haters, Katie... Why do the dillweeds on AZ Punk.com so despise startender, party-person & all-around hot babe Katie Rose? Is it 'cause she's attained a level of fam... More >>

  • Lack of Vision Thing

    published Nov 06, 2006

    Manet, doing what she does best: Cutting fucking ribbons. Len "Premarital" Munsil may be headed for certain defeat (picture a surfer heading into a tsunami), but the fella made an excell... More >>

  • Bob Goldwater Croaks

    published Nov 04, 2006

    A photo of the Bobster, from a 1977 New West article... Expect the usual, tired civic-booster blowjob-ism from most other local media on the news of Barry's bro Bob Goldwater heading for t... More >>

  • Wacky Signage

    published Nov 04, 2006

    You're nobody till somebody loves you... OK, so after Tuesday, all of those bloody political signs will be headed for the closest landfill, so let's have fun with them while there's stil... More >>

  • Nowicki Knows Best

    published Nov 03, 2006

    Not Doug MacEachern, or so he says... Dan Nowicki at the Repug's Plugged In blog mentioned my post about his paper's fetish for reporter mug shots in a humorous retort on Thursday, and Do... More >>

  • Clintonmania

    published Nov 03, 2006

    Give 'em hell, Tiger... The Prez, up close and personal... Learned about the Clinton-Pederson-Mitchell rally on Hayden Lawn at ASU at the last minute today and sped like ... More >>

  • Sun Devil Xess

    published Nov 02, 2006

    The girl next door -- you wish! The premier issue of this freebie mag XESS features a six page interview and photo spread on former ASU cheerleader and newbie porn queen Courtney Simpson... More >>

  • Damnit, Manet...

    published Nov 02, 2006

    The truth would set her free... This week's Bird tackles the icky issue of Governor Janet Napolitano's sexuality (Birdlink). Personally, I don't think the woman has sex, not even with hers... More >>

  • Reality Check

    published November 2, 2006

    This brazen beak-bearer can't wrap its head feathers around why Zona press weenies are so scared of discussing whether Governor Janet... More >>

  • I Luv EWE...

    published Nov 01, 2006

    Would've made a great Holloween costume for LDJ... Remember Leroy Donald Johnson -- the deputy Mesa fire chief who got popped for slipping it to his neighbor's lamb? The Bird squawked ab... More >>

  • Criminal Intent

    published Nov 01, 2006

    Mayor Goober and his Crime Czar, Tickle Me Elmo. Remember Mayor Phil "Pipsqueak" Gordon's front-porch bench program -- you know, that lame-ass Mayberry-esque initiative where people were... More >>

  • I shot the Sheriff

    published Nov 01, 2006

    Dangerously cute: A bonus pic of Paula... Arpaio with major babeage, including Hell on Heelster Paula Monarch (right). OK, so I know Sheriff Joe's a mean SOB, and has don... More >>

  • Whoa, doood...

    published Nov 01, 2006

    Republicans would be so much happier if they'd just toke up, dood... PC Friday is like one part Al Franken's Stuart Smalley and two-parts Cheech and Chong. It's freakin' hi-larious. Every ... More >>

  • Libertarian Love-fest

    published Nov 01, 2006

    My hero... I'm sure y'all will be accusing me of going gay for Libertarians after this post, but I have to say, I'm inclined to vote for Barry Hess, the Libertarian candidate for governo... More >>

  • V for Vendetta

    published Nov 01, 2006

    Not Ernie Hancock... Ernie Hancock is one wacky mofo. He's currently running for Secretary of State, but he won't be voting in the November 7 election. Why? Because he believes the whole... More >>

  • Repugnant Mugs

    published Nov 01, 2006

    Milk-curdling: Ferret face MacEachern... There's a reason why print journos don't do the evening news -- 'cause generally their homely mugs could curdle cartons of fresh milk. (Save for you... More >>

  • Mesa Muttonhead

    published October 19, 2006

    God bless state Representative Russell "White Pride" Pearce. Yep, this nutty nightingale must give thanks a month before Turkey Day for... More >>

  • Goldwater Uncut

    published October 19, 2006

    It's one of those yarns that reeks of cigarette butts, aftershave and spilt whiskey. The sort of titillating anecdote graying, well-connected... More >>

  • McCain Shame

    published October 12, 2006

    These days, with the GOP in free-fall and America's 51st state (better known as Iraq) a bloody neocon nightmare, who's waiting in the wings... More >>

  • Shrine Whine

    published October 5, 2006

    Oh, how the worm's turned on the AZ 9/11 Memorial since this early bird first tweeted on the subject way before the freakin' thing was ever... More >>

  • The Shop Keeper

    published September 28, 2006

    Turntablist-promoter Al Page rocks the party hard on Saturdays with his underground hip-hop night The Shop at Hidden House. Packed so tight... More >>

  • Fully Loaded

    published September 28, 2006

    Wanna make starving artists weep? Tell 'em about Thomas Pomeroy: The Republican millionaire gun collector co-owns the snazzy Biltmore club... More >>

  • Caribbean Queen

    published September 28, 2006

    Chef Eulet King's smile is as warm and inviting as a Bob Marley tune — think "Three Little Birds," with the line, "Don't worry 'bout a... More >>

  • Da Mayor's Debacle

    published September 21, 2006

    The Bird's been crowin' like a rooster after an all-nighter in the henhouse over the spanking Scottsdale voters gave the pro-Proposition... More >>

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