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2011 Stories by Wynter Holden

Archives: 2012 | 2011 | 2010 | 2009 | 2008 | 2007 | 2006 | 2005
  • Religious Experience

    published September 15, 2011

    Media hype makes all fundamentalist Mormon men out to be pedophiles or players, while their women are cast as pitiable victims in dowdy dresses.... More >>

  • Silence of the Lamb

    published December 29, 2011

    You’ve heard the story before: Poor little orphan girl is whisked away by a rich benefactor who lavishes her with gifts, fine clothes,... More >>

  • Junk Band

    published December 29, 2011

    There’s no shame in using household items for something other than their intended purpose. Perhaps you sing in the shower with a... More >>

  • Toy Story

    published December 22, 2011

    Imitation may be the sincerest form of artistic flattery, but a copy is always better when it’s adulterated. Take Warhol’s... More >>

  • Criminal Mind

    published December 22, 2011

    Modern forensic technology may have helped to exonerate the West Memphis Three and send the Baseline Killer to Death Row, but there are limits... More >>

  • Nativity Ploy

    published December 8, 2011

    Though each version of the traditional Hispanic pastorela is unique, there are a couple of things you can always expect to see:... More >>

  • The Hosts of Christmas Past

    published December 15, 2011

    Thanks to The Cable Guy, the public’s idea of a medieval feast involves gnawing greasy turkey legs and using the gross leftover... More >>


    published December 1, 2011

    Gay kids have it tough enough without mommy-bloggers outing their 5-year-olds and phone apps that determine kids’ sexual preferences. No... More >>

  • Sex, Lies, And Audio Tape

    published December 15, 2011

    Blackmail may have been effective in the days of Hitchcock and J. Edgar Hoover, but in the age of people blogging their sexcapades and posting... More >>

  • The Gospel Truth

    published December 1, 2011

    Nothing is sacred these days, not even nativity scenes. There are South Park parodies, nativity beer steins, and even holiday pranks that have... More >>

  • No Nudes is Good News

    published November 17, 2011

    When recently questioned about two nude self-portraits on his personal website, New York politician Stephen Eckel argued that... More >>

  • Board to Death

    published December 8, 2011

    Listing Monopoly and mahjong among your favorite tabletop games while at next February’s Vul-Con would be a death sentence for a gaming... More >>

  • Parental Warring

    published November 24, 2011

    Modern-day parents have their hands full, what with elementary school kids quoting True Blood and teens huffing refrigerator coolant. But the... More >>

  • Couplets Therapy

    published November 24, 2011

    The German poet Goethe said that, “science arose from poetry… when times change the two can meet again on a higher level as... More >>

  • Off-Color Scheme

    published November 3, 2011

    Admit it: You cringe every time a radio station plays the watered down “Forget You” version of Cee Lo Green’s catchy tune or... More >>

  • Crash and Burn

    published November 10, 2011

    Though some NASCAR drivers embrace a squeaky-clean image, others have figured out that nice guys really do finish last. Take top-ranked... More >>

  • Full Steam Ahead

    published November 10, 2011

    The Victorian era spawned discoveries that revolutionized the world, from electric power and photography to the first glass and iron building.... More >>

  • Community Spirits

    published November 3, 2011

    Thankfully, Tempe is free from 150-foot-tall marshmallow men and green ectoplasm blobs with bad manners. But there is something strange going... More >>

  • Dinner for Schmucks

    published October 20, 2011

    Imagine trapping Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie in a room with Jennifer Aniston and her baby-daddy hopeful of the month. Add a little vino to the... More >>

  • Witching Hour

    published October 27, 2011

    Thanks to all of the celeb gossip circulating recently, Halloween costumes are finally going beyond slutty cop and naughty nurse. Expect to see... More >>

  • Rider's Block

    published October 27, 2011

    The saying “art imitates life” is certainly true when it comes to adventure novelist Clive Cussler’s Dirk Pitt novels. Both... More >>

  • Blues Brother

    published October 13, 2011

    Flashback to the early '40s: A voluptuous Ella Fitzgerald strolls up to the mike and lays down a scat track in three octaves, accompanied by... More >>

  • Con Artists

    published October 6, 2011

    The stereotypical ex-con is a burly bruiser whose tattooed biceps are bigger around than Shakira’s thunder thighs. So it’s a bit of a... More >>

  • Every Witch Way

    published October 20, 2011

    Screw Shakespeare and his depiction of witches as old, ugly hags brewing potions from newt eyes and frog’s toes. These days, witches come... More >>

  • Civil Rites

    published October 13, 2011

    Pagan rights may have come a long way since the Salem witch trials, but there are still crackpots burning Harry Potter books and boycotting... More >>

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