BEST SLICE OF PIZZA - 2005
You were at Barcelona earlier, but the scandalous Scottsdale ho you were with started making out with this gross bald dude after you left her for five secs to go hit the head. Well, eff that beeahtch! And to think you wore your new Sean John for the outing, too. So you hop in the whip, and decide to call it a night, but Five-O gets on your tail and stays on it all the way to Old Town. You'd had a few monster-size mojitos back at Barcelona, and it's like the pigs can smell it on your breath a mile away. Somehow, you ditch 'em and you need some grub, maybe a slice of pepperoni pizza or sausage with black olives, just to help soak up the Bacardi, so you head over to the Slices on East Fifth Avenue, around the corner from Next. There's a serious scene there, with loads of fly squalies to eyeball as you munch your pizza and get sober. You hook up with your boy Tiny who just got out of ACME and smells like well liquor. Then Trina, who you left at Barcelona, texts you, wondering where you're at. But you don't even pay her no mind, and take another bite of your pizza and smile at one of the chickalinas next to you.
Ha! Damn, this pizza rocks!