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Best D-List Actor Freak-Out Phoenix 2013 - Jason London

You know you're a D-list actor when you have to tell the cops arresting you that you're a rich and famous actor, and then you have to add, "Fucking look me up, bitch!" That's what Jason London did in Scottsdale earlier this year, right before he took a steaming dump in the back of a Scottsdale police car. London, who's best known — excuse us, only known — for his role as Randall "Pink" Floyd in Dazed and Confused, sneezed in a guy's face at Martini Ranch in January and got tossed out after fighting with the guy and bar security, according to police. As the arresting officer drove London to jail, London continued to insult the cop — including, but not limited to, saying that his breath smelled like diarrhea — and at one point, London said the cop's car "smells like shit." The officer wrote in his report: "I looked back at him just in time for him to lean to the left and defecate in his pants. Then he said, 'I told you that I'm happy as shit!'"

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