The founding fathers really knew how to party. No, seriously. You won’t find it cataloged in any high school history books, but the patriots of yesteryear that helped form our nation – including John Adams, James Madison, and Thomas Jefferson – definitely knew how to bend an elbow in their day. (In fact, a farewell celebration for George Washington in 1787 included enough alcohol being consumed to get virtually the entire Continental Army drunk.)
And while they never included a specific constitutional amendment guaranteeing your right to party, they most certainly approved of tying a few on. So much so that we’re sure they’d give their approval to celebrating the birth of America during any of the rash of club nights, concerts, and pool parties that will happen over the Fourth of July weekend.
BroLoaf’s Annual Patriotic Meltdown at Yucca Tap Room
It truly wouldn’t be a Fourth of July weekend here in the Valley without this silly, satirical, and sloppy affair put on by the punks of BroLoaf and a few dozen of their friends. Words can’t even begin to describe the colorful and chaotic fun of the event, which celebrates the excesses of ‘Murica and has typically involved a cavalcade of messy and mirthful antics with confetti, cheerleaders, toilet paper, beer bongs, crotch thrusts, and American flags. Needless to say, it’s unlike any July Fourth party in Arizona. Oh, and there’s also a barbecue involved. This year’s edition of the meltdown takes place on Saturday, July 2, and will include performances by The Dark Hearts, HellRancho, Old Fashion Assassin, Nuclear Beach Party, and (of course) BroLoaf. We’d also be willing to bet that doppelgangers of both Donald Trump and Hillary Clinton will be involved somehow. The fun starts at 8 p.m. Admission is free.
IndepenDANCE Party at Cobra Arcade Bar
Video games, especially some of the coin-op classics available inside Cobra Arcade Bar, have a ton in common with patriotism and ‘Murica-style ideals. Several are centered on warfare or combat of some sort, involve protagonists that are armed to the teeth, or feature jingoistic themes or are all about guts and glory. (Hell, the Konami classic Contra is inspired, more or less, by the Reagan administration’s dabbling in Central American politics, while 1943: The Battle of Midway recreates a famed World War II-era conflict.) In other words, you'll just feel some old-fashioned American pride while playing the games at Cobra Arcade Bar during its IndepenDANCE Party on Friday, July 1. Local-DJ-made-good Fashen, who got his start in Valley clubs, will return to his hometown to spin dance music at the event along with Riot Earp. Frozen slushy cocktails will be served, and drink specials will also be available. Patriotic clothing and costumes are encouraged. The party begins at 9 p.m. No cover.
Tongue Tied’s America Eff Yeah! Dance Party at Linger Longer Lounge
All-American activities and trashy fun will be in abundance at the Linger Longer on Saturday, July 2, courtesy of Tongue Tied's DJ Roya and DJ Funkfinger. The two are throwing their annual “America Eff Yeah!” dance party at the hip haven, and will offer a mix of barbecue, brews, miniature flags, and other star-spangled silliness during the gonzo getdown. A patriotic costume competition will award $50 bar cards to the patron sporting the snazziest red, white, and blue ensemble. Live free and party hard starting at 9 p.m. The cover will be $5.
Fourth of July Weekend Birthday Bash at Wasted Grain
DJ Hazardous and a slew of local DJs will be in the mix inside Wasted Grain’s 100 Proof Lounge on Saturday, July 2, during this high-energy dance party. The lineup will also include such club scene favorites as DJ Chris Villa, DJ R3D, Nuck 'n Futz, Jeff Roach Scott, and Wasted Grain resident Mos Jeff. Doors open at 10 p.m., and there won’t be a cover.
Independence Day Weekend 2016 at W Scottsdale Hotel
The second-floor WET Deck will host a pair of high-style pool parties during the holiday weekend, each of which will offer high-end libations, DJs, and eye candy. To wit: The dance music duo Deux Twins are scheduled to perform at the W's first party of the weekend on Saturday, July 2, followed by the "Beauty and Beats" affair featuring Jessica Who, Saint Clair, and Sam Pace on Monday, July 4. Both start at noon and tickets are $20 for each event.
Freedom Fourth Pool Party at LUSTRE Rooftop Bar
The Hotel Palomar’s third-floor outdoor bar will offer the chance to possibly scope out some the fireworks shows filling Valley skies during Independence Day weekend, as well as a place to celebrate the holiday during a day-long pool party on Saturday, July 2. Highlights include a performance by local band Elvis Before Noon, beer samplings from 2 p.m. to 4 p.m., and DJ Mr. P-Body spinning dance music from 8 p.m. until midnight. Drink specials, games, prizes, and giveaways are also planned. The party starts at 11 a.m. and tickets are $15.
Trollphace & Lumberjvck at Monarch Theatre
Bursts of bass will be booming from the Monarch’s famed 30,000-watt PK Sound system over the holiday weekend when both Trollphace and Lumberjvck drop aggressive mixes of dubstep and drum 'n' bass on Saturday, July 2. Doors open at 9 p.m. General admission is $15 and VIP tickets (which include express entry and a commemorative lanyard) are $35.
Indie-Pendence at Crescent Ballroom
You might just hear such tracks as Pavement’s "No More Kings,” "A More Perfect Union" by Titus Andronicus, or “Independence Day” by the late Elliott Smith playing throughout the Crescent Ballroom’s lounge on Sunday, July 3. That’s because DJ Boris of Control! fame will fill the venue’s sound system with strictly indie-rock favorites during an evening-long event that starts at 9 p.m. and will also include a variety of the drink specials. As is the norm for most events in the lounge, there won’t be a cover.
RB Deep at Monarch Theatre
Unlike your average knuckle-dragging, immigrant-bashing Donald Trump supporter, we’re big believers in the theory of America being a giant melting pot where all are embraced, regardless of their particular nationality. It’s why we’re willing to welcome a cat like Argentinean-born DJ/producer Hernan Cattaneo when he visits the Valley on Sunday, July 3, to headline the Independence Day weekend edition of house music night RB Deep. Expect plenty of deep, progressive, and trippy house to fill the venue over the course of the evening, which kicks off at 9 p.m. Admission is $10.
Fourth of July Punk Rock Show at The Rebel Lounge
Traditionally, punk rock and patriotism aren’t two phrases that necessarily go together, given the art form’s anarchistic roots and general eschewing of jingoism during its 40-year history. However, that’s not stopping the punkers of such local acts as Buried in Red, The Dead Beat Hymns, The Lost Deposits, and Sad from celebrating the most patriotic holiday of 'em all on Monday, July 4, at The Rebel Lounge. Doors open at 8 p.m. Admission is free.
Paul Oakenfold at Talking Stick Resort
There’s definitely a bit of irony that the most American of holiday weekends will feature an invasion of sorts by British-born EDM godfather Paul Oakenfold. Thankfully, the party monsters in attendance at his high-profile gig headlining the Release Pool Party at Talking Stick Resort on Sunday, July 3, aren’t likely to take up arms against the living legend (or clamor about taxation without representation, for that matter). Instead, they’ll probably just dance, drink, or go for a dip. Gates open at 11 a.m. with sets by local DJs, followed by Oakenfold’s performance later in the afternoon. Tickets are $15. Fellow European Armin van Buuren will headline the Release pool party a day prior on Saturday, July 2, at the resort. Gates are at 11 a.m. and tickets are also $15.
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Dillon Francis at Maya Day and Nightclub