BRUTALLY FRANK: ROCK STARS VERSUS FRANK SINATRA: WHO DID IT HIS WAY FIRST?
So you think rock n' roll has fostered some pretty rough characters, eh? Some real wicked mothers, huh? Forget about it. Frank Sinatra did it bigger, badder, more atrociously and with more inspired outrage than any mere rock upstart. And he did it first, blazing a trail for the wanton lifestyle that few have been able to match. Pit your favorite mascara'd heathen against Ol' Blue Eyes and see who comes out on top. Or on the bottom!
HELLO YOUNG LOVER 1984 Rolling Stone Bill Wyman, 48, begins dating 13-year-old child Mandy Smith. They wed five years later. Divorce one year after that. Smith pursues a modeling career.
1964 Frank, 49, begins dating 19-year-old flower child Mia Farrow (I've got Scotch older than her," quips fellow Rat Packer Dean Martin). They wed two years later. Divorce one year after that. Farrow makes Rosemary's Baby.
AM TOO MISBEHAVIN' 1965 Angry Brit pop band The Who, opening for happy Brit pop band Herman's Hermits, shocks preteen U.S. concertgoers by destroying instruments onstage. Later, the group is known for tearing up hotel rooms.
1954 On a drunken bender with Robert Mitchum and Broderick Crawford, Frank annihilates his dressing room, ripping down walls and eviscerating telephones.
THE MAN WITH THE GOLDEN FIREARM 1993 Harry Connick Jr., Frank Lite for the rock generation, gets busted for carrying a concealed .44 magnum in a New York airport.
19?? Frank, well . . . that's kid stuff, baby!!
PAL FRANKIE 1968 Beach Boy Dennis Wilson brings music and mass murder together when he introduces house guest Charles Manson and "family" to industry types; Charlie ultimately--and unsuccessfully--tries to off producer Terry Melcher.
1960 Frank links the Mafia and the White House by introducing Judith Exner first to Jack Kennedy, then to underworld kingpin Sam Giancana; she begins sleeping with both men. I GET A KINK OUT OF YOU
1971 Members of Led Zeppelin tie a willing groupie to a bed and shove shark meat into her vagina.
1969 After an all-night party, Frank orders ham and eggs and proceeds to eat them off a prostitute's bare chest with a knife and fork--while listening to his own records! THE SHADOW OF YOUR BILE
1969 On a cold November morning, Paul McCartney chases down Life magazine photographers who've come to his Scotland farm to prove he's not dead. The cuddly Beatle douses them with water.
1951 Angry that reporters are hounding longtime flame Ava Gardner and him, Frank gets behind the wheel of a car for a little "human bowling." He succeeds in hitting one man's leg before driving off into the night. ONE FOR MY BABY
1967 When a young woman makes the foolish mistake of interrupting Elvis while he plays pool, the enraged King hurls his cue at her. Her breast is deformed for life.
1956 An angry, allegedly partying Frank throws a young girl through a plate-glass window, nearly severing her arm from her body. SET EM UP, JOE
1977 Drunk and waving a .357 magnum, Jerry Lee Lewis shoots bassist Norman "Butch" Owens in the chest.
1948 Frank and Ava Gardner get loaded in Palm Springs and go on a wild shooting spree, leaving windows and streetlights shattered and one innocent bystander's stomach grazed. Kooky!
FLY ME TO THE MOON. OR ELSE.
1983 A clause in Van Halen's rider states that they must never be served brown M&Ms. When candies of the offensive shade are inadvertently offered to them, the band stamps them into an expensive carpet, ruining it.
1950 Frank, besides incessantly washing his hands, keeps dropping his pants and kicking his underwear into the air. Some flunky must collect the briefs; the act supposedly occurs every 20 minutes.
NIGHT AND DAY 1990 Guns N' Roses manages to offend African Americans by using the dreaded "N" word in its offensive song "One in a Million."
1968 During a recorded live show in Vegas with Count Basie, Frank jokes to the audience that "the Polacks are deboning the colored people and using them for wet suits." Gesturing to Basie's band, he then thanks the NAACP for the chess set it sent him. Later, he opines that in a top hat, Sammy Davis Jr. "looked like a headwaiter in a rib joint." (Ironically, earlier that year, Frank invited Black Panthers into his home while stumping for Hubert Humphrey.)
1977 Ike Turner goes on a different kind of hit parade, pulverizing wife Tina with a telephone receiver.
1966 After dinner at the swank Polo Lounge in Beverly Hills, Frank begins by throwing insults, then goes "all the way" and lobs a telephone at the president of Hunt's Foods, Frederick Weisman, fracturing his skull. Reach out and touch someone, indeed!
THE WAY YOU LOOK TONIGHT 1966 The Rolling Stones dress in drag for the cover of their "Have You Seen Your Mother, Baby" single.
1963 Frank, ever mindful of middle-age spread, takes to wearing a woman's corset.
COME SIGN WITH ME 1968 The Beatles become the first rock group to own their own label, Apple. The stable of "talent" includes the Black Dyke Mills Band, Radha Krsna Temple, Yoko Ono and James Taylor.
1961 Savvy Frank signs the Kinks, Count Basie, and pals Dean Martin and Sammy Davis Jr. to his Reprise label. When he later joins forces with Warner Bros., he'll snag Jimi Hendrix, the Fugs, Joni Mitchell, Neil Young and Tiny Tim!
THANK HEAVEN FOR LITTLE GIRLS? Late 1960s Rock stars Brian Wilson and Papa John Phillips father daughters who will later form the God-awful pop-treacle trio Wilson Phillips. The group has five Top 40 hits.
1940 Frank spawns go-go-boot-shod goddess Nancy Sinatra, who has six Top 40 hits on her own as well as several hit duets with dad. Something stupid? No way! THE JOKER IS WILD
1967 Shortly after recording "Light My Fire," stoned prankster Jim Morrison breaks into the studio after hours, grabs a fire extinguisher and sprays the recording console, a rented harpsichord and Robby Krieger's guitar.
1956 Frank swipes Hollywood power broker Swifty Lazar's hat and serves it to him under poached eggs!
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