10 Songs That Prove Future Is The Ramones of Rap
Future at Coachella.
Popular music is full of one-trick ponies. From Chubby Checker turning every song into a version of "The Twist" to Motorhead and The Ramones thrashing out the same speedy guitar riffs over and over again, we forgive them for playing the same song because it's one hell of a great song. It's like Prince said, there's joy in repetition.
Future clearly subscribes to the “if it ain't broke, let it keep printing money” school of thought.
A prolific musician, he's released a preposterous number of albums and mixtapes over the last few years (only Young Thug can compete with him for the “Damn, guys, slow down” trophy). And on each of those albums, you know exactly what to expect: Future's cold voice, slow and slippery as syrup, rapping about sex, money, and getting obliterated by Xanax, Percocet, and molly.
Like all pharmaceuticals, Future's songs are based on a formula. But like all good drugs, who cares if one song is like all the others when they're this good? The Crown Prince of Pill Popping has cooked up an arsenal of hits that will get any crowd moving, and he'll be dealing out his stash of bangers when he comes to Phoenix on June 28.
And yes, before you bring it up: He doesn't always rap about popping pills. Sometimes he raps about his personal problems, and occasionally he raps really fast to remind you that he's not permanently stuck in narcoleptic trap mode. Sometimes The Ramones sang about Reagan and Christmas, but that didn't stop them from also having a bajillion songs that started with “I Don't Wanna” in the titles.
All the hallmarks of the Future style are here. Talking about Xans? Check. Sounding like he's checked out on Xans? Yep. Boasting about Puerto Rican freakin' and getting exotic broads soakin' wet? Roger that. And despite being the center of a pill-fueled, bacchanalian orgy, Future sounds like he couldn't even be bothered to be there? Of course, it wouldn't be a Future song if he sounded into it.
In case you were wondering, Perkys is not the nickname for a childhood buddy of Future's. Nor is it the name of some strip club with a Porky's theme. Perkys is drugs, people.
“The Percocet & Stripper Joint"
Percocets and strippers: the chocolate and peanut butter that is a Future Reese's Peanut Butter Cup. There is no commercial showing us how Future eats a Reese's Peanut Butter Cup, because every Future song is a commercial explaining how Future eats a Percocet and stripper's Butter Cup.
You may be thinking you're in for something different because there's a flute. But no. It's raining molly and Perkys in the chorus. That flute is pretty rad, though.
Two one-trick ponies prancing on the same track. While The Weeknd does his Cocaine Michael Jackson schtick, Future raps some mushmouth about molly and Xans. But to reiterate from earlier: When the trick is this good, who cares if they do it over and over again?
“I Serve The Base”
A song that lives up to his name, “I Serve The Base” sounds like the kind of rap music that Martian teenagers listen to. It's a brilliant cutting-edge beat and one of Future's most compelling zonked-out performances. But in case you're wondering, “The Base” is not a reference to “All Your Base Are Belong To Us.” It's just drugs. Again.
Speaking of geek references that aren't there: This song is not a hard-as-fuck banger about Draco Malfoy. Future is too into his drug talk to let anything slip about his Hogwarts house affiliation. My guess is he's a Ravenclaw.
One of Future's earlier classic jams. The most notable thing about this song is that he sounds half-awake for most of it. Maybe he mixed a Five Hour Energy into his cup of lean.
"Thought It Was A Drought"
If “I just took a piss and I seen codeine comin' out” isn't the most Future-ish thing that Future has ever said, I don't know what is.
Whoa. Future sounds wide awake for this one. One of his few sex songs where he actually sounds like he wants to have sex. My ears are not prepared to deal with an enthusiastic Future. That's like listening to The Ramones do slowcore. What has the world come to?
Future will be performing with Migos on Wednesday, June 28, at Ak-Chin Pavilion in Phoenix. Tickets are still available and can be purchased via Live Nation.
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