Happy 4th of July -- Avoid These Five Overplayed Patriotic Songs

Lana del Rey: your new national anthem.
Lana del Rey: your new national anthem.

What better way to celebrate the nation's birthday than taking a day off. Or, as Homer Simpson would agree, "Celebrate your country's independence by blowing up a small part of it" (we mean fireworks, duh). You've probably earned a day off, so have a beer or five, eat some barbecue, and watch some fireworks. You have a long day of partying ahead of you, necessitating a good playlist. There are some decent 4th of July/American pride songs out there, but here are the five that irk us the most -- and chances are you'll hear a few of them if you go out to celebrate today.

Lana Del Rey -- National Anthem

While it's cool to see Lana impersonate Marilyn Monroe and Jackie O, watching A$AP Rocky get his brains blown out a la JFK may ruffle some feathers. Plus, if "Video Games" becomes our new national anthem, we're a little terrified.

Bruce Springsteen -- Born in the U.S.A.

There's usually no such thing as too much Springsteen. In fact, I'd applaud you for playing the album

Born in the U.S.A.

in its entirety. The title track is a great song, but so is the rest of the album. Rather than listening to this as background music during the televised Boston fireworks, how about lighting some sparklers and dancing like an idiot to "No Surrender" and "Dancing in the Dark"?


Miley Cyrus -- Party in the U.S.A.

Because everyone will be partying in the U.S.A., get it? Though Miley makes us wonder whether the holiday would be a bit more enjoyable if Jay-Z was playing every time we got in a taxi . . . Wouldn't it be fun to roll to the Tempe Beach Park or Steele Indian School Park fireworks displays while blasting "On to the Next One" or "99 Problems"? We've got 99 problems and Miley ain't one. Also, ignore the memo and don't wear stilettos today.

Katy Perry -- Firework

You're bound to see some fireworks today, so why not watch them come out of Katy Perry's boobs? Isn't that what 'Merica is all about? But really, think about it, calling somebody a firework is fairly offensive. She's saying that said person is all show and burns out in a big, dazzling display.

Lee Greenwood -- God Bless the USA

This one's the worst. Don't get me wrong, it's one of the most patriotic songs you can hear, but do we really need to hear it every single year before the "1812 Overture"? In fact, we highly recommend that you party with Tchaikovsky instead . . . or check out

South Park's lovely spoof

(full episode!) of this type of country music.

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