Be honest: You've had a sip. You know what I'm talking about--you've taken a little tug from that sweet, refreshing Obama Kool-Aid. It's OK -- most of us have. And things will hit a fever pitch today, what with the inauguration and the excitement over you-know-who taking off for pastures more Texan and less Presidential. To commemorate your crush, here are the 5 most ludicris, over-the-top pieces of Obama gear that the most balls-out loyalists should own:
Oh yes, you read right: Ojamas. When the audacity of hope just isn't enough, there's always the audacity of sleep. They come in the two-piece button down variety, but I prefer the ridiculously unsexy nightgown, which will guarantee that you pay homage to your favorite Commander-in-Chief and will also guarantee that you will never get laid.
2. Head O State: The Official Obama Pleasure Toy
Getting any will be the least of your problems with the Head O State, which employs the tagline, "You love your candidate...let him love you back!" The face carved into the toy bares a distubingly striking resemblance to Barry O., so much so that if you do decide to try one, you might have to watch your back--Michelle will cut you.
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3. Obama personalized urinal cake
Let's face it--nothing says "class" like peeing on the likeness of the leader of the free world. Peepeeface.com knows this, which is why they've created the Obama urinal cake, and are now selling them for the bargain basement price of $4.95 each. You still might have to save up your pennies, though--the Joe Biden urinal cake is $7.95.
4. A print of Barack Obama nude on a unicorn
Oh Dan Lacey, you wily SOB. You took all of our collective fantasies about our hunky president, put paintbrush to canvas, and just let inspiration take hold. I think I can speak for America when I say we will never look at out beloved Barack the same way again. Bravo, Dan Lacey. Bravo.
5. The "Yes We Can" Opener
You just can't beat a good Obama pun. It simply can't be done. And so, we present to you the "Yes We Can" can opener. It will never cease to be absolutely effing hilarious.