The sendoff rally for the Arizona Cardinals is set for Friday morning at Sky Harbor International Airport, and the Cards want you there.
The Cardinals are heading to New Orleans to face the Saints on Saturday afternoon, and the team is inviting fans to come to the airport for a pep rally to get them ready for the game. The only problem is that fans will have to endure what are sure to be awful speeches from politicians as they awkwardly cheer on the home team.
Need we remind anyone of Janet Napolitano at the Phoenix Suns pep rally a few years back? Nappy's manly, monotone, sendoff made us drowsier than a stomach full of Ambien.
On hand for this year's sendoff will be Governor Jan Brewer, Phoenix Mayor Phil Gordon, and Glendale Mayor Elaine Scruggs. As our, um, fearless leaders try to work the crowd into a frenzy, we can only anticipate a level of phony voice inflection that certain to make everyone in the crowd more uncomfortable than a hooker in church.
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We may be wrong, however. Perhaps Mayor Phil will entertain the crowd with his best Mr. Bean impression, and there's always Jan Brewer's voice to get the crowd going, which can best be described as "cigarette, um, sexy?"
Thankfully it's not just political hacks slated to speak at this year's rally. Also on the bill are the Cards cheerleaders, the Cardinals mascot -- Big Red -- and Coach Ken Whisenhunt.
The rally is scheduled to begin at 10 p.m. at the east end of Sky Harbor, near the 24th Street and Buckeye Road entrance.