A Peoria man, wrongly accused of stealing a hat at a local water park, handled the false accusation by attempting to moon his accusers in the middle of the park. But he failed, and by the time it was over, the only people exposed to the man's ass were five innocent bystanders.
According to court documents obtained by New Times, 21-year-old Jay Searles was at the Wet and Wild Water Park in Phoenix last Sunday, when he was approached by management and accused of stealing a lifeguard's hat earlier in the day.
Searles denied stealing the hat so management asked him to empty his pockets.
Searles declined. Rather, he dropped trou in an attempt to moon his accusers but failed to get the job done.
For a mooning to be successful, the person you're trying to moon needs to actually see your ass. That didn't happen in Searles' case.
After dropping his pants -- when he should have turned his tail toward the intended targets of the mooning -- Searles just ran out of the park.
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His mooning didn't go unnoticed, though. Two women, a 17-year-old girl, and two children standing near the site of the failed insult got a full view of Searles' backside. One woman claims to have seen some testicles, too.
Cops caught up with Searles as he was running out of the park. He admitted he was attempting to moon the park's employees but got "cold feet" and scampered off.
He's been charged with two felony counts of indecent exposure, three misdemeanor counts of indecent exposure, and one count of disorderly conduct.
Such serious charges are ridiculous, if you ask us. But the moral of the story: keep your ass to yourself.