We tuned into Police Women of Maricopa County last night and, as we predicted, it didn't take long for the jowls of America's self-proclaimed "toughest sheriff" to pop on the screen.
It was only about 10 minutes into the show when Sheriff Joe Arpaio made a cameo appearance, which basically set the tone of the entire program -- that tone being disrespect, abusive attitude, and overkill.
The show airs a segment of a press conference Joe gave, where, in no uncertain terms, he makes it clear that if "you come into Maricopa County, you will be arrested, so I advise you go somewhere else."
The Maricopa County Tourism Board's gotta love this guy.
The rest of the show seemed to demonstrate what we've been saying about Joe's goons for years: they're nuts.
Take Detective Deb Moyer, for example.
Moyer got into a high-speed pursuit of a guy wanted for a speeding ticket and not paying a $1,200 fine.
The guy speeds back to his house, where Moyer and several other officers -- one with a machine gun -- bash in the door, throw out a pregnant woman, and drag him naked out of the shower, where he was trying to hide.
Not before he was Tasered, of course.
After zapping the suspect twice, the officers take the man to jail wearing nothing but a towel.
"I just got done wrestling a naked guy trying to put cuffs on him," Moyer says after the bust. "Who does that in their job?"
High-priced hookers, that's who.
Then there's Deputy Kelly Bocardo, the apparent bitch-of-the-ball, who can be directly quoted as saying, "I have the attitude that I will definitely give you an ass-beating if you need one" and "if I have to give you an ass-beating, so be it."
The only "ass-beating" we saw Bocardo dish out was the tongue-lashing of a woman, who had to be pushin' 80-years-old.
While trying to extract a 2-month-old baby from the woman's custody, she drew a gun on the ancient and the baby as the two sat parked in a car in the woman's garage.
Once Bocardo realized there wasn't too much of a threat coming from the infant and the geriatric woman, she switched from her pistol to her Taser.
The old woman wasn't some crusty old meth-head, either. She more resembled a cast member of The Golden Girls girl living in a nice neighborhood.
Bocardo was taking the child because her father was a convicted sex-offender, but he was nowhere in sight.
"Your actions right now just caused me to draw a gun on a 2-month-old child," Bocardo tells the elderly woman after dragging her out of the car.
The woman responds by saying, "I realize that, but that was a stupid thing for you to do in the first place -- pull a gun on a 2-month-old."
In Bocardo's defense, it's hard to dish out proper "ass-beatings" without pullin' a piece.
After the bust, Bocardo is back at a sheriff's sub-station, where two county jail inmates are washing her car, while decked out in the standard, striped prison garb and pink undies.
Bocardo says she loves the pink underwear because "it makes them feel like less of a man."
Imagine if a male cop said something like that about a female inmate -- the National Organization for Women would have a field day.
The over-the-top show didn't end there.
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The next segment follows Detective Moyer again, as she goes to arrest a guy who wasn't paying his child support -- her and about five other officers.
As the suspect points out: "Six officers showed up for a civil warrant?"
God forbid a few of those officers spend any time trying to serve some of Maricopa County's legendary felony warrants.
Tune in next week -- same "ass- beating" time, same "ass-beating" station.