Convinced that cabals of international terrorists want him dead, Maricopa County Sheriff Joe Arpaio has ordered and obtained a $70,000 armored car to assure his safe passage through our mean streets. The car, a special 1999 Oldsmobile Delta 88, was "hardened" by a Canadian company. New Times obtained these top secret specifications by submitting a Freedom of Information request to Canadian officials, who, unlike Arpaio and his subordinates, actually obey laws. Arpaio's employees have already dubbed the auto "The Jokemobile.
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