It's as if jolly ol' Saint Nick himself laid a massive Yule log right in front of my Xmas fir with a missive ordering me to burn, baby, burn. Sure, this time of year, most good little boys and girls are having sugarplum dreams of iPods and Xboxes, but I'd rather have a stocking full of switches with which to birch some peddler of vile victuals. For most people, Santa's a corpulent, sleigh-bound clown spreading holiday cheer and reindeer droppings worldwide on the night before that ancient pagan fete of December 25. But for this sinful scribbler, Santa is an anagram for Satan, and all I long for is another deserving victim for... More >>>
Carumba humbug: Lemons was hoping for a bad meal for Xmas, but received a sumptuous Latin spread instead.