In a parallel universe that gets everything wrong, Buzz Osborne and Dale Crover would be capping the Melvins' first quarter-century mulling over whether to wear tuxes or L.A. Dodgers jerseys to their Rock and Roll Hall of Fame induction ceremony. Melvins albums would've become progressively slicker and more pedestrian over time, but each would've sold appreciably better than the last. By virtue of just hanging in there, they'd have achieved that bland legendary status bequeathed on people like Billy Joel and Jon Bon Jovi. We'd learn in their tearful induction speech by Eric Clapton that late Atlantic Records co-founder Ahmet Ertegun wrote a letter on his deathbed to Jann... More >>>