10 Most Creative Smuggling Attempts at the U.S./Mexico Border | Valley Fever | Phoenix | Phoenix New Times | The Leading Independent News Source in Phoenix, Arizona
Navigation

10 Most Creative Smuggling Attempts at the U.S./Mexico Border

If you had to pick one word to describe the smugglers who try to sneak drugs and other items over the U.S./Mexico border every day, that word is "creative."Smugglers take drastic measures to get their product into the United States, while trying to avoid detection by officers at the border...
Share this:

If you had to pick one word to describe the smugglers who try to sneak drugs and other items over the U.S./Mexico border every day, that word is "creative."

Smugglers take drastic measures to get their product into the United States, while trying to avoid detection by officers at the border. Check out our list of the 10 most creative, but failed, attempts to smuggle something over the border we've seen in recent years:

10.) Methy Cans of Corn

Fourteen-year-old kid with a bag of groceries? Think again, rookie -- this kid had six pounds of meth, plus a little coke, sealed inside of cans of corn. A lot of people try to stash drugs in produce, but that usually happens in the big 18-wheelers, not a kid with a sack of canned corn.



9.) Buckets of Chicken: Half Original Recipe, Half Meth

Two women on a bus crossing the border appeared to be extremely hungry -- they each had their own bucket of fried chicken. When authorities checked out the bus, they noticed that underneath the layer of greasy fried chicken was three pounds of meth in each bucket.




8.) McDonald's Delivers?

If it seems a little weird that a guy in a McDonald's uniform would be carrying a McDonald's drink and bag through a port of entry, you would be correct. The 22-year old, now-former McD's employee said he just had fries in his bag, but it turned out that he was trying to smuggle $50,000 cash into Mexico.



7.) Cocaine in the Gym Bag

People usually go to great lengths to hide drugs in their car, usually fabricating a false compartment in an attempt to avoid detection. Not this guy. He just put 13 pounds of coke in his gym bag, and tossed it in the backseat. Now that we think about it, we're not sure if this guy is creative, or just dim-witted.


6.) Just Drive Over the Border Fence

Build the dang fence, huh? Then smugglers build a dang ramp to go over the dang fence. The problem with this attempt was that the ramp was too steep, and the Jeep got stuck at the peak, so all these hopeful smugglers did was lose their method of transportation.




5.) Piñatas: Good for Fiestas, Bad for Hiding Weed

Here's the thing about piñatas -- they're supposed to be filled with things. New Times has documented multiple border busts involving piñatas, including a guy who didn't even fill them with weed -- he used them to hide a false wall in the trailer of his big-rig, where he hid his stash.



4.) Weed Catapult

For approximately 2,500 years, humans have known that catapults can be used to fling things -- drug smugglers are no exception. However, there have been several advances in engineering since the catapult was invented . . .


3.) Upgrade: Weed Cannon

Catapults are child's play to the guys who invented the weed cannon. Authorities didn't actually find the weed cannon, but found a carbon-dioxide tank, as well as cans of weed that slammed pretty hard into dirt, several hundred feet over the border in Yuma. Border officers estimated the cannons could shoot the weed cans about 500 feet.


2.) Belly-Buttons Are Holes, Too

The belly-button is an often-ignored hole, especially if you've got a crater big enough to stuff something in there. Sure enough, after finding a couple pounds of heroin strapped to a guy's waist, officers also noticed he had a smaller stash stuffed into his belly-button.




1.) Vaginas Can Only Hold So Much Meth

Speaking of holes, a woman was just found a couple weeks ago with a pound of meth in her vagina. The stash was not staying in place very well, as officers -- already suspicious of the woman's behavior -- saw part of a condom hanging out of her shorts. The package didn't want to come out completely, so the woman had to be hospitalized so it could be removed by a doctor.


Send feedback and tips to the author.
Follow Matthew Hendley on Twitter at @MatthewHendley.


KEEP NEW TIMES FREE... Since we started New Times, it has been defined as the free, independent voice of Phoenix, and we'd like to keep it that way. Your membership allows us to continue offering readers access to our incisive coverage of local news, food, and culture with no paywalls. You can support us by joining as a member for as little as $1.