In an effort to prevent patriotic mishaps, we've decided to offer up safety tips on how not to handle your new-found explosive endeavors.
5. The Sledgehammer technique:
Is there a better way to light fireworks than the use of a sledgehammer? Apparently these guys didn't think so. Please, just use matches instead -- they're a lot lighter and don't involve broken toes if you miss.
4. In a bathtub:
We advise you to light your fireworks in the backyard, or at least outside. Why is the bathtub not a good place for pyrotechnic displays of stupidity? Well, just watch the video.
3. Lighting fire with fire:
While an obvious don't-do to some, others need a reminder. When lighting your fireworks, don't use a preexisting flame -- stay away from bonfires, especially.
2. Know when enough is enough:
We recommend you limit your firework use to no more than 100 pops. That way you'll be able to impress your neighbors while still keeping all your limbs -- and your dignity.
1. Don't be a Jackass
You're not Ryan Dunn. Nor will you ever be a member of the Jackass crew. So please, don't try to be something your not. Keep the fireworks in the ground and out of your ass.
