White Boy Dash
Dear Gabacho,
You think hurling Osama bin Laden's name is tasteless? How about the Daily Mail columnist who, on the day England faced West Germany in the 1966 FIFA World Cup final, wrote, "West Germany may beat us at our national sport today, but that would be only fair. We beat them twice at theirs"? Or the hooligans who greeted Jewish fans during a Lazio-AS Roma Italian league match with a banner that read "Auschwitz is your town, the ovens are your houses"? This is soccer we're talking about, not Wimbledon. Offensive jeers are part of the game, and anyone who can't take the heat should leave la cocina. Jingoism is the main reason fútbol is the world's most popular sport and a global two minutes hate: Countries and regions can spill their aggression toward each other out on the pitch and in the stands instead of the battlefield. That's why Mexicans love to trash the United States when the two countries play. Ustedes exploit us, humiliate us, dominate us in every socioeconomic category, even beat us in soccer -- the United States has triumphed over Mexico in six of their last nine matches, including a 2-0 shellacking in the second round of the 2002 World Cup. So instead of wielding knives, our best revenge is the clever insult, the well-timed "Chinga tu madre" ("Go fuck your mother") whistle, the beer poured upon Landon Donovan as he triumphantly exits the stadium. All the great soccer-playing nations draw rabidly nationalistic fans, and the United States will remain a third-rate country until Americans cry "Tacos!" next time Mexico's squad invades el Norte.
I'm a bartender, and one of my customers told me MGD stands for Mexicans Getting Drunk. I take it there is a certain level of pride associated with drinking. Where does this originate in Mexican culture?
Spare Me Some Cutter, Hermano
Dear Gabacho,
I dunno -- let me go ask a Russian.
Got a spicy question about Mexicans? Ask the Mexican at [email protected]. And those of you who do submit questions: include a hilarious pseudonym, por favor, or we'll make one up for you!
