Jon Kyl

Jon Kyl's Not-the-DREAM-Act: Good Idea, Bad Idea, or Just a Waste of Time?

Republican Senators Jon Kyl and Kay Bailey Hutchison have offered a plan for some people brought to the United States illegally when they were young, and it's totally not the DREAM Act.Instead, it's the ACHIEVE Act, which the senators contend creates "no special pathway to citizenship." Based on how ... More >>

Top Ten Arizona Political Ads of 2012 (So Far)

I don't think anyone will bemoan the end of the 2012 election cycle, except perhaps the TV execs and political consultants who're making a killing off the political ads bombarding us through the boob tube. Still, quite a few are memorable, and there is nothing more American than reducing your oppo ... More >>

John McCain and Jon Kyl Named Among the "Worst of the Worst" for America's Middle Class

According to a group that calls itself a "strategy center for the progressive movement," Senators John McCain and Jon Kyl are the worst for the proverbial middle class.They're actually in a 19-way tie among Senators for being the "worst of the worst," which, as you can imagine coming from a progress ... More >>

Jon Kyl Accuses Obama Administration of Apologizing to Embassy Protesters, Goes Straight for the Rape Analogy

See also: Jon Kyl's Lies "Not Intended to be Factual Statement"Attention Senator Jon Kyl's press secretary: please re-send the statement clarifying that the senator's words are "not intended to be a factual statement." Kyl's getting attention now because he told a group of reporters that a press rel ... More >>

Jeff Flake Endorsed by John McCain and Jon Kyl; Wil Cardon's Still Stuck With Trent Franks

Republican U.S. Senators John McCain and Jon Kyl announced their endorsement of Congressman Jeff Flake for the Senate seat being vacated by Kyl.That brings Flake's tally of endorsements from sitting Senators to five, in addition to Congressman Paul Ryan and Louisiana Governor Bobby Jindal.Flake's pr ... More >>

Joe Arpaio's "Birther" Friends Quiz Arizona Politicos on Obama Eligibility, Nobody Cares

It looks like sympathizers to Sheriff Joe Arpaio's "birther" movement are still looking for politicians to support the Obama's-from-Africa conspiracy theory, and it's still not working.That's really not all that surprising, but the way Arizona politicians are issuing their awkward responses to "birt ... More >>

Jon Kyl's Attack on Online Poker and Livelihoods

Senators McCain and Kyl Offer Pussified Response to Joe Arpaio's Flubbed Sex-Crime Investigations

Senators Jon Kyl and John McCain are "concerned" about the 432 sex-crime investigations that were botched by Joe Arpaio's boys in beige.​Arizona senators Jon Kyl and John McCain today issued a joint statement saying they are "concerned" with the the Maricopa County Sheriff's Office's bungling of s ... More >>

Don Bivens, Former Democratic Party Chief, Announces Senate Candidacy

www.wikipedia.org Don Bivens is running for Senate.​Don Bivens, the former chairman of the Arizona Democratic Party, made it official this morning: he's running for the United States Senate.Bivens, a Phoenix-based attorney, announced on his campaign website this morning that he'll seek the Democra ... More >>

Senator Jon Kyl Says "Summer Home" Might be in Path of Wallow Fire -- Which is Actually a "Factual Statement"

Jon Kyl owns a home in Apache County: "factual statement."​Senator Jon Kyl was overheard today expressing concern about a summer home he claims to own that might be in the path of the Wallow fire raging in eastern Arizona.Given the senator's history with "factual statements," we decided ... More >>

Senator Jon Kyl's Press Secretary Admits the "Not Intended to be Factual Statement" Line Made No Sense

politico.com​Senator Jon Kyl's press secretary has taken the blame for the senator reporting "statistics" last week about Planned Parenthood he found in the land of make-believe, and later saying it "was not intended to be a factual statement." In case you missed it, Kyl completely BS'd the a ... More >>

Morning Poll: Is Senator Jon Kyl's Excuse Over "Factual Statements" Satisfactory?

Disclaimer: Jon Kyl's apology for lying about abortion statistics is "not intended to be a factual statement" -- or it is? ​Senator Jon Kyl issued a statement yesterday apologizing for his attempt to redefine lying by following a lie with the disclaimer that his statement was not "intended to be a ... More >>

Morning Poll: Best Non-"Factual Statement" About Senator Jon Kyl?

Jon Kyl is a card-carrying member of NAMBLA...#NotIntendedToBeAFactualStatement .​Senator Jon Kyl had some non-"factual statements" about Planned Parenthood that he spouted off on the floor of the U.S. Senate last week, most notably that 90 percent of the services the federally funded organization ... More >>

"Jon Kyl is One of Gaddafi's Sexy Female Ninja Guards," According to Stephen Colbert's Non-Factual Twitter-Town Crusade Against the Senator

www.time.comStephen Colbert invented "truthiness." Senator Jon Kyl redefined lying as a remark that's "not intended to be a factual statement." Colbert for Senate 2012.​Stephen Colbert, the late night dispenser of all things "truthiness," is continuing to wage war against Arizona Senator Jon Kyl o ... More >>

Senator Jon Kyl's Lies About Planned Parenthood "Not Intended to be Factual Statement"

www.persephonemagazine.comDisclaimer: whatever Senator Jon Kyl says is "not intended to be a factual statement."​As the United States government creeped closer to shutting down on Friday because far-right-wing-nuts don't like abortion, Senator Jon Kyl took to the Senate floor to give a less-than-" ... More >>

Congressman Trent Franks Won't Run for Senate. God Apparently Changed His Mind

Congressman Trent Franks is a no-go for the Senate seat being vacated by Senator Jon Kyl.​God, apparently, is a little indecisive.Despite having indicated earlier in the week that he would announce his plans to run for the Senate seat being vacated by Senator Jon Kyl on Saturday, Congressman Trent ... More >>

Congressman Trent Franks Won't Run for Senate. God Apparently Changes Mind

Congressman Trent Franks is a no-go for the Senate seat being vacated by Senator Jon Kyl.​God, apparently, is a little indecisive.Despite having indicated earlier in the week that he would announce his plans to run for the Senate seat being vacated by Senator Jon Kyl on Saturday, Congressman Trent ... More >>

Morning Poll: Is Congressman Trent Franks Senate Worthy?

Congressman Trent Franks is mulling a run for Senate.​As you're probably well-aware, Senator Jon Kyl will not be running for re-election in 2012 -- and that means the who's who of Arizona's GOP are all rumored to be considering a run, including fagala-phobic Congressman Trent Franks, who made it c ... More >>

Congressman Jeff Flake Announces Senate Run

Congressional beefcake Jeff Flake wants to be a senator.​It's official: Republican Congressman Jeff Flake will run for the U.S. Senate seat being vacated by Senator Jon Kyl.Flake made his announcement this morning at the same Phoenix hotel where Kyl announced his upcoming retirement last week. Fla ... More >>

Senator Jon Kyl Calling it a Career (Shhh...Nobody Tell J.D. Hayworth)

Jon Kyl's calling it quits.​U.S. Senator Jon Kyl is expected to announce his retirement from the Senate at a news conference scheduled for 10 a.m. today, according to multiple news outlets, and speculation as to who will replace him is already running rampant.The obvious choice is Congressman Jeff ... More >>

Jason, Jan, and Jon: Politicos' Overstatements and Hypocritical Comments About Shooting in Tucson

Jason Rose bemoans the political climate he helped create.​Since Arizona is well knownfor its divisive politics and extreme rhetoric, it's no wonder that the eyes of the nation are on us.It is even less surprising that Arizona politicos started jumping into the fray -- issuing obvious s ... More >>

Jon Kyl Leading the Charge on Banning Animal "Crush" Videos

www.denbeath.com​If you've never heard of animal "crush" videos you're lucky. They're sick, cruel, and depraved. Yet people watch them -- legally."Crush" films are videos of people stepping on animals -- usually larger and arguably more pain-susceptible animals -- until they crush them to death.Ag ... More >>

Regarding Birthright Citizenship, What Is It About the U.S. Constitution That Nativists Don't Understand?

Jon Kyl Sends Map to Dopey Wisconsin Lawmaker Who Apparently Has No Clue Arizona Borders Mexico

Senator Jon Kyl​Big ups to Arizona Senator Jon Kyl, who last week sent a map to a member of the Milwaukee County Board of Supervisors who seems to think Arizona isn't a border state, yet found it within her jurisdiction to bash our new immigration law. Think ... More >>

Morning Poll -- Who's Lying: Senator Jon Kyl or President Barack Obama?

​At a recent meeting of Teabaggers here in Arizona, Senator Jon Kyl made the stunning allegation that during a private conversation he had with President Barack Obama, the president basically told him he was holding lawmakers "hostage" by not securing the border in order to pass some form of ... More >>

Jon Kyl Tapped as One of Time Magazine's "People Who Most Affect Our World"

www.lifenews.com Senator Jon Kyl​Big ups to Arizona's junior senator, Senator Jon Kyl, for being named one of Time magazine's 100 people who "most affect our world." Lady Ga-Ga, and Simon Cowell are also on the list, although, in a different category, so the distinction may ... More >>

Senator Jon Kyl Calls for Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid to Resign Over Obama "Negro Dialect" Comment

www.punditkitchen.com​Arizona Senator Jon Kyl isn't letting Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid get away with racially charged comments he made about Barack Obama during the 2008 presidential campaign.According to the recently released book Game Change, written about the 2008 presidential campaign b ... More >>

McCain and Kyl Bash Obama and Napolitano's Handling of Christmas Day Terror Scare

www.point-spreads.com​Both of Arizona's senators teamed up today to throw some jabs at how the Obama administration -- namely former Arizona governor and Homeland Security Chief Janet Napolitano -- handled the Christmas-day terror scare in Detroit.At an end-of-the-year press conference at John McC ... More >>

California Congressman Sticks Up for Our Bullied Governor Brewer

www.pe.com What happens when the Obama Administration picks on a Republican governor? Darrell Issa to the rescue!​ A California congressman has asked White House Chief of Staff Rahm Emanuel to answer to allegations that he attempted to bully our very own Governor Jan Brewer. In a scathing ... More >>

Obama Mafia Asks Governor if She Supports Jon Kyl and Wants to Kiss Stimulus Money Goodbye

    www.mrrl.org Has Obama taken the role of Don Corleone? In Corleone fashion, top Obama officials made Arizona Governor Jan Brewer an offer she shouldn't refuse. They want her to back the President's stimulas plan, and if she doesn't and agrees with Senator Jon Kyl,&n ... More >>

Hot Links: Arizona Senators Differ on Approval of TARP Funds; Phoenix Police Say Girl Forced to Eat Off Floor; State Employee Unionization Upgrade Halted

Senatorial differences: John McCain opposes giving bailout funds to the guy who stomped him in the presidential election. But Jon Kyl, who holds no such bias, says it's "too risky" to hold back on the funds. Another shocking case of child abuse: Police say a Valley couple forced their 9-year-o ... More >>

McCainia: Everybody Head for the Lawn…

Racist Daisy-Chain

The Wild Turkey calls the guv a coward, outs Republican white supremacists, and searches for Dennis Wilenchik’s lost subpoenas

Bush's Menu for State of the Union: Really Lame Duck

Letters From the Issue of Thursday, November 2, 2006

The Passion of El Cristo

What if Jesus Christ came back as an illegal alien?

Man Bites Dog

If we had it to do over, would we publish the satirical saga of Chef Kaz Yamamoto? Hell yes! Punk you, if you can't take a joke!

Letters From the Issue of Thursday, April 27, 2006

Stealth Zealot

Pop quiz. Who’s Arizona’s other U.S. senator? Here’s a clue: He makes Dubya look like a liberal

Uni Vision

Roll with it

Donkey Kong

After looking like political asses in the '90s, Arizona Democrats have the money, moderation and 800-pound gorilla to kick some pachyderm tail

Dem Quixote

Jim Pederson wants comfy outdoor dining without misters -- something all voters can agree on

Flashes

From the week of February 11, 1999

Flashes

From the week of January 28, 1999

Flashes

NO MINER CONSIDERATION

A CANADIAN MINING COMPANY WANTS TO DIG A 300-ACRE HOLE BEHIND DONNA GOODALE'S HOUSE. ALTHOUGH MOST ALL OF THE GOVERNMENT AGENCIES INVOLVED THINK IT'S A TERRIBLE IDEA, THEY MAY NOT BE ABLE TO STOP THE EXCAVATION.

WITH JON KYL, DULL DOESN'T MEAN HARMLESS

POLS TO THE WALL

BLAND AMBITION

HE'S RUNNING FOR THE U.S. SENATE ADS AN OUTSIDER, A BORING STRAIGHT ARROW WITH THE COMMON TOUCH.

INTERSTATE HIGH JINKS

LAND BATTLE PITS REP. JON KYL (R-DEL WEBB CORP.) AGAINST REP. JIM BILBRAY (D-SUMMA CORP.)