Rick Perry

Warbeast Bypasses Phoenix, Talks 9/11 Riffs With Us Anyway

Earlier this month, Gwar and Warbeast kicked off a tour and brought down the house at Tucson's Rialto Theatre. But the thrash metal gods, lo and behold, have forsaken us here in Phoenix, and the tour didn't come our way. Hell, the duo is even going through spots like Des Moines, Little Rock, Green ... More >>

John McCain Meets Neo-Nazi and Onetime J.T. Ready-Sidekick Harry Hughes

Neo-Nazi Harry Hughes is like the National Socialist Movement's version of the traveling gnome in those Travelocity.com commercials. See also: -Why Authorities Could've Prevented J.T. Ready's Murder Spree The Maricopa, Arizona-based swastika-lover's been photographed next to Pinal County Sheriff P ... More >>

2012 Republican National Convention Kicks Off in Tampa Next Week

See also: How to Speak Republican First, Republica's were enamored with George W. clone Texas Governor Rick Perry. Then they thought pizza guy Herman Cain was their man. Eventually, the roving finger pointed at Rick Santorum, and even Newt Gingrich (forget about Bachmann). But ultimately, boring Mo ... More >>

Paul Babeu is 'Republicans' Latest Nightmare,' Says Columnist in London Evening Standard

Columnist James Fenton called Pinal County Sheriff Paul Babeu "Republicans' latest nightmare" in a piece for the London Evening Standard. Fentons' column hit the presses about a week after New Times reported that Babeu's Mexican ex-boyfriend lobbed allegations that the sheriff threatened him and th ... More >>

Mitt Romney Wins Arizona's Republican Primary, Which Is Slightly More Surprising Than The Sun Rising This Morning

​With more than 91 percent of the precincts reporting to the Secretary of State's Office, GOP presidential candidate Mitt Romney's going to win Arizona's presidential primary.Shortly before midnight, Romney had 48 percent of the vote from Arizona Republicans, with Rick Santorum lagging behind him ... More >>

Bad Mormon: Mitt Romney's Anti-Immigrant Stance Doesn't Jibe with LDS Teachings

Shurman Finds Inspiration in Independence

Now that we all know most record companies are the loss leaders for their conglomerate parent company we always believed they were, you kinda wish just once someone at the label would say "I don't know how to do my job" instead of "We don't have a way of marketing you." That was the speech Aaron Be ... More >>

Rick Santorum Schmoozing Joe Arpaio Today -- A Tactic Which Hasn't Exactly Been Successful

​Former U.S. Senator and presidential candidate Rick Santorum is meeting with Maricopa County Sheriff Joe Arpaio today -- at least, according to the sheriff -- to become the next in the line of GOP candidates to come kiss Arpaio's rings.According to Arpaio, or his flak, presidential candidates Mit ... More >>

Joe Arpaio's Endorsement Still Worth Something, if Polls are to Be Trusted

​If public-opinion polls are to be trusted, then Maricopa County Sheriff Joe Arpaio's endorsement still is worth something to Arizonans.Arpaio's endorsement of some candidates hasn't worked out too well -- like former U.S. Senate candidate J.D. Hayworth, ousted Senate President Russell Pearce ... More >>

Has Joe Arpaio's Endorsement Become "Toxic?"

​Former presidential candidate Rick Perry pulled the plug on his failed campaign yesterday, which is the second time in two presidential elections that a candidate with Maricopa County Sheriff Joe Arpaio's backing failed to make it out of a GOP primary.As Valley attorney Chad Snow commented on our ... More >>

Rick Perry Bails on Presidential Campaign; Joe Arpaio Picks the Wrong Horse...Again

​If you happen to be running for president, do yourself a favor and avoid Maricopa County Sheriff Joe Arpaio like grim death -- for the second time in two presidential elections, Arpaio's horse in the race has crashed and burned.Just two days before the pivotal South Carolina primary, Texas Govern ... More >>

Arizona GOP Presidential Primary Likely Another Race For Second Place; Mitt Romney Holds Double-Digit Lead

​Arizona's GOP presidential primary, like New Hampshire's, will likely be another race for second place -- according to a recently released poll, former Massachusetts Governor (and one-time Joe Arpaio butt-smoocher) Mitt Romney has a double-digit lead over each of his opponents in the "Colt Single ... More >>

Political (Action) Figures: The Republican Candidates' Collectible Matches

​Remember when you stopped rehashing TV and comic book storylines with your action figures, and instead re-cast them to play out real-life drama? Like that one time your dad (played by Hordak) got drunk and totaled the minivan (a great stand-in by Ecto-1) then tried to hide it from your mom (the ... More >>

Remembering Marty Atencio, the Latest Fatality in Joe Arpaio's Jail

Joe Arpaio Apologist Rick Perry Still Thinks "Toughest Sheriff" Will Help His Campaign

​Maricopa County Sheriff Joe Arpaio's been in Iowa for the past few days to help his horse in the GOP presidential primary, Texas Governor Rick Perry, in his final push before state's January 3 caucuses.Apparently, Perry still thinks the sheriff's support is a good thing -- despite Arpaio's recent ... More >>

Sheriff Arpaio's Office, in Seeming Defiance of Judge, Arrests Five Suspected Illegal Immigrants on Human-Smuggling Charges

​   The Maricopa County Sheriff's Office arrested five men last night on suspicion of human smuggling and conspiracy, days after a federal judge's ruling on such investigations. Looks like Sheriff Joe Arpaio, under more pressure than ever to reform his ways, is sticking to his state ... More >>

Mitt Romney Will Be in Valley Tomorrow; Dan Quayle Endorsement Expected

www.icanhascheezburger.comFormere Vicee Presidente Dane Quaylee​GOP presidential candidate Mitt Romney will be in the Valley tomorrow, where he's likely to announce that former Vice President Dan Quayle is endorsing his bid for the presidency.Romney, as you may recall, is one of several GOPers who ... More >>

Fagala-Fearing Congressman Trent Franks Backs Michele "Pray Away the Gay" Bachmann in GOP Presidential Primary

​Arizona Congressman Trent Franks -- best known for his fear of homosexuals, his belief that black people were better off under slavery, and tackling the non-existent problem of race/gender-based abortions -- has endorsed his Congressional colleague Michele Bachmann in the GOP presidential prima ... More >>

Hispanic Republican Group: Joe Arpaio's Endorsement is Final Nail in Rick Perry's Coffin

​Rick Perry's presidential campaign is on life support at the moment, and according to a group of Hispanic Republicans, Joe Arpaio's recent endorsement of Perry could be the final nail in the Texas Governor's coffin."We believe the Arpaio endorsement is a colossal blunder from which Rick Perry wi ... More >>

Rick Perry and Joe Arpaio: the Bromance Explained (By the Sheriff Himself)

​Maricopa County Sheriff Joe Arpaio has officially picked his horse in the GOP presidential primary, Texas Governor Rick Perry, which came as a bit of shock to those familiar with America's self-proclaimed "toughest sheriff."Arpaio, as you probably know, is the poster-boy for bootin' brown folks b ... More >>

Will Joe Arpaio's Endorsement Hurt Rick Perry?

Could Joe Arpaio's endorsement be toxic for Rick Perry?​As you've probably heard, Maricopa County Sheriff Joe Arpaio will be in New Hampshire today where he's expected to endorse Texas Governor Rick Perry in the Republican presidential primary.Arpaio's nod could be a double-edged sword for Perry, ... More >>

Arpaio Ditched Tea Party for "Emergency" Meeting With Rick Perry; Replaced as Speaker by Matt "I Don't Respect Arpaio" Salmon

​The Red Mountain Tea Party bills itself as the largest weekly Tea Party meeting in America, and organizers were proud to get Maricopa County Sheriff Joe Arpaio to speak tonight.Arpaio blew the teabaggers off, though, because the sheriff had "an emergency that came up in his schedule that he could ... More >>

Joe Arpaio Makes It Official: Rick Perry's the Sheriff's Horse in GOP Presidential Primary; Hispanic Groups Already Lashing Out at Perry

​Maricopa County Sheriff Joe Arpaio today ended months of speculation about who he'd support in the GOP presidential primary by officially throwing his weight behind Texas Governor Rick Perry.Arpaio is currently in New Hampshire campaigning with Perry, which is where he gave his official nod.  ... More >>

Joe Arpaio to Endorse Rick Perry for President? Yeah...We're Scratching Our Heads, Too

​Maricopa County Sheriff Joe Arpaio, a man who's made a career out of bootin' brown folks back across the border, is reportedly going to endorse Rick Perry as the Republican nominee for president -- which is more than a little surprising (if it's true, that is), when you consider some of Perry's r ... More >>

Best Reader Caption For Photo of Herman Cain Brain-Farting: Bnbk

​Congratulations to the New Times reader who goes by the handle Bnbk, you are the proud winner of this week's New Times You Write the Caption contest.On Friday, we asked readers to provide what they think would be an appropriate caption for the above photo of presidential candidate Herman Cain b ... More >>

Best Reader Caption For Photo of Herman Cain Brain-Farting?

​Last week, we asked our readers to offer suggestions for an appropriate caption for the above photo of presidential candidate Herman Cain in the midst of a rather epic brain-fart for this week's New Times' You Write the Caption contest.If you missed Cain's cranial flatulence, click here to watc ... More >>

Worse Campaign Brain Fart: Herman Cain, Rick Perry, or Jan Brewer?

www.bumpybrains.com​Presidential candidate Herman Cain is the latest politico to join the campaign brain-fart club thanks to comments made to the Milwaukee Journal-Sentinel's editorial board  -- which include "[I] got all this stuff twirling around in my head" -- when asked whether he agrees ... More >>

Watch Herman Cain's Jan Brewer-Esque Brain Fart Right Here *VIDEO*

Hmmm...Libya, huh? Let's see...yeah, I got nothin'.​Presidential candidate Herman Cain is the latest politico to suffer a public bout with brain flatulence -- an affliction with which Arizona Governor Jan Brewer is all too familiar.Cain recently met with the Milwaukee Journal-Sentinel's editorial ... More >>

Tim Heidecker of Tim & Eric talks Herman Cain, Heidecker & Wood, and Tim & Eric's Billion Dollar Movie

​Despite recent the recent gaff by Rick Perry, Herman Cain can has remained the most entertaining Republican presidential candidate to watch. Whether he's switching up the lyrics of John Lennon's classic song "Imagine" to "imagine there's no pizza" (no thank you, Mr. Cain) or the number of wo ... More >>

Rick Perry's Jan Brewer Debate Moment *VIDEO*

Rick Perry has did gone the route of Arizona Governor Jan Brewer when it comes to looking like a total idiot during a debate.​Remember when Arizona Governor Jan Brewer had the most epic brain-fart in the history of public speaking during a televised debate last year (which in turn -- somehow -- ma ... More >>

6 Musicians With Surprising Political Affiliations

​Music is one of those creative things that only hippies do, or at least that's the stereotype. But seriously, what kind of self-respecting conservative would devote themselves to being a (guf-ah!) professional musician? And what already-famous musicians would commit the career suicide of adm ... More >>

Poll: Barack Obama Leads All Republican Presidential Candidates in Arizona

www.punditkitchen.com​If next year's presidential election were held today, President Barack Obama would carry Republican-leaning Arizona, according to a recent poll.According to a Rocky Mountain poll released yesterday, Obama leads all possible Republican candidates in Arizona by at least a five- ... More >>

GOP Candidates and Their Theme Songs

​Herman Cain was served a tall order when this video leaked a few days ago. He's got a reputation to protect. That reputation: Future Chief Executive Pizza Man and past Godfather's Pizza CEO. Damn it, Americans love pizza. Who is he to hide his affection toward the garnished bread? He might as wel ... More >>

Feedback from the Issue of Thursday, October 20th, 2011

Herman Cain Was Joking About Electrified Border Fence...Err, He Might Be Serious...Err, He Doesn't Want to Offend Anyone

James KingPresidential candidate Herman Cain might have been joking about building an electrified fence at the U.S. Mexico border -- we're still not sure.​Presidential candidate Herman Cain met with Maricopa County Sheriff Joe Arpaio this afternoon, but he was late to the meeting because of an unk ... More >>

Herman Cain Coming to Phoenix to Pucker Up For Joe Arpaio

www.sodahead.comGodfather's Pizza CEO/Gop presidential candidate Herman Cain.​Maricopa County Sheriff Joe Arpaio met with leaders from the Methodist Border Mission Network at his Phoenix office this afternoon to discuss -- amongst other things -- some issues the group has with the sheriff's polici ... More >>

Rick Perry's Texas Is a Fantasy Land

Arizona Dems on GOP Presidential Debate: Can Arizona's Tea Party Top Booing a Gay Soldier?

​Arizona Governor Jan Brewer announced yesterday that CNN will produce a "major" debate in Arizona between GOP presidential candidates.Jan's "thrilled.""I've been in politics a long time, but I can't remember a more critical election than this," she says. "When it comes to some of the hallmark iss ... More >>

Joe Arpaio Not Ruling Out Running For Senate (So He Says)

This guy has $6 million -- and is pretending to be considering a run for Senate.​Stop us if you've heard this one before, but Maricopa County Sheriff Joe Arpaio says he's not ruling out running for the Senate seat getting vacated by retiring Senator Jon Kyl -- which, if history tells us anything, ... More >>

Mitt Romney Now Jeff Flake-Approved

www.burningplatform.comGOP presidential candidate Mitt Romney, it appears, will likely take the Mormon vote -- including Congressman Jeff Flake.​Congressman Jeff Flake has picked his horse in the GOP presidential primary -- and it's not Michele Bachman.Former Massachusettes Governor Mitt Romney an ... More >>

Which GOPer Will Joe Arpaio Endorse For the Presidency (A.K.A. Who Will Kiss His A$$ the Hardest)?

www.sodahead.com​When Republican candidates for president meet the pope, they only have to kiss his ring. As has apparently been decided by GOP political strategists, when they meet Maricopa County Sheriff Joe Arpaio, they have to kiss his ass.According to Arpaio, four GOP presidential candidates ... More >>

Michele Bachmann Puckers Up For Joe Arpaio; Plans to Target Arizona in 2012 GOP Primary

Image: James KingMichele Bachmann puckering up for Joe Arpaio.​ For all of about three minutes, presidential candidate/Minnesota Congresswoman Michele Bachmann met with reporters and Maricopa County Sheriff Joe Arpaio this afternoon, during which she gave the sheriff a metaphorical smooch right on ... More >>

Watch MyFoxPhoenix Inflate Joe Arpaio's Already Soaring Ego *VIDEO*

​Maricopa County Sheriff Joe Arpaio, as of late, has been not-so-subtly bragging that GOP presidential candidates are (allegedly) calling on him for campaign advice.According to the sheriff, Texas Governor Rick Perry, who is widely considered the front-runner in the race to become the GOP presiden ... More >>

Did Rick Perry Commit "Latino Political Suicide" By Buddyin' Up to Joe Arpaio?

www.freeimagesfun.comAccording to the Tequila Party, Texas Governor Rick Perry just committed "Latino policitcal suicide."​According to Maricopa County Sheriff Joe Arpaio's ghost-"tweeters," the sheriff and presidential hopeful/Texas Governor Rick Perry chatted over the weekend about "immigration ... More >>

GOP Presidential Hopefuls Should Ask Joe Arpaio About His Elvis-Themed Panty Parties

James KingPresidential hopefuls (allegedly) want to talk to Joe Arpaio about immigration. They should ask about some of his other passions, including the Elvis-themed panty party he threw at his Tent City jail earlier this year. ​According to Maricopa County Sheriff Joe Arpaio's ghost-"tweeters," ... More >>

Asylum Denied: Unlike Refugees from Other Troubled Countries, Only a Fraction of Mexicans Seeking U.S. Asylum Are Accepted -- No Matter Their Wounds or Stories

Joe Arpaio's Neo-Nazi Supporters Surface for Bill Montgomery Event, and Phoenix Police Chief Jack Harris Slams SB 1070

JT Ready & pals try to give Joe Arpaio and Bill Montgomery some Nazi love in Phoenix today As most of you have no-doubt heard, there's strong speculation that Sheriff Joe Arpaio will announce his run for Arizona Governor on Monday. Personally, I hope he does run. He'll have to resign to d ... More >>

On Frequenting Cantinas and Being Opposed to Illegal Immigration

The Fire and the Flame

For U2 fans feeling burned by the group's excesses, the band's latest album and tour is a soul-affirming revival

Hold On, I'm Cummings!

Burton Cummings is either rock's most unsung hero or its most overlooked fugitive pervert