The Colbert Report

Phoenix Police Took in at Least 800 Guns in Latest Buyback

Phoenix police estimate that more than 800 guns were turned in during this weekend's buyback event, billed as being the biggest gun-buyback event in the history of Arizona.Those guns will all be destroyed, since the new law preventing the destruction of guns turned over during buyback events in Ariz ... More >>

Colbert on Yelp: "The Critical Palate of Zagat With Not Having Anything Better to Do"

Monday night on The Colbert Report, Stephen Colbert joined the chorus of people who like to hate on Yelp, the business-review site. Colbert called Yelp a social media site that combines the "critical palate of Zagat with not having anything better to do." See also: - Is Yelp Fair to Restaurants? - ... More >>

Arizona's Lands on the Daily Show Yet Again, This Time for "Protecting Guns From People"

Yet again, the state of Arizona is the subject of one of Comedy Central's news programs, this time thanks to Tucson gun advocates who are "standing up for guns."This time, the Daily Show with Jon Stewart profiled the gun-worshipers who are protesting the gun-buyback programs in Tucson, as well as Re ... More >>

Best Arizona-Related Segment From the Colbert Report?

Last week, we sifted through the archives of the Colbert Report, and found some of the best Arizona-based clips in the show's history.As was the case with the Colbert Report's comedy-news counterpart, the Daily Show with Jon Stewart, there were plenty of segements to choose from.See also:-Arizona's ... More >>

Arizona's Top 10 Appearances on the Colbert Report

The joke's on Arizona so much that we had to separate the state's best appearances on Comedy Central "news" shows into two lists.Last week, we brought you some of the best Arizona-themed segments from the Daily Show with Jon Stewart. Now, we've gone through the Colbert Report's archives, to bring yo ... More >>

Joe Arpaio and Steven Seagal Star as Complete Asses on the Colbert Report

Please reset the "days without an Arizona-related Comedy Central news segment" counter back to zero.Thanks to Sheriff Joe Arpaio taking this weekend to exploit dead children by inviting the media and a pseudo-celebrity to a simulated school shooting, Arpaio and Steven Seagal were featured on yesterd ... More >>

Consider the Hapifork: A Fork That Vibrates To Keep You From Overeating

The Hapifork is a bluetooth enabled phone fork that vibrates when it detects you're eating too quickly. No word as to whether it also yells at you to get your elbows off the table and we like to think that it vibrates so hard that it causes you to fling food across the table. This latest weight loss ... More >>

12 News Anchor Mark Curtis Does Not Deny That His Mustache Causes Female Orgasms

12 News anchor Mark Curtis stopped short of confirming that his porn-star mustache does indeed help women reach orgasm, but did address comedy-news guy Stephen Colbert's accusation that it does just that.Curtis did say on the 12 News newscast last night that his mustache has "mystical and therapeuti ... More >>

12 News Anchor Mark Curtis' Mustache May Cause Female Orgasms (Says Stephen Colbert)

The porn-star mustache on the upper lip of 12 News anchor Mark Curtis may help women reach orgasm during sex -- at least, according to the Colbert Report's Stephen Colbert.Explaining treatments for what Colbert calls Low-T and Low-O (testosterone, and orgasm, respectively), Colbert referenced a 12 N ... More >>

Tom Horne's Snakepit, Bill Montgomery's Dirty Money, and the Problem with Carmen Chenal

The media's been hot for Arizona Attorney General Tom Horne's head over allegations that during the 2010 campaign he was improperly involved in supporter-turned-staffer Kathleen Winn's independent expenditure committee Business Leaders for Arizona. See also: -Tom Horne's Alleged Hit-and-Run at an ... More >>

2012 Republican National Convention Kicks Off in Tampa Next Week

See also: How to Speak Republican First, Republica's were enamored with George W. clone Texas Governor Rick Perry. Then they thought pizza guy Herman Cain was their man. Eventually, the roving finger pointed at Rick Santorum, and even Newt Gingrich (forget about Bachmann). But ultimately, boring Mo ... More >>

Your Gonzo Guide to the Republican National Convention

Top Phoenix Music Stories of the Week

The news waits for no one -- at least that's what we read somewhere -- so it's perfectly understandable that you, the reader, might have missed out on a musical tidbit, breaking news about your favorite venue, or one of our rants. So enjoy this digest-style sampling of some of our biggest stories f ... More >>

Win Tickets to Talib Kweli's "Prisoner of Conscious" Show at Club Red

Talib Kweli doesn't seem to like downtime. Last year he released the celebrated Gutter Rainbows, and Idle Worship, a nu-soul collaboration with singer-songwriter Res, teamed with Yaslin Bay (his partner in Black Star) for the Colbert Report, and took to the streets for Occupy Wall Street. It's dif ... More >>

Colbert Struggles With NYC Soda Ban, Conan Offers Alternatives

New York City Mayor Michael Bloomberg's proposed ban on high-capacity drink containers has caused ripples and repercussions he could never have imagined, including the effect on law-abiding citizens like comedian Stephen Colbert.

Brazilian Little Pieces

Stephen Colbert Riffs on Richard Branson's Head-cicles

Richard Branson is the chairman of the massive international business conglomerate Virgin Group. This, er, outspoken businessman is no stranger to the headlines as he's tried everything from circumnavigating the Earth in a balloon to creating the first commercial space tourism business. But this . ... More >>

Stephen Colbert on"Snacksploration" and "Second Breakfast"

Responsible snacking is for the birds. As 'mericans we should be able to consume as many calories as we possibly can in one sitting. No one is going to take that right away from us! But our right to gourge ourselves on 600 calorie chocolate bars is being threatened. Mars Candy recently annonced ... More >>

Top Five Late Night Music Moments of 2011

Welcome to another installment of Up on the Sun's 2011 Review. We've been counting down our favorite songs, shows, national and local releases of 2011. This installment takes a look at 2011's most memorable moments in late night television. Enjoy!​ Television occasionally has some special moments ... More >>

This Has Been a Good Week For Black Star Fans

​It's been a really great week for Black Star fans -- and I'm one of them. Black Star, the 1998 collaboration between Mos Def and Talib Kweli is one of my favorite hip-hop albums. The duo performed "Fix Up," produced by the nearly always awesome Madlib, on The Colbert Report, on Wednesday, October ... More >>

Sheriff Joe Arpaio and His Fiesta Bowl Freebie

John McCain's Bigotry Earns Hashtag, Near-Universal Ridicule, Help from Bigot-Boy Sheriff

TwitterNo hash pipe for McCain, but his stupidity has scored him his own hashtagGuess I've heard the last from U.S. Senator John McCain's haughty, over-paid flack Brooke Buchanan.Yesterday, in the midst of a PR meltdown that's turned McCain (once again) into a political laughingstock, his office iss ... More >>

Earl Sweatshirt Mystery Gets More Complicated

​More alleged details about Earl Sweatshirt's whereabouts and his happiness, or lack thereof, have been discovered, according to Pitchfork.First, let's recap his situation. Back in April, Complex managed to crack the case and find Earl and revealed that he is at a boarding school in Samoa. Earl's ... More >>

Taco Bell to Beef-Battle Lawyers: Thank You for Suing Us. Now We're Suing You. (Double DONG!)

​Taco Bell is calling bullshit on a lawsuit filed two weeks ago challenging the actual beef content in its tacos with a massive marketing campaign launched last Friday. In addition to a YouTube campaign starring TB's president, Greg Creed, proclaiming the taco mixture is 88 percent beef (not 35 ... More >>

Jam Band Charity: Deadheads and Phish Phans Focus on Giving

​Hardcore fans of jam bands are a very giving, as are the bands they support. The Grateful Dead recently donated some band memorabilia to a charity auction, while Phishheads/Phans (call them what you will) have raised and distributed over $1 million for charity organizations started by fans of the ... More >>

Drunk Without Drinking? Five Ways People Try to Get Hammered Without Actually Drinking

​Recently we came across a drinking game called "Louisville Slugger." To play, one drinks a can of beer as fast as possible while a partner counts the seconds. For every second, the drinker must revolve around a baseball bat held steady against the ground. Then the drinker must pick up the bat ... More >>

Arnold Schwarzenegger Latest Celeb/Politician To Dis Arizona's SB 1070

The Governator yuks it up at AZ's expenseYou know it's bad when California's tres unpopular, washed-up screen star guv -- whose dad was a member of the Nazi party back in the day -- is using your state's "papers please" law as the butt of his shuck-and-jive before a crowd of college grads."I was als ... More >>

SB 1070: Many Shout That Arizona's New Immigration Law Has Awakened a Sleeping Giant Who's Ready to Kick Some Political and Economic Backside

April 26 In Blogs: Colbert Report, M.I.A., Whiplash Whopper, and Jesse James

​​In the 24-hour news cycle, it can be difficult to keep up. We have the solution. Check back on Valley Fever every evening for highlights from each of New Times' blogs. Today's entries: Feathered Bastard: Rasmussen Reports 60 Percent of the (White) Electorate Support Racial Profiling, the ... More >>

Michael Jackson Family Reality Show, Ida Maria's Boston Freakout, Kanye West Photoshop Craze

Electric Mustache: Listen To Electric Mustache On BreakThru RadioIdolator: I Knew That Having Ida Maria On The Perez Hilton Tour Would Be A Bad IdeaNME: Jackson family reality TV show on the wayNME: Bon Jovi joins ex-Nirvana members in condemning Guitar Hero over Kurt CobainPitchfork: Devo Reissue C ... More >>

Bill Maher Hosts Janet Napolitano This Friday on HBO's Real Time with Bill Maher

from HBOWill Maher go light on Nappy, or call her on the carpet for her ties to Sheriff Joe?Just learned that scathing political humorist Bill Maher will have Homeland Security secretary Janet Napolitano on his HBO show Real Time with Bill Maher, which airs this Friday, July 24 at 10 p.m.  ... More >>

Stephen Colbert to Give ASU Commencement?

The class of 2009 had Obama, but Arizona State University's class of 2010 is recruiting the leader of a different sort of nation to deliver their commencement address: The Colbert Nation. More than 3,000 ASU students have joined a group on Facebook with the goal of landing Stephen Colbert and his ... More >>

Neo-Nazis and Extreme Right-Wingers Love Joe Arpaio, and There’s Evidence that the MCSO Keeps Them Close

Stephen Colbert Turns Joe Arpaio into a Creampuff in 6.5 Minutes

photo by David Shankbone Colbert played Arpaio like a two-bit ocarina Monday night, faux right-winger Stephen Colbert showed how long it takes to make pastry out of Maricopa County's corrupt top constable: exactly six and a-half minutes. The whole Colbert Report segment was predictably goofy. ... More >>

Stephen Colbert Smoochin' Joe Arpaio: America's Voice Fires Up Last-Minute E-mail Campaign

Will Arpaio be in on the joke? In a last-ditch effort to impact the way Stephen Colbert treats mean ol' Joe Arpaio on The Colbert Report tonight, the folks at the pro-immigration org America's Voice are urging people to e-mail a message to the show's producers through their Web site. Thi ... More >>

Mad Maz

Middle Eastern funnyman is Persian – like the cat

TV on the Radio on The Colbert Report: Better than the Grammys

The Colbert ReportMon - Thurs 11:30pm / 10:30cTV on the Radio - Dancing ChooseColbert Report Full EpisodesFunny Political NewsChristian Bale ParodyJoke of the DayTV on the Radio appeared on The Colbert Report on Monday night to perform their single "Dancing Choose," off their latest album, the cri ... More >>

Hancock squanders potential greatness with lame humor and a half-baked hero

New Times' top DVD picks scheduled for release this week

Great Lake Swimmers

The mountain says what

Any Other Preguntas?