Not feeling awful enough after all that holiday binging? Need a little push to help send you into the glutton-free lifestyle? Here are five things that should do the trick and shame you into changing your eating habits.
Because we all know that hating yourself is the first step to eating healthier.
See Also: Epic Chef: A Cooking Competition Meets a Drinking Game EatWave Vending Machine Promises to Dispense Nuked to Order Food
This is Why You're Fat: cataloging where things went wrong
On the This is Why You're Fat tumblr "where dreams become heart attacks," you'll find such appetite-repelling dishes as a deep fried poutine calzone, yogurt covered Cheetos, and our personal favorite, a KFC double down wedged between two hefty glazed donuts. Click through enough archived pages and you'll not only feel bad for your eating habits, but the eating habits of the entire human race.
The Candwhich- where self-respect goes to die.
What's a candwich? Why, it's a sandwhich, in a can! Why had we not thought of this before?
Because it's wrong. So very wrong.
But Americans just can't help ruining a good thing. The Candwhich comes in three varieties including PB &J and Honey Barbecued Chicken.We first learned about this culinary mutant through a rather nauseating site known as Uglyfood.com where among other featured delicacies are fermented herring, barbecued bat, and cat litter cake.
Not only will you start eating healthier after viewing (or worse, sampling) these items, you'll probably just forgo eating all together.
Eat more holiday flavored Pringles? I'd rather have shingles.
Once you pop, there is a definite line where the fun should stop. Pringles completely jumped the shark this season with the launch of three not-so-wise flavors: cinnamon sugar, pumpkin spice, and worst yet, white chocolate peppermint. In what seems like a desperate attempt to stay new and exciting, this novelty brand of tube chips ended up with the culinary equivalent of malpractice.
Eat all three of these limited-time only products and you'll rue the day you ever ventured into the realm of progressive potato chips.
Epic Meal Time: taking the things you love and destroying them.
We don't know a single person high enough to enjoy the monstrosities coming out of the Epic Meal Time kitchen. From Tex-Mex Indian and Breakfast Pizzas, to Cinnaburgers and Meat Cereal, this site is nothing but bowel shaking regret and heart attacks. What's worse is that not only will their culinary monstrosities make your stomachs turn, they'll also ruin the image of perfectly good ingredients in your kitchen.
A trio of Taco Bell travesties
Take a pile of cheese drenched nachos, stuff them inside a grilled burrito then put it on par with the quality and nutritional merit you'd expect from an establishment that became infamous for selling Grade E meat, and you my friend have the new Loaded Griller from Taco Bell. This new menu item launched nationwide on December 20, and comes in three gut-busting styles: Loaded Potato, Spicy Buffalo Chicken and Beefy Nacho. Eat all three, and you may find yourself committed to salad for the rest of the month.
