Attention breeders with a penchant for procrastination: Halloween is next week. And while it's easy enough to get your kid the old stand-by costume in a bag -- princess, vampire, the plain but classic pumpkin -- this year, we want you to think outside the box, and possibly the realm of what's appropriate, with our 10 favorite alternative costumes for children.
The Big Lebowski
Dressing your little dude as "the dude" is a costume idea the Cohen Brothers could really get behind. Sure, he may have no idea what's going on, but as long as you keep those virgin white Russians coming, a.k.a. vanilla flavored milk, the dude will abide.
The royal baby has nothing on the Prince toddler. Decked out in his iconic purple suit -- or ass-less yellow leotard -- the Prince child will be an easy guess for anyone old enough to sing the lyrics to "Purple Rain." Your child might resemble a gay pirate to everyone else.
Whether you're doing it to show your artistic appreciation or you simply want to draw a unibrow on your baby, the Frida Kahlo costume is a sophisticated alternative to the mainstream mob of trick-or-treating ballerinas, superheroes, and Disney characters.
But good luck explaining that to your hairy baby.
Whether you're shooting for Benjamin Button, The Golden Girls, or generic geriatric, dressing your junior as a little senior is adorable to everyone -- except maybe the elderly.
Edward Scissor Hands
The Edward Scissor Hands costume for kids encourages parents to throw caution to the wind and hand their child the sharpest tools in the shed -- or cutlery drawer in this case. Sure someone might get hurt, but that's just the price you pay when living vicariously through your children.
The Wayne's World baby costumes tell the world two things. One: Your offspring is set to grow up with some very cool parents. Two: They apparently make wigs for babies.
What little Lil' Wayne lacks as a solid role model, he makes up for with one of the most gangster costumes on the block. To achieve Weezy's look, just skip the shirt, give your kid some shades, hand him a washable marker, and let him have at it.
Bitches ain't shit but a trick or a treat.
Elliot and E.T.
It will not be hard to sell this costume to your kid. Just mention the bike, the alien in the basket, that fact that he'll hit up twice as many houses by trick-or-treating on two wheels.
You might want to break the news about the flying bike though.
Booze and cigarettes
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Let the other parents know that you're a father first and a party animal second by incorporating your two loves into your father-son costume. Papa Jack and baby Marlboro will no doubt be the talk of the town as well as the source of some conservative stink eye.
Breaking Bad may have made television history, but Breaking Bad baby won the Internet. While some parents may protest dressing your child up as a meth-cooking kingpin, the real Walter White fans will give your baby Heisenberg the standing ovation he deserves.