Welcome to the summer of the breakup. No one is safe. Neither Gwen Stefani and Gavin Rossdale nor Batfleck and Jennifer Garner. Not that eyebrow kid who quit One Direction and then quit being engaged to Perrie Edwards or Miranda Lambert and Blake Shelton. Not even Miss Piggy and Kermit the Frog's decades-spanning union can escape.
It's a confusing time, a frightening time. You probably have a lot of questions, including but not limited to: Is love dead? Are we all doomed to be alone? Should we give up and dive right on in to Grey Gardening the rest of our stupid, pointless, and not even famous lives?
The resounding answer is no. Or at least, it's: um, not quite yet.
Why? Because these duos are not our true arbiters of whether love is dead. Not even close. Gwen wrote an entire breakup album about calling it quits with Gavin before they even got married. Shelbert is like the worst celeb relationship combo name of all time. Obviously, that situation was doomed from the get-go. And, hey, we love the Muppets. So much. But we are fully aware that they are not actual living creatures. (Also, come on. Those two fought a lot.)
Here are 10 celebrity couples whose enviable relationships signify whether love is alive and well. Love will be dead when, and only when, all of them break up.
Megan Mullally & Nick Offerman
The actors who brought to life Parks and Recreation's Ron Swanson and Tammy 2 are true relationship inspirations — especially when it comes to repulsive, hilarious, and sometimes adorable public displays of affection that occasionally involve beef jerky slapping.
Ellen Degeneres & Portia De Rossi
Power suit. Power gown. Power haircuts. This power couple has it all — including such good taste in real estate.
Iman & David Bowie
Unparalleled androgyny + impressive lankiness = more than two decades as one of the world's prettiest couples.
Tina Fey & Jeff Richmond
Liz Lemon once said, "Love is weird and sometimes gross. Love is elusive. And you found it. So treasure it." Tina abides, and so should everyone.
Snoop Dogg & Shante Broadus
Though the high school sweethearts divorced in the early 2000s, they remarried after a few years apart. That means Shante put up with that Snoop Lion malarkey. That's real love.
Neil Patrick Harris & David Burtka
We bet you're thinking: Ugh, be cuter, why don't they? Hey, guess what. They totally did. Please just Google how they totally crush Halloween group costumes.
Oprah Winfrey & Stedman Graham
Possibly the best argument for not getting married while also being worth billions, Oprah and Stedman have it all figured out — and also Gayle. She seems great.
Christine Taylor & Ben Stiller
Earth to [your name here], the world needs more Zoolander movies. (Yes, even beyond the forthcoming sequel.) We trust these two will stick together to give the world just that.
Jay-Z & Beyoncé
If we are to listen to Beyoncé's eponymous album and assume all the explicit sex jams, er, songs are about her husband, it sounds like these two really like each other. Remember when Jay-Z rapped that Bey's "breasteses are [his] breakfast"? It doesn't get more serious than that.
Judd Apatow & Leslie Mann
The couple that makes oppressively long movies together stays together. It's basic math.