Oh, Carrie, Samantha, Miranda and Charlotte. We grew up idolizing your glamorous New York lifestyle -- boozy cocktail parties, haute couture, rhinestone-studded Rolodexes of hot, eligible men. But when you're old enough to worry about getting carded for AARP discounts instead of drinks, it's time to move on and let go.
Carrie and Big got hitched. Samantha went back to the swinging single life. Miranda and Charlotte are knee-deep in baby crap. Where else is there to go? Apparently, the Middle East. Like the forthcoming Pirates of the Caribbean 4 and Spider Man prequel, Sex and the City 2 is likely doomed to sink like the Titanic down to Wal-Mart's $5 movie bin.
Still, there are a few compelling reasons to march your Jimmy Choos down to the theatre and see the sequel:
5. The Cocktails: What, you thought we watched Sex and the City for the plot? SATC's cocktail-swilling cast paved the way for lushes to be able to enjoy fruity frou-frou drinks without looking like pansies.
As the popularity of the series grew, so did restaurants' cocktail lists. Chains including T.G.I. Friday's have invented Sex and the City-inspired adult beverages like the Park Avenue Princess and Glamour Gal. Beer? Wine? Shots? Screw that when you can enjoy something that tastes more like a Jolly Rancher and less like a urinal cake.
4. The Nudity: If it's SATC-related, someone's getting naked. More like everyone's getting naked -- except maybe pasty, saggy Chris Noth and Kristin Davis' frozen Charlotte. With Samantha living on the beach next to a Latin hottie, it was easy to cram some three-ways and full frontal male nudity into the first film.
We're not sure how the SATC2 crew's going to manage that in the United Arab Emirates, but you can bet at least a few characters will appear in the buff -- even if they have to arrange a few "accidental" wardrobe malfunctions to make it happen.
| Carrie's sole reason for existing. |
3. The Fashion: Seriously, the SATC gals have more costume changes than a Broadway starlet. If you're not familiar with the names Theirry Mugler, Christian Louboutin or Graeme Black, your label-clueless self won't give a rat's ass about the fashions featured in Sex and the City 2.
But that doesn't mean you can't have fun.
If there's one thing that SATC1 scene in Carrie's apartment closet taught us, it's that for every cute babydoll dress and dazzling snakeskin print heel, there's a pair of gold harem pants to be made fun of.
2. The Politics: You have to wonder what the sequel's writers were thinking (other than the obvious milking of the SATC cash cow). Clearly, listening to four middle-aged women gab about their vaginal health or lack of recent sex -- over lunch, natch -- isn't disconcerting enough.
Brilliant plan: I know, let's send Carrie and pals to a region with repressive sexual politics and conservative beliefs so we can see how much shit their foul mouths and slutty clothes stir up there! Bad for international relations, good for audiences.
1. The Sex: If you are a straight male and you take your girlfriend/wife/ex/booty call/friend from church to see Sex and the City 2, you will likely get laid. First off, she'll be grateful you sacrificed your Friday night with the guys to take her to a chick flick.
Second, she'll think you're so effing sensitive and sweet for suggesting SATC 2 over the Nightmare on Elm Street remake you'd rather be seeing. And third, you'll reap the sweet, sticky benefits of your date watching half-naked hunks get it on with her favorite foursome.
