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Election Night 2010: Our Totally Unauthorized Drinking Guide

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Yeah yeah, we know. All the best election night watering holes in this town are dust. Ancient history. We miss the Newsroom and Nixon's, too. There's plenty to be depressed about, from the state of the city's bar scene to the state of the nation. 

But if you're planning to cry in your beer tonight instead of sipping tea -- hell, even if you are a tea partier -- you've got to drink somewhere.

We're here to help.

Now, we're not saying you're actually invited to any of these shindigs, but here's our guide to where you just might find some election-related festivities this evening. And if you are a fervent Prop. 203 (medical marijuana) supporter, might we suggest rubbing elbows with like supporters at Alice Cooper'stown, 101 E. Jackson St. in Phoenix, or from the comfort of your own couch, with the curtains drawn. Hey, even if the prop passes, the stuff's not legal -- yet. 

Even before the polls close, you're likely to find more than a handful of pre-partiers at Tom's Tavern downtown, 1 Renaissance Square. 

Get the rest of the party news -- including where to bowl and where to eat for free -- after the jump. 

Democrats have claimed the Wyndam Hotel, 50 E. Adams Street in Phoenix, as their election night territory. We hear there's a super-top-secret party on the hotel's roof, and that even tippy-top-level Goddard staffers couldn't get on the invite list. But we also know of plebian-friendly plans to gather at Hanny's, 40 N. 1st Street, (the department store-turned-posh-downtowner hangout) for more than a few stiff martinis. 

You'll find Republicans nearby at the Hyatt Regency, 122 N. 2nd Street, where Ben Quayle might be getting dirty after his private family party, and where U.S. Senator John McCain is scheduled to purchase claim his victory at 7:30 p.m.. 

We're not certain Maricopa County Supervisor Mary Rose Wilcox is planning to party at El Portal, her Mexican restaurant near downtown, but you definitely won't find us there, after what we've read (and written) about that place. Instead, we recommend Congressman Ed Pastor's party at El Matador, 125 E. Adams, where inside sources report there will be "lots of food." And you can't forget Silvana Esparza's Barrio Cafe, 2814 North 16th Street in Phoenix, for some serious anti-SB1070 rallying with a side of kickass margaritas.

If you're feeling swanky, head to Scottsdale for Republican Democratic congressional candidate John Hulburd's party, which we hear will be HQ'd at the W Hotel's lobby lounge, the Living Room, 7277 E. Camelback Road. 

Perhaps the best time will be had at Lucky Strike Lanes, the new CityScape bowling alley, where a group of kid-friendly folks are hoping Proposition 302 will strike out. Details about that party here. 

Other election night recommendations, from some long-time Valley election night rabble rousers: Durant's (if you're old or just old school); Postino on Central (hipsters); Sierra Bonita Grill (North Central crowd). 

Driving: If local law enforcement has any idea how much alcohol will be consumed by either side, they'll be out in full force. Therefore, we suggest the Valley's full range of taxis, golf carts, Light Rail cars, pedi-cabs and whatever the hell else has someone who probably doesn't care as much, or at least didn't drink as much, behind the pedals. Here are some helpful numbers:

City-Wide Taxis:
AAA Yellow Cab: 602-252-2000
All-State Cab: 602-275-8888‎
Checker Cab: 602-257-1818
Discount Cab: 602-200-2000

Scottsdale Golf Carts:
Bunny Rides: 602-405-2106 (Runs from 4 p.m.to 3 a.m.)
Swift Rides: 602-909-2288 (Runs from 9 p.m.to 3 a.m.)

Heading somewhere else or have any suggestions? Leave 'em in the comment section!

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