In the spirit of bored rich people, dumb hats, and excuses to get drunk off of bourbon, we were inspired to recommend a few crazy-strong, southern cocktails and shots, just in time for this weekend's Kentucky Derby.
A few classic, a few unusual -- these mixes (with recipes) are bound to give anyone enough liquid courage to rock any variety of fugly, derby-style headgear. Hey, there are contests to be won ...
1) Flaming Horse Piss (shot)
1 oz Jack Daniel's
1/2 oz Monster® energy drink
1 oz lemon juice
2 oz Pale ale
1/2 oz vodka
It's a fitting name and a fitting way to get shnockered-- fast. Because sometimes, it's just easier to drink Flaming Horse Piss in one fell swoop.
2) Texas Tea
Equal parts tequila, rum, vodka, gin, bourbon, triple sec, sweet and sour and a little splash of coca cola.
Hey, at least it looks classy
3) Alabama Slammer
Vodka, Southern Comfort, amaretto, sloe gin and orange juice.
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Now you and your headache are wearing a hat!
4) The Mint Julep
The reasons for our head nod to this bourbon bad boy have nothing to do with 19th Century Derby history and have everything to do with the effects of bourbon in a glass with some rocks and a mint sprig.
5) The Hand Grenade
As a common cocktail on Bourbon Street, we're gonna go ahead and trust the ingredients in this one will do the trick.